Illegal to check cheating spouse's email?

IMO if your spouse is cheating on you, then your life may be in jeopardy, like it would be if an armed intruder broke into your home. Who knows what kind of disease(s) s/he may have contracted and could pass onto you? You have a right to protect your children and yourself. In this particular case, the wife was cheating on her husband (husband #3) with husband #2, who was once arrested for beating her in front of her son. Husband #3 forwarded the email to husband #1 (father of the child), who then filed an emergency motion to get custody. Some things just aren’t black and white, and in this situation, I think the husband did the right thing.
 
JeanneMarie said:
I'm in the camp that thinks two wrongs don't make a right.

If being in a marriage negates all rights to privacy, then I would have been in trouble a long, long time ago. There is no way I could have stayed around one person for all these years without some things being private. Not that there is anything to hide, but my DH does NOT read my emails. He doesn't have my password and I don't have his.

Of course what she did was wrong. That doesn't make what he did right.

(And for what it's worth, I think it's absurd to prosecute him.)
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ITA! (and you've saved me some typing!)

Legally, getting married doesn't negate ones individuality or ones individual rights (not like the old days, when people couldn't imagine that a married woman could be 'raped', since her husband had rights over her, or when married women couldn't have their own bank accounts. I don't think we want to go back to those days).

I think both parties were in the wrong, but felony charges do seem excessive.
 
Interesting issue. I think it depends on largely whether you're looking at it form a moral or a legal standpoint.

A few things to add to the conversation:

1) Work email and home email are two different animals. At work, you are given the email as a benefit, and likely a tool, of your employment. You use it at (and for) work and your boss/hr dept/computer guy has your password (or can override it). There is no "personal" component to it. Often, you are restricted in your use of email at work by company policy and/or you are given policy that indicates your email is subject to review (with penalties for misuse that are as serious as termination).

2) Especially if she had the passwords sitting next to the computer (as a poster noted), the wife has no reasonable expectation of privacy it the email. Spouse or not, if she took no method to conceal the password and hold the email as her own, he can look. It's as if she left a letter sitting on the desk. If she hadn't left the password there, there is still a low chance of expectation of privacy against someone that lives there, etc.

3) I don't think that it matters at all that they are spouses. Spouses can commit crimes against each other and are held to the same criminal standard as any other two people would be. There's no heightened amount of responsibility or privacy because they are spouses. Maybe what people are thinking of is spousal priviledge. A spouse can claim a marital prividelge and choose (the key word being choose) not to testify against the other spouse, but that is not something that has to be done or can be forced in any way. It's a privilege (asserted to protect the sanctitiy of the relationship) but is the person's decision. That never prevents a spouse from claiming crime agfainst her by her husband (and vice versa).

4) With new law, and with more technology, come the tests within the legal system. Sure, this may not be what the law was designed for but certainly, she has enough to start a proceeding and test the theories.

5) The better question regarding the evidence, though the point may be moot if she is already divorced, is whether the Judge will allow it to be admitted as evidence in the divorce matter given the method by which it was obtained.
 
My DH and I have a definite expectation of some privacy w/in our relationship. Eachother's email/facebook/texts/etc are not open for one another to go into whenever we want. Sometimes he will be on f/b or email and walk away for some reason w/o logging off. If I notice it I log him out. I don't look at anything.

Just as much as one can take the view point of "well if you have nothing to hide, it shouldn't matter if your spouse looks at your email, texts, etc." there is the flipside to that of "well if you trust one another then allowing for some privacy in those areas should not be a problem."

There is a definite amount of trust involved in allowing for privacy within a marriage and if trust is supposed to be a major component of a marriage then why would anyone think it was wrong?? I trust my DH and feel secure that he wouldn't do anything he shouldn't but I can't stop him from doing it if he really wants to. I also know that being overbearing/jealous/nosey and not allowing him any privacy isn't going to help me unless I'm looking to drive him away! Trust me! I was driven away from a man I cared for very very much because of his insecure behaviors! He drove me crazy and I finally couldn't stand it anymore and left him.

In the end everyone has to do what works for them. I am not here to pass judgment on those that handle it differently from me so I think it's very unfair to assume that those of us who expect a little privacy are wrong, untrustworthy or being unreasonable in our expectations.

JMHO as always. :)
 
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JeanneMarie said:
I'm in the camp that thinks two wrongs don't make a right.

If being in a marriage negates all rights to privacy, then I would have been in trouble a long, long time ago. There is no way I could have stayed around one person for all these years without some things being private. Not that there is anything to hide, but my DH does NOT read my emails. He doesn't have my password and I don't have his.

Of course what she did was wrong. That doesn't make what he did right.

(And for what it's worth, I think it's absurd to prosecute him.)
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Totally agree with ALL of this. I didn't sign my rights away as an individual when I got married 19 years ago. I'm still my own person and expect privacy - and I respect my husband's expectation of privacy as well.

Now, if I thought he were cheating, I'd be ALL OVER trying to find out if that were the case. Although I would hope that my first act would be to simply talk to him about it, rather than do anything sneaky.

First off, a marriage is when 2 people become one, correct?
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I don't view marriage in this way at ALL. That notion sort of weirds me out, actually!
 
I asked a family law attorney friend of mine about this. He said that if the email account was set up as a solo in the husbands name only, then technically it is a federal crime for the wife to access it (or vice versa.) However, if the account was set up jointly, so the name reads "husband and wife's names" in the sender line, then both legally have access to it. It just depends how the original account was set up. Yep, its a crime. Shocking I know, isn't it, especially if you live in the same house and the password is just sitting there right by your jointly shared computer?
Beth
 
Hmmmm... I wonder how he had her password anyway? If she gave it to him, then how is it a problem to look at e-mail?
 
My initial reaction (as a former prosecutor) is that I'd feel very uncomfortable prosecuting this conduct as a felony. I'm not even sure I'd be comfortable with this man being charged with a misdemeanor. It strikes me as conduct that should be addressed in the civil system as a tort for invasion of privacy of some sort. Then she could recover damages (if she can demonstrate any). Criminal charges seem inappropriate to me in these circumstances.
 
Thank you Deborah. Yes I can see a civil proceeding for damages or invasion of privacy or whatever else is applicable but a criminal prosecution just makes the law look silly.
 
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