How old were you . . .

C

Chrissysu

Cathlete
when you had your kids? I've been getting a lot of pressure from family and friends to have a baby, but hubby and I are not quite ready. We are thinking of trying next summer. I will be turning 32 at the end of next summer. Am I getting too old to have my FIRST child? How old were you when you had your kids?

Chrissy
 
Don't ya worry. I waited til I was 30 to have my first, now I'm prego with my second at 32! Don't listen to anybody especially old schoolers. These days it's more common that people aren't ready in their 20's. I think it's beautiful for a 40 year to have a child. So.......

AND just because you'll be 32 does NOT mean it'll be harder to conceive. I had noooooo problem at all. It's just that after 35 you have to get more tests and stuff but it certainly does not mean you're too old!! My FIL is an OB/GYN and we talk about everything, so many people will give you myths and old wives tales, take it with a grain of salt. They really have no idea what they are talking about.

Don't stress, when you're ready it'll happen when it's right;-) ;-)


Mommy to Hannah Lilly born 3.25.05
 
I'm 36 and we're trying for our first. Went to Jamaica with a plan in mind and got pregnant on the first try (with a little help from fertility pee sticks). I just miscarried this week, but with all the encouragement from this group, I am very hopeful that I'll have a healthy pregnancy in the near future. From what I've read, miscarriages are more common than what I thought. If things aren't right then God takes care of it for you.

I didn't meet my DH until 1998 and we were married 09/22/2001. We wanted to be ready financially and emotionally and I guess it just took us longer. I wish we could've started trying earlier, but I think that would've affected our marriage if we had kids too soon. We wanted plenty of time to get to know each other, so our marriage can last a lifetime.

My twin sister met her DH in high school and had her first child at 23, so we're on the oposite ends of the spectrum. She's done having kids and I'm just starting! I wouldn't do anything over though. If my sweetie and I were ready when I was 32 that would've been great, but it's just how things worked out. We hope to have 2 kids and I think we'll be just fine starting now.

You need to have children when you and your husband are ready and don't let others pressure you. We had a lot of pressure, but they stop after a while. Then it will be a great surprise to them when you are pregnant!

Best of luck to you two!
 
Hiya! My hubby & I have been married since I was 25 but I didn't decide to get pregnant till I was 30...I was 31 when our daughter was born. Now I'm 34 and we're expecting again, I'll be 35 when the little rascal comes provided all goes well. This time was a surprise though but we're looking forward to meeting our daughter's little sibling, we think she'll be a wonderful big sister and we're really glad there'll be almost four years between them!

My mum had me (last of three kids) when she was 26. Back in the early seventies the advice was to stop having kids by 30, lol!! Mum & I have had some pretty interesting conversations about how things have changed!!
 
I was 33 when my forst was born, 36 when my second was born. Hubby and I were married 6 years before deciding we were ready for kids. As a result, we are much more patient with our kids and enjoy them more. I am glad we waited.
 
I was 25 when I got married and had my 1st son when I was 29 and my 2nd when I was 32. I think the time to have children is when you are ready , not when people think it is time. I would not rule out having more children so I would be in my mid 30's if I did.
 
I'll be 30 in July and pregnant with my first baby (due any day now). My sister is 34 and trying for her first baby. I've read that after age 35 your risks for certain problems increases compared to younger women, but that the risk itself is still very small.

My dad has three sisters that all had their first child after age 35, and all three had healthy children. One of my aunts just had a baby at age 42 - so don't worry too much about the age factor. I personally feel like I'll be a much better mom at 30 than I would have been at 25.
 
I just miscarried
>this week, but with all the encouragement from this group, I
>am very hopeful that I'll have a healthy pregnancy in the near
>future. From what I've read, miscarriages are more common
>than what I thought. If things aren't right then God takes
>care of it for you.
>


Amhess...so sorry for your loss. I have no children yet, but I feel for you. That is what they say though...if you miscarry it is likely for the best...even though it doesn't feel that way! Anyway, good luck in the future!;-)
 
HI!
I guess I should've added in there, I got married at 25 and always said Kids at 30;-) And I agree a ton with Shopaholic, you are definitly more patient in your 30's, life is different and you see things and tolerate things so much differently.;-)
 
>Amhess...so sorry for your loss. I have no children yet, but I
>feel for you. That is what they say though...if you miscarry
>it is likely for the best...even though it doesn't feel that
>way! Anyway, good luck in the future!;-)


Thanks Janice, it means so much to hear from all of you. My family lives in WI and I'm in IA, so I consider you all part of my 'pseudo' family. There for me when I can't be with my family. The support from everyone here means so much and makes me feel not so alone in this whole thing. Not taking anything away from all that my husband has done...It's just a little different having support of women at this site!

Today is a better day, just waiting for the blood test to hopefully show almost zero so things resume to a somewhat normal state. :)
 
I was 41 when I had my first (and probably only:) ) child. I'm now almost 45 and she's almost 4, and the love of my life. It took about 5 months for me to get pregnant, which is probably longer than it would take a younger person, but my pregnancy was uneventful. I am one of those people who would have been a terrible mother in her 20s or 30s ... I was very immature. DH and I had been married almost 14 years when we decided to try to have a kid. Both our parents almost had a heart attack when we told them we were expecting. I think they had given up on us.
 
Hi Chrissy -
If you and hubby are still not quite ready, don't cave into the pressure. Just because everybody else is ready for you to have a baby doesn't mean YOU are ready. The decision to start a family is solely between you and your dh.

I was 37 when I conceived (after only the second month of trying) and 38 when I delivered my first. She'll be 2 in August. We just recently started for #2 (and probably last). It is taking longer to conceive (longer than 2 months so far) but I'm not panicking. And if I'm meant to only have my one daughter, so be it. She's the world to me.

Yes, the risks associated with pregnancy increase as you age but I believe it is extremely important for you and your husband to be ready for the adventure. It's really no one else's business when you decide to venture down that road.

I know a couple who were married for 10 years before they had their first. I believe she was around 33 or so. Then they didn't have their second one until 5 years later. This couple doesn't and will never cave to outside pressure. No couple should!

Ok, that's my opinion!! Best wishes to you and your hubby.
Diana
 
Dcat and Stebby!
I LOVE your stories:D You'll totally get prego with #2, 2 months is nothin!!!
Good luck and keep us posted;-)


Mommy to Hannah Lilly born 3/25/05
 
Thanks, everyone! Your stories are so inspiring, and they make me feel much better about waiting. I know we are getting close, but just a little while longer would make us feel better.

By the way, does anyone know how old Cathe was when she had her two little ones? Wasn't she in her 30s also?

I talk to my friends who had babies in their 20's because they were "oopsies," but they love having their children now. I'm thankful I time to think about it. Again, thank you so much for your encouraging words. Once I'm pregnant, I'll definitely be back to ask you all advice on exercising among lots and lots of other things! :)

Chrissy
 
Hi Chrissy,

I didn't get married until I was 37. We knew that we couldn't wait too long before having kids but we decided we would wait a year and take our chances. It took us 8 months after that to conceive (with a little help from Clomid) so at 38 I am pregnant with my first. Don't give into pressure. It is your life, not theirs. You still have a few years to enjoy being together alone.
 
R.M.H. dated for 3 months,married at 20, miscarrage at 25, first born at 28, second due febuary 2007 at the age of 33. Still feel like a couple of kids in love. Having kids is the greatest and you never can know how much you will love it until you are eyeball deep in the stuff.
 
>R.M.H. dated for 3 months,married at 20, miscarrage at 25,
>first born at 28, second due febuary 2007 at the age of 33.
>Still feel like a couple of kids in love. Having kids is the
>greatest and you never can know how much you will love it
>until you are eyeball deep in the stuff.


Awww, that is so sweet! Good for you!
:)
 
Okay, I had my baby EARLY! Married at 18, had first baby at 20...however I had my 2nd baby at 28. That's kind of like having TWO first babies. ;)

~Melanie~

Jadon born 11/23/05
Justin born 1/17/04
Jory born 4/9/94

" Take care of your body like it will last a lifetime. Take care of your soul like it will last for eternity"
 
Hi Chrissy.

I did not get pregnant until I was 32 and turned 33 just 2 weeks before my son was born. I am now 34 and my son is just over 1 year old. There is nothing wrong with that! The only potential problem I see is that there is less time to "build" your family if you want more than one child. I always wanted to have had my family "completed" by the time I turned 30 but hey, it just wasn't in the cards for me and that's fine. Do what you gotta do, girl! Don't let 'em rush ya!:)
 
Thanks, Wendy! I always thought I'd be pregnant and done by the time I was 30 also. Are you planning on having more kids?

Chrissy
 
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