Got a really odd question

What's going on with his son that it's more important than your health? Is his son's health at risk too? If not, then yeah, he needs a swift kick in the pants to wake him up out of the selfish mode he's in.

{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}

I hope everything will turn out alright.

Take care:)


Carrie
 
Hi, Christine,

I don't have any advice for you...just well wishes, prayers and cyber hugs.

Take care,

bhappy
 
A quick overview here – DS is into drugs and has had 5 DUI’s. He went to rehab and once he was out moved back in with us at 23. Within two weeks he was back to drinking and drugs. DH and I have been arguing over whether or not DS (and believe me D is not dear) should live with us, especially with the two younger girls. Saturday was the clincher with DS even stepping in to offer his opinion of me.

I want to thank everyone for the support. I am feeling MUCH better and stronger this morning.

Yve - Bless you for sharing that with me. I’m sorry you had to go through that. How scary! I’m glad to know you’re all right now! I will tell my dad if it’s anything major, but until I know, I do not want to needlessly worry him. I really appreciate your sharing your story with me. HUGS!!!

Clare – I agree with your approach. For the next few weeks, until I know, I’m going to do what is best for me. Whatever happens to me and DH has to wait for a future date. I can deal with his not speaking to me. Thanks – I really see the wisdom in what you say.

Mattea, Carole and Judy – I PM’d you back, sister Cheetahs! What a great group I run with!

Susan – Another Cheetah- I’m so sorry you went through all of that. I cannot even imagine the pain of wanting a child and not being able to have one. You are so strong and so sweet. I really admire you!

Carrie – thanks! No, DS is healthy (well, physically so far, his habits will catch up to him). Right now, I think I’ll hire my old Krav instructor to deliver the kick – it’ll hurt more… :+

BHappy – HUGS back to you! Thanks! Hugs and prayers are very appreciated!
 
Christine - I just wanted to send some hugs and prayers your way and hope everything works out for you. As someone who has lived through an ex-husband who drank and did drugs, I would definitely not want DS moving in. I thankfully got out of my marriage when my kids were toddlers and before they saw my ex get too out of control. This is not a good environment for your two younger girls. I really feel for you. Good luck. Even though your DH is being selfish right now, at least you have all of us for support.

Marcy
 
Christine,

Big hugs to you during such a stressful time! I don't know the details of your situation with your DH (I sort of just came back to the boards) but I do know that no matter what the argument, in my opinion, this situation with your health should take a front seat. Certainly any other issue can be put to rest for the time being.

There is also the idea that men react differently to these things than women. Generally, I think that men wait until the true diagnosis to decide it is time to worry. We are thinkers, worriers and information gatherers. They just wait for someone to feed them the facts and the remedy. I remember a time when my pap came back with an issue and they asked me to do a second one. I absolutely freaked out and I just could not believe that my ex-bf was watching tv, ignoring me, going about his evening, etc. When I finally screamed at him about it, he said "Christine, you don't even know exactly what is up until you take the second test. It's not time to worry." Perhaps your husband is similiar in his thinking.

>Christine: think short term and think "myself" for a while
>here. Leave the larger issues of "what will happen to this
>relationship?" to later when you have the energy to deal with
>them and when you can gain perspective upon the whole
>situation, once it has played itself out.

This is GREAT advice! You worry about you and take care of you right now. Everything else will wait.

Good luck...I am crossing fingers for your next tests.
 
Christine, I know that I am VERY late in hopping on here, but I wanted to say that I think that you are a very lovely person and I will pray for you through all of this. GREAT BIG HUGS to you, wonderful woman!

Missy
 
Christine,

I haven't been around much and just saw your post.

Please take care of YOURSELF and know you are in my prayers.

{{{{{{{{{{{{CHRISTINE}}}}}}}}}}}
 
Thanks everyone! It's funny how when you've been on this forum there are certain people you learn you can count on to be there for you. Every single one of them repsonded here. Melody just put the capper on it. There are some absolutely incredible, wonderful women on this board, and I am truly proud to be a part of y'all.

I did want to give an update. Wednesday night, DH went out with friends. He came home around 8PM (late night for him, but we're early birds) and I noticed a change. Didn't think too much about it until the next day when I received an email from him letting me know that if I need him all I have to do is ask and he'll be there. Oh yeah, I about fell over. Evidently he was complaining to his friends (who know me as well) and they, MEN (there is hope for the human race :+), ripped into him, telling him that my health was way more important than some petty feud about his son, who everyone knows has issues. They told him that he deserves to lose me if he is stupid enough not to be there absolutely for me right now. Bless them. Of course, now I cannot get upset if he spends to much time with the boys... :p
 
Wow! You guys have some great friends! There is hope for the male race :)

Good luck Christine with everything

((((((hugs))))))))


Rosie
 
Great googly, how did I miss this??

Christine, I can't add anything to what everyone else has said. I'm sending you great big huge hugs and want to let you know that if you ever need to vent, we're all here.

You know, I keep trying to articulate thoughts here, but nothing is coming out right, so suffice to say that I think you're an amazing, wonderful woman and anything you need, you only have to ask:)
 
Why am I not surprised that they ripped into him?? ;)

Men may be different from us in a lot of ways, but when it's comes down to it, they generally know right from wrong and have hearts just like we do. I'm just glad your DH was able to hear them. That's what impresses me. :D

Nancy
 
Christine,

I'm just now reading your post. First of all I just want to say you are in my prayers. I hope that all of your tests come out just fine.

I'm glad your DH has had a change of heart. It made me cry to read your post about his turnaround. I'm just so happy for you!

Hang in there!

Suz

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." - Anatole France

http://www.picturetrail.com/dogs2birds
 
"Thanks everyone! It's funny how when you've been on this forum there are certain people you learn you can count on to be there for you. Every single one of them repsonded here. Melody just put the capper on it. There are some absolutely incredible, wonderful women on this board, and I am truly proud to be a part of y'all."

Christine: you are so welcome :)

And thank heavens for his friends! I had no idea the issues with his son were so bad. Quite honestly, your DH should go down on bended knee to you that you are even prepared to continue to deal with his son. I only hope that he stepped in to defend you when his son spoke against you. You do not deserve rough treatment from a young man with so many DUIs. He is not just risking his own life when he drinks but that of other innocent drivers and passengers out there. Your DH should be throwing the book at him. What would he do if it were you and your other children who were injured when his son was behind the wheel?

Oh god, don't get me started on drunk drivers......

Clare
 
Christine-not sure how i missed this post (arghh). I am so happy to hear things have worked out with dh and he's came to his senses and made the right decision to stand by the most important person in his life, his wife. (((((hugs))))) to you.
 
Christine,

I am so glad that you now feel some support from DH!
I know your test are coming up, so I'm sending more hugs and prayers.

Take care,

bhappy
 
Me, too, Christine!! I'm VERY glad you both have friends like those. Sheesh. Someone knew to give him a wakeup call and I'm very glad he listened!

Let me know if you ever need a physical hug, too, and I'll be there. ;)
 
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