getting over a breakup

A

akizora

Cathlete
About how long do you think it takes to get over a break-up? Let's say the couple knew each other for a year, were on friendly terms but not really friends, got together over about a one month period, were in a 3 -month relationship, then he broke it off, very graciously, because he just wasn't feeling it. And she is heartbroken because she really liked him, and has no motivation to do anything at all and can't eat or sleep much at all. How long do you think before she gets back to basically normal, where she thinks about him without getting upset, or can go a whole day without dwelling on it? Maybe 1/2 the length of the relationship? Less? More? Any rules of thumb here?
Amy:+
 
I don't think there's a mathematical formula you can apply here. I think it totally depends on the personality. Some people might take a few weeks, other people, months.
 
I agree with Shelley. I had a friend who I simply adored but he did not feel the same way. It took a while before I could think of him and not hurt. Just keep in mind that it does get better. It really, truly does. I promise. I'm sorry you're feeling this now. {{{HUGS}}}
 
I'm so sorry, I've been there....I'm sure most of us have been there. There will come a day when all of a sudden you realize you feel a little better. It's grief, nothing to do but go through the motions of life. If it's a friend that's going through this, it's good to give her space to feel the sadness and slowly bring her out to participate in normal daily things. If it's you, it's okay to feel the sadness but don't allow it to overtake you. Just keep doing things that you normally do. Don't spend too much time watching television at home.
Good luck
Heather
 
The timing of this is definitely an individual thing. There are so many factors that come into play like who you are, what you do, who he was, the relationship you had with him, the surprise factor in the breakup, your past relationships, etc.

My 9 year relationship ended about a year ago. We had been in bad shape for a while before that, which I think made me more ready than I would have been. It's now a year later and I am a new woman (and have been for many months now).

Sometimes the ending of one relationship opens up another relationship, or another part of life, that is amazing & wonderful. It's a new beginning, so try to think about it that way and you will smile again very soon.

Good luck :)
 
Wow Christine - I really like how you put that

"Sometimes the ending of one relationship opens up another relationship, or another part of life, that is amazing & wonderful. It's a new beginning, so try to think about it that way and you will smile again very soon."

I think it's important that it's sometime another part of life and not necessarily a new relationship... anyhow very well put :)

Amy - sorry to hear you are hurting so much. Like others say it will get better.
 
What's the lyric...."Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end" Look at it as someone stepping aside so the right one can come along.
 
>I think it's important that it's sometime another part of life
>and not necessarily a new relationship... anyhow very well put

Thanks :) I really find this to be true!

Amy, how are you doing? If you ever need to chat, please write to me. I feel like an expert in this field, given my last year's experience (haha!) and certainly would lend an ear! My email is [email protected]
 
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