Gender--To know or not to know?

M

Manmohini

Cathlete
Hi Ladies,
What are your thoughts? Next week, I go for a sono (18 weeks), at which point the gender of the child will be discernible. At first, I was deadset against knowing, as I wanted to be surprised and figured the surprise element could be a real incentive during labor. Now I'm not so sure.

Granted, it's different for every woman, but which do you think is better--to know or not to know?
Manmohini
 
I don't understand this question. I mean, isn't the process of finding out a surprise no matter if that occurs at delivery or week 20? I don't get WHY parents wait? Seems like that just makes it more difficult to adjust. Unless you just want to do it the "natural" way.....

I will be finding out only because no way could my husband survive w/o knowing. I probably could but no way he could!! He wants a boy, but of course would be happy with a boy or girl. I tell him, "Well, it if is a girl you can't blame me bucko". Since it is ALL him. ;)

What sex are you hoping for Manmohini?
 
Actually, whatever and whoever comes is fine by me. Same with husband. We have no preference about gender.
Manmohini
 
Hi,

I found out with my first two, which was really nice because one was a boy, one was a girl so I was able to plan accordingly. My family and friends had fun getting gender appropriate items for my first two. It was fun finding out and planning.

I chose not to find out with my 3rd, and I have to say I'm so glad I had the surprise when I had the baby.

I think I actually preferred waiting to find out during delivery rather than finding out ahead of time.

Not sure if I'm helping much with your decision, but really you can't lose either way:)

If you chose not to find out, there are plenty of gender neutral items like bedding, clothes, etc. for baby that are adorable.

Good luck with your pregnancy and congratulations to you!! ;)
Stacey

Ryan born 1/2/07
Emma born 4/27/03
Alex born 9/7/01
 
Such a personal and individual choice. I did not find out last time
nor will I or did I this time. Just my opinion finding out at the
time of delivery is like nothing else. It is the whole process
my hubby and I love. I will never forget the momement when the
mid wife said ," Its a girl!" I was over the moon and would be if
a boy. Sex did not /does not matter to us. Granted finding out
would not have put a damper on my birthing experience but it
for me would take away from the surprise. I am 32 weeks now
and still just as exicted to know the sex but again love the
element of surprise. I think most people do want to know but
obviously not everyone!

Good Luck to you!

Jennifer Claire 12/24/05
? 8/10/07.
 
My husband and I waited for both. We have a girl and a boy. When all was said and done, finding out the gender at delivery was something to look forward to (along with hearing my baby cry!). We thought for #2 we would find out sooner but decided we enjoyed not knowing with our first so much that we waited again and we're so glad we did. After #1 we realized there is still plenty of time after the baby arrives to do and plan for things (like setting up the nursery, etc.) I guess we're more laid back about stuff like that than some people. Whatever your decision it will be right for you. Follow your heart!
 
We waited until delivery and it was certainly great incentive to push harder so that I could find out what it was!!! Once I saw her little face, I was so glad that I waited!!!

But, it is such a personal choice. I have friends who were so happy that they found out because they feel that they bonded more before birth and then there are other friends who waited also.

Whichever you decide, it will be fun either way!!!

Good luck!!!
 
I'm due in 12 weeks, and we found out at 22 weeks. We decided from the start that we wanted to know, and I don't regret it. It has given a personality to my little kicker! We're having a girl, and it is really fun for family members to know ahead of time. People have donated all kinds of girl stuff since we told everyone. I think people have donated more to us BECAUSE they know we are having a girl, so all the old girl "hand-me-downs" are offered when other people's babies get older. It's been nice. DH and I have hardly bought anything at this point.

And trust me . . .I'll still be pushing with all my might at delivery time. I'll be sooooo ready to deliver!!!!

Chrissy
 
We found out with both of our children. We were supposed to have two boys...however, I gave birth to a baby girl on May 9th. They were 90% sure it was going to be a boy, but we were pleasantly surprised to find out she was NOT a boy! It didn't matter to us what we had, but the surprise factor was unbelievable.
 
I'm 36 weeks pregnant with girl #3. We found out the sex ahead of time during all of our pregnancies. All 3 girls were named before birth and it made decorating the nursery more exciting. Whatever you chose will be right for you. Good luck!:)
 
Thanks ladies for all of your thoughtful input. I really wanted to wait, but I blew it this morning. When the tech asked me if I wanted to know, I told her that my husband decided he wanted to know but that I was still on the fence. So I told her no. A few minutes later when she was examining the genital area, she asked again, and I was burning with curiosity so I blurted out "yes." So now I know. I must say I'm thrilled to be having a son.
Manmohini
 
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