Dating site question

[Faithnveggies]

What are some nice ways to respond to flirts or messages from people you are not interested in getting to know?
I think if someone has made the effort to say hi, especially if they wrote a personal message, they deserve an acknowledgement. Sometimes you just want to say thanks but no thanks in a friendly way that doesn't take 15 minutes to compose.

 

[story1267]

Jody, that happened to me a few times when I was doing match.com.

What I tried to do is say something like, "Thanks for contacting me and I appreciate your time. I don't think that we'd make a good match but you seem like a nice person - best of luck to you!"

Something simple but on the lines of thanks but no thanks.

Take care.

 

[Faithnveggies]

Thanks, Suzanne, that sounds perfect.

 

[story1267]

In the interest of full disclosure I think I need to confess that the more I think about this line the more I think that maybe it was first used ON me by someone who didn't like my response to his first contact email. But then I stole it and used it for myself!!

I have to thank that guy, and all the others I met and didn't like or didn't even meet, or met and liked but couldn't make something work because I'm so happy with the guy I did find.

Happy hunting! :7

 

[newswoman13]

Well, if it's confession time, I just don't reply if I'm not interested! You all are a lot nicer than me I guess...

But, seriously, if I'm a little interested, I'll reply, and it typically goes to a few emails, etc. Then, it might fizzle or lead to a date, etc.

But, if I'm totally uninterested and don't reply, it's usually because either a) I'm really busy and forget, or b) the person wrote an idiotic email...sometimes they just don't even deserve the time and attention!

When it happens to me, I remind myself that we're all human and who knows why he didn't respond. His loss!

To add to this discussion, I've gotten A LOT pickier since I've been online on and off for about a year. This time, I opted for match.com's "6-month Guarantee", so if I don't meet someone, I have another six months for free! Good buy -- I'm in no rush!

Best of luck ~ Please share any fun stories!

:+

 

[mtnmom99]

If you are on Match.com, if you hit the reply to say "No thanks", it gives 3 options which are stated very politely. They are:

1. Thanks for writing to me, but I've just met someone and want to see how it develops.

2. Thanks for writing to me, but I've decided to take a break from dating for now.

3. Thanks for writing to me, but unfortunately, we're just not a good match. Good luck in your search!

It comes across in an e-mail and it's clear that a canned remark is used. I think Match give you some sort of encouragement that if you keep looking, the right one is there for you.

Okay, ya, I got one the other day. Dang! I rarely write the guy, and he was two hours away, but seemed very compatable. His answer was #1, that he met someone (but that makes me wonder why you don't make your profile "invisible"). Oh well, I'm not bothered by it really. Better than being ignored.

Diane

 

[patricia024]

I've always clicked on the "No Thanks" and then "option #3" if I'm not interested.

I just had another date yesterday with someone I had met on Match. We ended up inline skating for 13 miles; later, a dinner/movie.

I'm a lot more picky with who I date after being on Match. I just got out of a long-distance, 10-month relationship in June.

Patti

 

[Faithnveggies]

Thanks, I've saved the responses. I am on fitness-singles.com, not Match. I am sort of saving that site for when I am more serious about dating. My current guy friend is pretty clear he isn't interested in LTR or commitment, but we have fun together and I'm half crazy about him. It's just right for now. That being said, I have met someone from fitness who is adding CONFUSION to the mix.

Oh and as far as being picky, ITA. When I started, I was pretty open to anyone who seemed compatible, but why put the energy into something that has no potential for chemistry? For me that turned out to be a waste of everyone's time and money with much more potential for hurt feelings.

And Why oh WHY don't people use spell check??? PLEASE learn the difference between "your" and you're", at least in your front page profile!

 

[story1267]

Jody, that cracks me up with the spell check thing. I would actually never respond to any guy who was so lazy he couldn't turn off his caps lock.

I used to be very picky also about things like bad spelling and terrible grammar.

But then, I met my BF, who is an engineer, scary smart, but will be the first to admit his spelling is poor.

And I used to be picky about "type" as in I wanted a short, stocky guy who would be cuddly. BF is classic ectomorph, over 6' tall, long and lean. I guess you can't tell cuddly from looks alone!