Thanks to all of you for the response! Morningstar...I love what you said about learning to love your arms in the meantime. I hear that so much...learn to love yourself. But HOW do you go about changing your mental image and self-talk? I am truly working on that at this moment. I mean, do I read books? Do I make little self-affirming post-it notes? I don't know how to start thinking differently. I am s-t-u-c-k!
its a process, everyday when you start to think negative you have to find something positive. stop comparing yourself to others. you can admire but to want to achieve what they have is impossible. we are genetically all different. even though i do cathe and variety of workouts i don't think i will EVER look exactly like cathe(ie her abs) b/c of my genetics,medical history, and diet. i just tend to be the body type that stores their fat around the middle even though i am not overweight you can tell my abs are a little flabby but it took me TEN YEARS to get where i am now(with surgeries,illness, and life making me have rest stops along the way i just get back on the road)it could take me another ten years to get where i wanted to be. i have relaxed myself on my looks though. my husband loves my looks now more then we were first together. and i try to judge myself for what i can accomplish rather then what i look like. its hard but everyday take time. do a journal, try a new workout, push a workout a little harder something to challenge you mentally that will take your focus over how you look.
anyway even though i am self conscious about my abs, i have to remember i have STRONG shoulders,STRONG legs the ability to run around like the superwoman i can be on days without being winded. my back issues aren't nearly as painful or bothering as they were before etc. i am a real woman, a real mother raising a special needs child. i need to be healthy and not worrying about looking perfect. i find when i quit focusing on looks, the results come. if i worry about my health, how i am feeling my energy level that motivates me. those pictures were when i was doing most of my daughter's therapy on my own. that was stressful so i used advanced workouts bootcamp/circuit style mostly b/c i didn't have time but i took my stress out on the workout and obviously that worked!! i lost it when i went back to work and the stresses were still there but everyday i treat as a new day to try again. i am sure i will be stressed today but i will take it to the gym and run it off.
intensity over time, pushing my strength to the limit, and leaving it at the gym will help me get results but i don't think about it. and when i do i just divert my thoughts to something else. my abs or cellulite do not define me as a person. if that is all ppl are going to look at on me then they are missing out on someone who is going to love a person for who they are.
i bet you are a fun person to talk to, i bet you have great qualities that make you a caring friend and great advice giver so define yourself as that. you are working on the rest but don't dwell on it. focus on where you were before you started working out to where you are now. i know for me i used to never be able to do certain yoga poses while know i can do many(minus the lotus and headstand LOL) but the time and dedication it took for me to get there. i used to never be able to even lift one 20lb weight and i am hauling 20,25,30s dumbbells and bang out 3-4 sets. just reprogram your thinking. if you think finding a book will help go on ahead but i don't think you NEED too.
oh btw all this is from therapy. i didn't have a great childhood(never received counseling or closure so been walking around pissed off for 31 years) and compounded with the challenges of a special needs child and a marriage to somebody from the same childhood background made this extra challenging. we sought help and learning these techniques i found go into all areas of life. be it low self esteem b/c of abuse, bullying from peers, loosing weight, etc. simple techniques in word but a no so simple in action but its time and practice. allow yourself to slip b/c we all make mistakes but get up dust off and try it again.
kassia
In any case the diet worked better.
