Am I over reacting or just pmsing????

[gidget1978]

Good question hey?

DD had a friend sleepover last night and she is a yr older then DD,so she as another group of friends.
They wanted to go watch a hockey game today at 11 and I would just drop them off.DH was going to be up there so it was no big deal.
DD comes downstairs and say "mom can we pick up Hailey to"? I don't even know who Hailey is.I didn't want to be hard to get along with so we did.
While DD's friend ran into Haileys house to grab her, I said "whose idea was this anyway"? She said, "she called her asked her if she wanted to come". I said,"so she called Hailey and told her I would pick her up before you even asked me"? She said, "yeah".
Now..I don't have any time for this kind of stuff.You make due when your own child tries to pull a fast one, but when someone elses child does this then it kinda gets under my skin.I have been the last few years telling DD that you don't invite people to do things unless you ask me first...then you ask the child.You always check with me first.
So, I think I am pmsing so it kinda got to me a little more then it normally would.I no I could have said no but I didn't want to embrass DD.So now I was responsible for picking this strange kid up, (I might add I don't like being responsible for other people children) and then take her back home again.
I think the other thing that sort of bothers me is the little girl that slept here is a good kid but she is a yr older and is starting to get bit of a "tude" so I heard her on the phone yesterday talking to her dad and she was pretty much yelling at him.I don't want DD to start acting like her either.
I thought it was a bit much for someone to offer my services without checking with MOI first.
Now tell me...do I need to go back to bed and hope to wake up in a better mood or is what I am feeling normal?
Lori

 

[sparrow]

Lori, I don't think you are overreacting or PMSing. It's extremely presumptuous of a child to arrange an adult's schedule! Pretty nervy if you ask me x( . Especially if you are doing your best to teach your own DD the right way to behave, and then she sees her friends acting the way you're telling her not to, and getting away with it.

IMO, your feelings are right on the money!

Sparrow


Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow - what a ride!’ — Peter Sage

 

[Bobbi]

You are peeved, Lori and I think I would be too. There's nothing more precious than time and only those closest to me may squanderr mine without FIRST getting permission. My kids ask and try to give advance notice so we can all do what we need to do, get where we need to be and back again. You let one slide but let it be known that that won't happen again. You know the old adage, give them an inch and they will take a mile.
Bobbi "Chicks rule!"http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-032.gif
Tell me what you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/linie/smiley-linie-009.gif

 

[gidget1978]

Oh thats so true.They (she) will just try to get away with it again the next time.
I could see her "asking" if she already had plans to do something with this other little girl today and then calling her.But not purposely calling her to tell her we will pick her up without checking first.
DD is well aware of how I feel b/c I told her.I don't think she will let this happen again.
I guess the other thing I thought about to was DD being ignored once the other two older girls got together.
Glad to hear I am not pmsing DH thought it was a bit much to.
Lori

 

[delfin]

You're not pmsing. It's all about respect and courtesy, and, as we all know, lots of people (kids included, of course), don't have any. My DD has a friend who also has alot of "tude," and I can't even believe how whe talks to her parents (who are friends of mine). My blood boils when I hear some of the stuff that comes out of her mouth. (In fact I'm getting mad right now just thinking about it!) My DD knows that she's never to talk to me like that. If she comes close, I simply tell her that she's crossing the line and begin disrespectful, and I've explained to her that they'll be a consequence when she has crossed that line (curtailing outings, sleepovers, that kind of thing). It's hard when you think that another kid may be influencing yours in a bad way, but you've got to stick to your guns and hope that your values are influencing them more.

 

[Soosan]

I think you're right on the money too. Before you posted about the two girls ignoring your daughter, I was wondering if that had happened. Good thing you've ingrained manners and respect in your daughter. This girl certainly does not seem to have any.

 

[nancy324]

I'm not a Mom, but I'll throw my two cents in. I agree with the other posters. You are absolutely right to be miffed, and I think your reaction is dead on.

It is so hard to be a parent! I know my little nephew just started hanging out with a kid my brother and SIL don't like, and it is SOOO difficult. They try so hard to handle it just right, but I can see that parenting is the most difficult job in the world.

Lots of luck!
-Nancy

 

[melodygirl]

Lori

As a mom of 4 boys from age 25 down to 8 - you are 100% "appropriate" in what you felt. Selfishness is not an admirable trait in anyone. Selfish, inconsiderate children grow into selfish, inconsiderate adults.

 

[gidget1978]

Thanks Ladies, you guys are always on my side
Now, that I am not "crusty" anymore I to realized that I was right in how I felt and DH backing me up also made me realize it.I usually get crabby about a week before my period so thats what yesterday was all about.
Next time she tries to pull a fast one, I don't think I am going to go along with the plan.But DD knew how I felt.So Im sure she will let her know the next time.
And I am not saying that my DD is an angel...cause she is not.But I have seen a few actions that her friend has and we also notice when she spends to much time with her, Jaynas attitude changes as well, and not for the better.And she isn't a bad kid but the bad things she does do...DD wants to do them to.I guess she thinks its cool! Who Knows?
Lori

 

[pink_fortitude]

You already know this, but you are in the right. I would be more cautious around this girl and make sure I asked alot of questions the next time, if there is a next time. I can't believe how some parents let their kids talk to them. I am tempted to spank her daddy with the paddle my principle used on me! I assure you, it would knock some sense into him.

Missy