Seeking advice on workouts when grieving

H

Hazlady

Cathlete
I had to put my beloved little tabby cat down today. She was 18.5 years old and developed a very aggressive tumour in her nasal passage and started showing symptoms 8 weeks ago. She was starting to lose quality of life so I had to make the difficult decision before she started really suffering. It has been just me and her for the last 15 years, after I broke up with my ex, so it is just me now and I have a massive hole in my life. I can't eat or sleep properly and haven't felt like working out. There is no way I could complete a standard Cathe workout right now as I just feel too weak. Working out is important for me as I am Type 2 diabetic and exercise is an important part of my management strategy. I was hoping someone could tell me how they coped in a similar situation, what kind of workouts they did while grieving and how they got back into a normal workout routine.

Simonne
 
Oh Hazlady, I am so sorry.......I read your post and my heart broke for you.....I am in a similar situation,
unfortunately and I feel your pain. In March, I had to make a decision like you for my little Coco, my little
doggie, He was almost 19 yrs old, I rescued him 14 yrs ago, when he was about 5. Just me & him all these
years and my life was built completely around him. His health started declining a couple years ago and
because of his age, any major things were not an option so I did the best I could with and for him but things
just got worse. I didn't want him to hurt, etc and he had more bad days instead of good. I am lost, and feel
that I don't have a "purpose" any longer if that makes sense. Since the middle of March, there hasn't been
a day that I haven't cried and hurt. I did get back to working out, cause it helps to take my mind off of
my sorrow, but to be honest, it doesn't "feel the same" to me. I still feel like I am in shock, if that makes
sense. Just hang in there, do the best you can......
 
I'm so sorry Hazlady, I really feel for you and your pain at loosing your beloved cat. I also know how painful your decision to do the best for your kitty's quality of life must have been.

Would it be possible for you to walk outside even if it's only for 10 or 15 minutes? If not, perhaps there's a Cathe Live or OnDemand or DVD workout, one of the shorter ones, that makes you smile and feel good normally? Pushing yourself when your heart feels crushed and your stomach is clenched can be incredibly difficult; maybe just do a part of a workout or a section of one that you most enjoy, i.e., if you like step or kickboxing or bootcamp, etc. maybe you could just do the warm-up or maybe 5 or 10 min. to see how you feel.
I don't know. Try not to be hard on yourself.

I feel so bad for you...
Stephanie
 
I feel for you both ... I've lost two long-time feline companions & it is tough. I suggest being kind & compassionate toward yourselves as you are grieving long-term relationships with companions who offered unconditional love. I recommend taking walks, especially in nature if possible, and especially during the intense grieving period. Maybe add some yoga or stretching. Peace will gradually, eventually, return to your hearts. You'll always miss them, but the pain will become less intense as time passes.
 
Awe I'm so sorry you lost your furbaby. When I was grief stricken I found videos with lots of reps and little or no weights were good for me then I kind of zoned out if i had to but felt the burn. The tonique videos were great for that or cathe's turbo Barre, the legs dvd from the fit tower series or Essentrics videos.
Take it easy on yourself. Hugs to you.
 
Thanks Aqua Girl, 1nortell, Debinmi and Jamie Vaughn for your kind words and suggestions.

Aqua Girl, so sorry about Coco and like you my life was built around my cat Tammy. She was also a rescue that I got from the shelter when she was 1 year old. One small blessing of being locked down due to Covid is that I haven't had to travel for work so was able to spend the last few months at home with her.

Walking outside is not really possible at the moment. It is winter here in NZ and over the last 3 days we have had some heavy rain, strong, cold winds and more thunderstorms forecast for today. I also just can't seem to get enough food into me to fuel me through even a short workout at the moment. 1nortell, you're right, my stomach does feel clenched. Maybe in a little while I'll be able to do some light workouts.

Simonne
 
((Hugs)) so very sorry for your loss of your dear Tammy.

I found just free-flow movement to 'release' the hurt to music I like (nothing sad or too slow) is very helpful.
Walking/hiking works in theory, but then seeing everyone out walking their pet/buddy gave me a sense of heaviness, so I stopped for a bit. Not everybody is like this obviously.
Try youtube searches for QiGong Grief, qi gong grief, qi gong trauma. Many great instructors on there. Moreso now I think since so many of us around the world are grieving.
This is a pretty good channel https://www.youtube.com/user/TheTruth427

If you aren't sleeping, I would just say to not overdo anything physical and if it keeps up for more than 3 weeks or so, consider speaking with a doctor.
 
Thanks Elsie.
I have been taking Pro Supps Crash formula to help me sleep. It is a sleep and recovery formula. One dose tends to carry over for 2-3 nights so I only need to take it 2-3 times a week. I've also started exercising again but only short workouts.
 
Hazlady said:
I had to put my beloved little tabby cat down today. She was 18.5 years old and developed a very aggressive tumour in her nasal passage and started showing symptoms 8 weeks ago. She was starting to lose quality of life so I had to make the difficult decision before she started really suffering. It has been just me and her for the last 15 years, after I broke up with my ex, so it is just me now and I have a massive hole in my life. I can't eat or sleep properly and haven't felt like working out. There is no way I could complete a standard Cathe workout right now as I just feel too weak. Working out is important for me as I am Type 2 diabetic and exercise is an important part of my management strategy. I was hoping someone could tell me how they coped in similar situation, what kind of workouts they did while grieving and how they got back into a normal workout routine.

Simonne
Click to expand...

I am so sorry, Simone. It hurts so much to lose a beloved pet. I lost my 13 year old pit bull/lab mix in late March. I had to have him put down due to lung cancer. It was awful

You have been beaten down by a lot and sound very depressed. I get exactly like you when stressed. I stopped working out for a while. Do half of a workout until you build back up which I am sure will be quickly.

When my little brother died in 2015 and my best friend was killed that same year I did Cathe. I did my favotite ones. That one 45 to 60 min workout became my safe place. Don't beat yourself up. Do a workout you really love maybe a short premix instead of an entire workout. I don't know about you but when I do a Cathe workout I literally can take myself out of my bad situation. It is like I am in the studio with them.

I have worked out while crying but has always been cathartic.

I am so so sorry about your fur baby. It is like losing a biological family member. Please take care. Somewhere out there there is another angel who needs a home. I am waiting for my angel right now. She/He has not come to me yet but I know the pet will. If it is a boy I am naming him River. If I have a girl I am thinking about Riviera.

Sending my love and prayers your way,

Amy
 
Thanks or sharing Amy. So sorry for your losses of your brother and friend only a few years ago and now your dog. That's a lot to deal with.

For me the truly awful part was making that decision to euthanize her. It was my responsibility to make that decision and I didn't want to rob her of quality time but also didn't want her to suffer. It was the hardest decision I've ever made. In the end I made the right decision at the right time. She had a few days of eating her favourite foods and lazing in the sun and when the time came she went really peacefully.

My stomach isn't as clenched up and I am able to eat better meals now although my appetite hasn't fully returned to normal yet. I'm sleeping OK and I have started exercising again. I actually find heavy weight lifting is good as I have to really focus on weight selection and lifting with good form and I really enjoyed Cathe's new Live Burn Set upper body workouts. I've also started back at work again but only part time as I find it hard to focus. I'm self employed and have one main client that I contract to. They know what I'm going through and have been very supportive.

Like you I know one day there will be another angel for me to save and take in when the time is right. For now I have to go through the grieving process, take care of myself and reset so I will be ready for a new addition and that is what is keeping me going.

Simonne
 
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