Help! I am so depressed!

Bobbi

Bobbi

Cathlete
My plantar facsiitis is still not under control. I can barely walk, let alone do anything more active. I feel drowsy most of the day and can barely function. I saw my handsome podiatrist but I am not sure where it is going. This has been going on for 6 months. I have $675.00 worth of orthotics. I have done physical therapy and 3 cortisone shots! I feel so depressed! I joined the Y to ride the recumbant bike and strength train but I am so worried that this injury will not go away! I have always been a good healer and very active so I am at my wits end. Please give me that positive feedback! I haven't gained any weight--even lost a couple of pounds. As I cracked to the x-ray tech today thank heavens for my eating disorder tendenacies or I'd be blowing up like a balloon! The thing is, it's not that far from the truth but it's the depression, I think. I can barely stand to put food in my mouth. I am turning forty on Wednesday but I feel like I am twenty again. Back in the days when I was neurotic and stupid! I am fretful, and scared, really unlike myself. I want my endorphins! I want my good health and strength! I like being a cheerleader but I have been so despondant, I rarely post and can hardly bear to read through the posts and, god forbid, I can'tt do the new workouts when they come! Help! Help! Help!

http://www.plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif Chick's Rule! B http://www.plaudersmilies.de/natur/petals.gif bbi
 
[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON Dec-14-02 AT 01:28AM (Est)[/font][p]

Bobbi,
You have probably done this but here are some articles on P.F. on the web.

http://www.spinalhealth.net/inj-plant.html

http://heelspurs.com/index.html

http://www.intelli.com/vhosts/aossm-isite/html/main.cgi?sub=125&cooked=428450-UU[GP-IT&prof=&origsite=http://www.intelli.com/vhosts/aossm-isite&origcount=&origsub=125&origloc=main.cgi&prof=&sub=125
Whoa, that last one is a long one! Somehow I can't remove the letters after the number 125.

The last URL ends with the number 125.

Bobbi, take it slow and treat yourself like you are the patient and you are the elite athlete's sports medicine orthopedic specialist! Work your way up to the workouts and just do what is best for yourself. Be a good patient for yourself!

One of your cheerleaders
 
Hi Bobbi!

Let's try this again...I just posted a long post to you and lost it somehow??? Oh boy!

I just wanted to say thay I am thinking of you also. Your words to Sherry were so very kind. I thought I had noticed you weren't posting as much. I haven't been able to get here as much as usual, but have missed hearing from you. I TRY to keep up on what is going on with everyone. I just wanted you to know that I suffered with a bout of PF also some time ago and thought it would NEVER go away. I finally took 10 weeks off of ALL workouts involving ANY type of impact. It was very depressing, so I can relate with you on that. I also feel like I started seeing some remarkable recovery after I decided to faithfully stretch my heels lower then a step (no bouncing) 4-5X/day. Not sure if it was coincidental, but it sure seemed to help. I am not sure the extent of your injury? Did the Dr. tell you to stretch? I know I have not helped at all but wanted you to know I am thinking of you too. Like we told Sherry, come here ANY time you need to talk or a shoulder to cry on. I'll be praying for your healing too. Keep us posted. Thinking of you!

Your-Friend-In-Fitness, DebbieH http://www.plaudersmilies.de/wavey.gif If You Get The Choice To Sit It Out Or Dance...I Hope You DANCE!!!
 
Hi Bobbi:

I am sorry to hear this injury is plaguing you for so long. I know what you mean about missing the endorphin fix, and i am concerned by your perhaps erratic eating, that it might escalate into something else.

It may take a little while to heal completely. You yourself deep down must know and want that complete healing, right? Because you don't want to go down this road again in another few months' time. It may require adopting a different mind set in order to get through this and still have a handle on your emotions. And I know I am not the best person to talk about this because I'd be s**t at it myself, I'm currently going ballistic because I haven't managed to work out for a week! Pretty ironic.

You say you can't walk. OK, that's impact. So, at least be reassured that you have intelligently sought out sources of exercise that you can do: the bike and weight training. And, you know, with just these two, you can maintain a seriously strong level of fitness, maybe even reach different levels in your fitness than before because of the different nature of the activities. The endorphin high will then surely come as you get even more profficient at the bike and strive for new levels to reach in your training. So, perhaps set yourself different goals and let a sense of pride and achievement flood you by reaching those and moving on to conquering new ones.

I have said this before in different posts to different people but I am usually ignored for it, because it's the last thing an Interval max fan wants to hear but.... swimming is a non-impact, high-energy, total body fitness and cardio workout. Have you considered this?

I used to run, all through my twenties, and regularly needed to take a breakf or runner's knee. So, I would switch to swimming 4 or 5 times a week for an hour, swimming a mile, counting laps, striving to beat the men and lap them! So, I set new challenges for myself and managed to keep a sense of satisfaction even though i couldn't go run 8 miles along the towpath in Cambridge, my favourite run......

Swimming can be done at steady state or for interval training, and you can do it wth contact lenses if you wear those, just use goggles, good-fitting ones. All that will suffer is your hair! And they make great anti-chlorine treatments for hair these days too! Plus there's something so very calming from the water, and you'll never hear the telephone ring, so you can completely switch off and plan the rest of your life while you do laps..

Think about it. Wish I could do more.

Have they mentioned a dreaded operation to you? What kind of treatments are available for this condition?

Thinking of you Bobbi,

Clare
 
Hi Bobbi,

I knew you hadn't been around lately and I've been thinking about you as I remembered your birthday was coming up on the 18th (same day as my dad's).

Knowing how much you love your active lifestyle (especially running) I know this must be horrible for you, and since we can't change the fact that impact is out, we might as well concentrate on what activities are "in!"

Since you can bike, this might be something that really catches on with you! I hear mountain biking can be a hoot! Not that I'm saying go out and spend $1000. on a mountain bike, but while you're doing your re-coup thing and biking (stationary), you might find it will make a great crosstraining exercise when you are back up on your feet!
Weights are always something non-impact that you can do. Although you won't be able to jump right in to the cardio/endurance workouts, the pyramid ones should be "grounded" and do-able. And since you're blessed with a dancers body anyway, you might as well keep those long lean muscles long and lean! :)

And I promise to let you live Imax 2 vicariously through me! :)
It won't be pretty, but it should entertain you for a few weeks!
And laughter brings on an endorphin rush just like aerobics! :)

Donna




Fitness~ it's a journey, not a race!
 
Bobbi,
I've struggled with PF for about three years. I've tried sole inserts, icing and stretching and all these things have helped a bit, but the improvement has never been dramatic. About a month ago I discovered something that has helped me tremendously. I don't know whether it will work for you too. The cause of my condition could be completely different from the cause for yours. I'm not a health professional either, so I cannot guarantee that this is what will help you. You might even want to ask your doctor first. Well,here goes.

I've discovered that although I stretch all over and that I'm very flexible, my feet are very stiff and inflexible. The first stretch is to sit on the floor with one leg curled under your body and the other leg (the one you will stretch)with the foot flat on the floor, the knee is bent and pointing upwards. Your hands are at your sides, fingers on the floor to balance you and your torso is as straight as can be. This is a stretch for the achilles tendon. As you become more flexible over time in the achilles tendon area you will be able to press the chest against the bent leg and the more you press forward, the more of a pull you'll feel in your arches. Hold the position for each leg for about a minute. In the beginning I did this stretch up to five times a day.
The second stretch is to sit with both legs curled under your body, knees on the floor. Curl you toes under so that your weight is on the balls of your feet. This stretch was a bit painful for me in the beginning because my big toe joint was very stiff. Hold the position for about a minute. As you become more flexible, sit back more on your feet and let your full body weight press down on your feet to increase the stretch.

Now, like I said. Be very careful when you try out these stretches and if they're too painful then just stop and try them again later when you've healed a bit more. I'm very excited about the results these stretches have had on me. This morning I got out of bed and walked around without any pain at all and that's because I stretched last night before going to bed.

I wish you good luck with this advice and please take care.

MarisaB
 
Hi Bobbi,

I'm sorry to hear about your injury. I know how depressing it can be when you actually want to work out and can't. And I certainly know what you mean about those endorphins. I've taken anti-depressants for many years, but I've been able to cut my dose in half since I started exercising regularly. Have you considered seeing someone about antidepressants--just until you (quite literally) get back on your feet, until you can get those natural antidepressants flowing again? They made a huge difference in the quality of my life (and in the lives of those who love me, as well). And they didn't change my personality, as some people fear. They just allowed me to be the person I always was inside. Maybe they will allow you to be your old self until you get through this trying time and until your injury heals. Just a thought.

Also, many years ago, I had the same injury you had. It got progressively worse and worse until I could hardly walk. It lasted for probably six months, then it began to get better spontaneously. I've heard that the recovery time for this injury can be very, very long, many months, and it was for me, but it did heal eventually, without any treatment at all. Hope you are as fortunate.

Wishing you the best.
 
Hi Bobbi! I know how hard it must be for you. I suffer with PF also, and I love to run! I hardly get to anymore because it just won't go away.

I'm with Clare -- think about swimming! Keep up the stationary bicycling and weight lifting. Maybe also try those elipticals. More than likely, you'll have to keep the impact off for months. I know, that stinks! But, alas, it may be the only option.

I hope you'll get better soon. Try to keep your spirits up. Do something low impact even when you're down, and it may help lift your spirits! :)

Hollie
 
I think I need to apologize but I do so appreciate your positive words. I miss my running but I am healthy and strong and I have alternatives! This too shall pass and if I never run again it, doesn't really matter! There are so many things I CAN do! It's funny (not ha ha funny) how life has a way of putting things into perspective! I posted, then read Sherry's post and thought what an idiot I am! I have a friend in Michigan who has Stage 4 breast cancer and has done really well using alternative therapies since she is reluctant to use mainstream cancer treatments. I hope and pray Sherry will do well and I know what an angel she is! I know her angels are watching over her. My problems seem very inconsequential by comparison. I have dealt with depression, injury, eating disorders and alcohol abuse! This is nothing compared to those. I just have to pull that optimist out of myself and deal with this! It is great to know you are all out there in cyberspace, rooting for me!

Christmas can be so tough! My husband, who is Jewish, and really dislikes the commercialism, lost two of his his best friends to suicide within a year of each other at this time of the year. He's a train wreck, so cranky right now. At first, I was resentful because I am his whipping boy but I realize that I need to be compassionate and to let it be. It'll all be ok. I have a great life! Three kids I adore and a great husband! Good health and a lot of knowledge that will serve me well as I mend. I am used to healing quickly and being able to do ANYTHING but it will come. Thank you so much for the encouragement! I love you guys!

I am just a little scared. I never understood that "take to your bed kind of depression" but I do now! I shake it but it's hard and that is freaky! I know what to do and I am armed and will do what it takes. Life is short, precious. My life is full of blessings and they mean too much for me to let this injury get the best of me! I much prefer to be the encourager and to impart my words of wisdom! I am so excited to be turning forty, at the top of my game, bad foot or no! And I so appreciate your kindness and wisdom. It will sustain me as I deal with this silliness!

http://www.plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif Chick's Rule! B http://www.plaudersmilies.de/natur/petals.gif bbi
 
It sounds like you are feeling a bit better as of your last post--that is good news! This time of year can be really rough, especially if your brain chemistry is out of whack due to something you can't even control. I'm not sure what treatments your doc has prescribed, and I don't mean to doubt his/her expertise, but I thought I'd mention another treatment that one of my friends tried that was successful for her. She is a runner too and developed PF, and the doc gave her this boot-type contraption to wear to bed that keeps your foot at a 90 degree angle to keep the muscles stretched out overnight. That seemed to help her so I thought I'd mention it.

Anyway, hang in there and know that both your injury and the holiday season will be over before you know it! :)

Lauren
 
Thanks, Lauren! You are so right. This is the time of year to count blessings, not wallow in misery! I am at heart an optimistic person and I refuse to let this get me down! These forums are so wonderful for that reason. I tend to keep my dark feelings to myself but here I can let it all go and it helps to "talk" about it! My PF is nothing compared to some of the stuff my family has dealt with. As one of 13 kids we have run the gamut of emotional and physical problems. I will ride the recumbant bike and strength train until my ectomorphic bod looks like Cathe's! I just joined our brnd new Y and it has state of the art exercise equipment! I am feeling more positive and I look forward to licking this! I will ask my doc about the bootlike contraption you mentioned. I ordered a heel pad because he suspects i may be experincing a type of bursitis. I will pursue this until it is healed! Thanks for all the support!
http://www.plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif Chick's Rule! B http://www.plaudersmilies.de/natur/petals.gif bbi
 
Yeeeeah Bobbi! You're the greatest! You will pull through this just fine!! Not sure this will help, but have you considered taking Glucosamine & Chondroitin? It is GREAT for joints, mobility & helps build new cartilage. Just thinking if you can build these areas up, it MIGHT help?? Keep us posted. BTW, you ARE truly blessed if you have a great hubby & 2 kids!!

Your-Friend-In-Fitness, DebbieH http://www.plaudersmilies.de/wavey.gif If You Get The Choice To Sit It Out Or Dance...I Hope You DANCE!!!
 
So wait?....................

Does this mean I don't get to share my Imax 2 experience with you? :) :) :)

Glad you're looking at "greener grass!" Which, coincidently must be difficult there in the desert!? :)

Donna
Fitness~ it's a journey, not a race!
 
Hi Bobbi,
I just know you are going to be all right by reading your posts in the past. You are a very "up" person.
Don't know if this will help or be of any inspiration but I was thinking of two experiences of how two individuals beat the odds.
The first, is a friend of Jane Fonda. I'm reciting this from memory so please excuse me for not remembering the girls' name.
Her story is in Jane's first exercise book. The girl was just outside the workout room when a car ran off the street and hit her. She lost her eye and had a host of other injuries. She was Jane's inspiration because she beat the odds. She adjusted her workouts to the things she Could do. She had someone bring weights into her hospital room, even though the doctors didn't approve. Long story short, even with one eye she is back to teaching aerobics.

The other experience is Gloria Estefon (spelling) While riding in the back of the bus, someone crashed into it. She suffered a broken back and was told she would never walk again. She was determined to beat those odds.

Do you think we beat ourselves up too much? I mean, do you think sometimes we push ourselves so hard....sometimes more than the body is capable of? Well, I know I do at times. As I'm getting older, I find my body doesn't rebound back quite as fast either. My feet and knees scream at me when I do too much high impact. At times I feel like a failure for not being able to do it. My saner moments tell me that a 50 year old doesn't have to do the high jumps. :D :D I had to take off about 10 months one year, due to a surgery. I could only due modified sit ups for several months after that. So I can identify with you in having to sit some exercises out for awhile.

You could think of this as a challenge. Who knows what you may discover in the exercise field that you hadn't even thought of or thought you might like to do. And...you may even discover some things about you....:D In other words, you may even have some neat experiences out of all this crisis.

You have been very kind to me on this board. I just wanted to add my thoughts with the other girls, to let you know I'm rooting for you.
Like Cathe says: "You're gonna make it. You're gonna win."

Hang in there
Wanda
 
Bobbi, you're incredible! Picking yourself up like this, looking at others who are struggling and caring about them, even as you struggle yourself. Wow! I'd say your family is very lucky to have you, as well as vice versa. Glad you're feeling a little better.
 
You guys are so right! And this must be my bodies way to get me to try new things. I know I can enhance my fitness level without the high impact activities. I happen to have a rather low heart rate and that's why I like high impact activity. It's the intensity! I am feeling better. In fact, I am ready to take the bull by the horns and see how well I do with low impact and lots of strength training. I'll be seeing the foot doc as soon as my x-rays are ready and if I treat my foot with respect it will hopefully heal and let me do just a little running! And if I can't, I can't. I will be forty in a few days and it's really exciting to be starting the next chapter in this adventure! You guys keep me grounded, lift my spirits and I do so appreciate all the support and eoncouragement!

http://www.plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif Chick's Rule! B http://www.plaudersmilies.de/natur/petals.gif bbi
 
Bobbi, I know people on the Cathe website often look to other exercise routines as not their style, but as someone who went the same route as you with pf, I did find an exercise routine that worked for me--it's t-tapp. I had the cortisone shots, wear orthotics, stretched my calves and massaged my feet. None solved the problem until I started with the basic t-tapp. If you look at the t-tapp website and do a search for plantar fascitis, or some combo of the name, you will see that a number of people--including me--have been helped by her exercises. Because her exercises are done with the legs bent and under tension, they appear to stretch the muscles which are a large part of the pf problem. It's worth a try, and only would take 15 minutes or so of your time.

Another resource you might want to check out is a book by Bonnie Prudden, who was one of the original gurus of exercise--may hae been during the Kennedy admin. She has a book on exercising for people over 50 (which I know you are not) but I have a memory of a number of exercises that were geared for the feet that might help you. Good luck.

Susan
 
Remember your signature? Chicks rule! Well that means all kinds of chicks - fit chicks, lethargic chicks, injured chicks, worried chicks, etc. You are always such an inspiration to me so I feel honored to be the one offering you advice, but just think of how hard it would be to face your plantar facsiitis without your strength, positive outlook, and nurturing resolve. You have gotten me through many a depressive day Bobbi! Know that we are all cyber-hugging ya right now and you're gonna make it through this. We won't let you give up!!!
 
Hi Bobbi,

I have also missed your posts. Especially as I am a new runner and love all your advice! I know you say that compared to other things your PF is "nothing". But, it is "something" you are dealing with everyday. It still takes a toll emotionally.

It sounds like you are cheering up, but keep coming around here and use us for more cheering when you need it :)

Andrea
 
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