your objective opinions needed - long sorry

J

jgarr44460

Cathlete
I have struggled with posting here as this isn't remotely fitness related but I need objective opinions that friends and co workers cannot give. I will try to be brief but bear with me.
I have worked for 11 yrs for a school district as cook/manager in an elementary school. I can honestly say that I am probably their second best manager in terms of dedication, job productivity etc.
Unfortunatley because of this I was recently told that I would be moving to the high school come Tues. I had a three day warning. I was told it was " for the good of the district" This means going from k-5th grade little darlings to the most unruly kids, the dirtiest kitchen and the most out of control staff. The previous manager was incapable and I get to clean up her mess. They moved HER to an elementary school. Can someone make sense of this for me? That's the thanks I get for doing my job well? My food service director also had told me about a month ago that she needed to make a change up there and to consider it - " change is good". ( BTW - she is new to the district since Sept.this yr.)I told her for so many reasons I was not interested. She told me "I would never force you to go" Well, now she has and I do not feel I can work for someone I feel has betrayed me and lied to me.( She wrote an email of apology after I pointed this out to her) I have also found out that many people in the department knew I was being moved way before I did. I have done nothing but cry for the last three days at home and last night had my second worse migraine ever.
I have applied for a job outside the district - but I am so sad about it. I loved the kids, my hours and obviously my summers off. I can't believe that someone else can decide what they think is best
for me and rock my world. Am I crazy to leave after 11 years? At least I am vested with my retirement.
It doesn't help that this has happened on the anniversary of my mother's suicide either. I don't know why but it makes it worse somehow. Another reason to hate this time of year. I had made a committment to BFL and was doing great with the clean eating and my exercise rotation and now I am eating chocolate and could care less about exercising.
Thanks to anyone who had made it this far and for any thougts you feel like sharing.
 
Gosh, that's awful! Since you are serious about finding another job, perhaps you could inform your current boss of this (in a professional manner of course). Obviously you are an asset to the school and it's in their best interest to keep you. If you inform them that they are about to lose one of their best, perhaps they will reconsider. In the meantime, I would start looking for another job. Who knows, maybe if you end up leaving, your next job will be 100 times better. I hope this works out for you - it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and will end up doing what's best for you. Don't let them push you around!! :)

Carolyn
 
I agree. continue to look outside of the district, but also have a very candid conversation with your boss (not by email) and explain that you feel so strongly that this may force you to leave her employ. In quite a few places where I have worked, the employee got a new job and then gave notice before saying anything. The boss would make an attempt to save her job, but it was too late.

Just remember that she may not react by offering your job back, becuase her hands may be tied in some other way, but that at least you gave her the opportunity to fix the situation.

Dont let this ruin your BFL progress! Use it to drive you forward stronger! Take that anger and use it in your workouts. Then if you still need a bit of chocolate, indulge smartly ;)
 
Wow, my heart just goes out to you. It sounds like you really love those kids and are doing an excellent job in your current position. The way I see it, you have two choices. You can let your boss know how you feel that you are going to seek employment elsewhere, and maybe that will change her mind, or, you can give the new position a try. Maybe think of it as a new challenge, one in which you can shine. Maybe it is not as bad at the high school as it sounds. Maybe you can get in there, clean it up, meet new people and kids ('cause they ARE still kids) and really turn the place around. Change IS very hard, I know, but it could open up new doors. Just my .02. Laura
 
Jen,

I'm so sorry you're being subjected to a non-voluntary transfer from a position in a school you love. I am in my sixth year of contracted teaching, and I have been moved four times, so I completely understand your being devastated by the news. Like you, I felt I was working my butt off and doing a good job, so a forced move felt like a punishment. (Packing up an entire language arts classroom that many times was NOT fun.) Unfortunately, I don't think any position within a district is guaranteed; therefore, you can be re-assigned at any time at the administration's discretion. I'm not sure that it would do any good to contact your union rep, but that might be an option to consider. I would say, though, don't rush to quit just yet. You have a lot of years in already. I know it feels like a slap in the face, but I am a firm believer in trying to see the opportunity side of things that first appear to be setbacks. I had to move again this school year, and although my current classroom is tight on space and not as cush as my last one (among other things, I had no heat - AC only! - for a few months there), I'm making it work. Perhaps you could try working at the HS for a time and keep your feelers out for other positions. If you absolutely hate it, then move on.

BTW, I would make sure the administration and staff gets on board with the enforcement of strict cafeteria rules, so that you are not dealing with pig-sty conditions. You might have a fight on your hands to whip the place into shape, but you sound like just the kind of hard-working, well-organized manager who can get the job done.

(((HUGS))) and good luck!

Oh, and hand over the chocolates. I'll take care of them for you. :p :7

[font face="heather" font color=black size=+2]~Cathy[/font]

http://s228.photobucket.com/albums/ee296/runninteach/exercise/th_skj.gif

http://img17.glitterfy.com/18/glitterfy183635T533D31.gif
 
Jen, I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. I agree completely with Carolyn and Christine. I don't know how school systems work, but don't underestimate your power. I've found generally that people who are good at their jobs have more power than they think. You've done a great job, and everyone likes you. That may give you some major bargaining power. I would speak to anyone who has any say about this and let them know how you feel and that you're looking for another position. (Don't lie: actually look for another position). And let your boss know face to face how betrayed you feel. Don't let her hide behind an email. Take the weekend to deal with your sadness over your mother's death, and on Tuesday, go get 'em!

Please let us know what happens.
 
Hi, Jen. I have to agree with what each woman above has said, especially Nancy...about NOT UNDERESTIMATING YOUR POWER! You probably have a stronger voice and bigger say in what is going to happen than you think.

When you have that meeting to discuss this, share every single thing on your mind. Go write them down right now, so you don't forget, because that tends to happen when the meeting occurs. Be candid. Be confident. Be honest. Include everybody involved in this meeting. Maybe even your school principal, since it's his/her school building. Perhaps HR as well (although I'm not sure how separate the school/HR and the food service are).

Like was also said, USE THIS TO PROPEL YOURSELF FORWARD in your fitness. Take an inventory of YOU and look ahead. YOU WILL MAKE IT THRU THIS.

Finally, I'm offering up prayers on this annivesary of your mom's passing. Please know you're in my thoughts!

Gayle
 
Thank you so much for your responses. I feel better just knowing that I am not crazy that it hurts so much. I have had many verbal conversations with my director in the last three days and have told her that I have already put an application in elsewhere. Her response was "Best Wishes" She also had the nerve to say in writing so to cover herself in case I don't continue to work well. "I am hopeful that the remainder of your stay here you will continue with the same very high quality work that you have always provided the District." I responded that I found it unfortunate that she felt the need to question whether I would continue to work as I always have.
The union is of no use to me because as Cathy says the district by contract can move anybody at anytime. It just hasn't been done before in our department in the entire 11 years I have worked there.
The food service director has already given me her cheerleader pep talk on how I can do this, it's good for me and the district speech more times than I care to hear it. This is really about making her look good in the first year she is here as she needs to pass probation to stay. I am being used plain and simple.This really is just the icing on the cake for me after many other injustices by my building principal for doing my job well. I have no doubt I can do the job - that's not a queston for me - I think I have the right to say no and move on and that's what I intend to do.
Thanks everyone - you have helped me.
 
First off, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. And yes, I'd be upset too if something like this was sprung on me especially when other people knew about it first. However, unfortunately you can't change that.

But, if you do end up taking the move, try to see the bright side. All those little ones that you used to see at the elementary school are the same ones you'll see now so maybe it won't be bad.

Try to take the move as a huge compliment to your abilities. Besides, maybe the reason the other school has out of control staff is because they didn't have the right manager, and Hey, that's you.

Remember, there's a reason for everything. Take care and good luck with your decision.

And lastly, go workout...NOW! You'll only regret neglecting yourself which is probably already beginning to make you feel worse. Nothing seems to lift me up when I'm down more than a Cathe workout. It's the best antidepressant ever!

ETA: I just read your last post and I'm a bit confused(nothing unusual for me) did you quit or did you just tell you're looking for something else? Because her reply sounds as if you've already resigned.

Good luck and take care.
 
Wendy - no I didn't quit. I wouldn't quit without having another job. I told her I had applied for another job and her best wishes were just her way of saying good luck with that. Her point was that it was not going to phase her one way or another. She already told our union rep when other people have said they were going to leave -"Let them". It's her way of letting us know she was going to call our bluff so to speak and we were not going to "threaten" her with leaving. (Her perception of why we would say we were leaving.) She can be cold and all business - peoples feelings do not apply. I actually was letting her know so that she would have time to have an alternate plan for the HS when/if I leave soon but I think that was lost on her.
 
Jen,

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Although it has been stated by other posters that this is how schools work, I still think it is wrong. I'm glad that had your say and decided to move on. Do you really want to work for people that exhibit that behavior and condone it? You are a much stronger person than that. In leaving on your terms you will take with you all your hard work, character and integrity. No one can ever take away the years of service you have given the district. You will always carry that with you. Also, know that everything happens for a reason and you may not know why things happen but ultimately they happen for your highest good and someday you will realize that.

Please continue on your fitness journey. Last year was a rough year for me but I managed to push through and continue working out. It was the only thing that saved me. It made be feel strong and helped to work through all the emotions that were coarsing through me.

{{{Hugs}}} and best of luck to you!!
 
Jen, you've gotten a lot of good advice here. I'd like to suggest, in addition to your having a candid BUT CALM AND OBJECTIVE conversation with your current managers AND looking for a new job, that you consult with a financial planner to make sure you are handling your retirement funds from your current job to your best advantage.

And keep current with your fitness program. The stronger you are physically, the stronger you'll feel emotionally.

Good luck!

A-Jock
 
A-Jock - Thank you for the advice. In the turmoil of my emotions I had not even thought of talking with our financial advisor.

Jane - Thank you also. You nailed my thoughts exactly. I want to leave on my terms and I guess my pride is hurt more than I care to admit. I am also a firm believer in things happening for a reason. That is what is keeping me going.

I appreciate everyones push to not let this keep me from exercising. I guess it's time to leave my pity party and not use it as an excuse. I just came home and found out my 17 yr. got a ticket on his way to work. If he keeps his license it will be a miracle. It's a good thing I am not one to drink!
 
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