won't sleep alone

L

LisaMarie

Cathlete
Since Caden was born, it's been nearly impossible for us to get him to sleep in his crib, despite trying nearly every trick in the book (sleep positioner, breast milk on a shirt, inclined bed, white noise, etc). He will occasionally nap alone on the couch. He hates the swing and isn't a fan of the carseat either. For the sake of my sanity, we've resorted to sleeping with him every night and for most naps. He won't settle for sleeping beside me..he is literally ON me.

It's drivng me crazy having him attached to me all night..can't even get up for the bathroom and my body aches from how I need to sleep. I'm afraid I may now be creating a "monster" that may never sleep alone. Is there anything I can do? Is 6weeks old still too young for me to worry about it? I have Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child, but those methods seem to apply to babies over 4months old. I'd love to read every book out there, but free time is hard to come by with my "high cuddle needs" little guy.

I'm not concerned about him sleeping through the night--I just want to be able to put him in the crib without him crying out as if I've abandoned him.

lisa
 
oh lisa! ive soooo been there. our first was the EXACT same way.
maybe a dumb question, but.... how us he when he's awake? is he content? do you have a wrap/sling that you can carry him in? my midwives talk about babies that won't sleep in theor own that they're not getting held enough, as odd as that seems. HSHHC was our fave book, but i agree that it doesn't offer much for the newborn stage. it did and does give me comfort tho that this too shall pass and there will be restful nights ahead. gotta change a poopy diaper...bbl.......
 
I'm in the same situaton and James just turned 3 months so now I really have to make big changes. He would never sleep in his cradle but we are moving tomorrow and his crib comes Monday and I'm hoping we have better luck with the crib. A friend of mine from Gymboree had the same situation and she said at 4 months her son made the transition to the crib within a week of attempts....so thee s hope for us!!! Just wanted to relate and offer you something optimpistic. good luck!
 
Ferber...

Hi! I feel/felt your pain with my son. Wouldn't sleep, wouldn't sleep alone, wouldn't go to sleep without being rocked, held, etc. Thought I'd lose my mind! He was 2 years old and his sister was on the way before I got this book by Dr. Ferber:

http://www.amazon.com/Solve-Your-Ch...=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1225483821&sr=1-1

It was tough, but we followed the plan and got him sleeping in his own bed before sister arrived (thank goodness!) ... and she was a good sleeper, so that wasn't a problem.

I hope this helps. My son didn't sleep through the night until he was more than a year old. It was so exhausting and frustrating -- thought I'd lose my mind! But he's 10 1/2 now and a very sweet boy. Oh, and he goes to sleep by himself with the sleep routine we established long ago.

Good luck to you! Hope it helps!
 
well I may feel different than some here but I choose to cosleep. At this early age I think it's quite normal for them to be so attached. I slept with the baby to the side of me with my arm around him, right next to me and his head sorta on my shoulder quite a bit near the beginning. It will get easier. A book I recommend is the "no cry sleep solution". http://www.amazon.com/No-Cry-Sleep-Solution-Gentle-Through/dp/0071381392

You just gradually ease them to not needing so much to sleep. maybe another option for you. It was at my library but I bought it. I hear Dr Sears has a book for clingy/fussy babies but I have not read it.
With this baby I'm going to sidecar the crib to have the baby right next to me for the first months. As soon as your little one will fall asleep next to you that could be the next step. http://www.freewebs.com/sidecarcrib/index.htm

I hope he lets you soon so you can get some better sleep. Hang in there.
 
I"m with Jess on co-sleeping......... however...... I also have two weeones (2 & 4 years old) that still make their way to my bed every night. ;)

Good luck!
 
Well my 5 year old sleeps in his big brothers room on the bottom bunk but he does wake from time to time (every few days maybe once) but he doesn't want me he wants DH. lol. DH likes going to snuggle with him at night and doesn't mind it till he nods off again. I'm sure if we wanted to we could say no but we don't mind that. It gives DS comfort and they are SO close now, even though *I* was the co-sleeper when they were babies not DH.
 
I am holding Sara most of the night too. I bf her on a pillow and I can once she's asleep good move the pillow beside me on the couch and she will stay asleep, but I still sleep sitting up sorta and it's hard. The rest of the night after she wakes the first time I am usually holding her. I did this with all of mine and usually by 4-6 weeks I start to put them in the cradle for the first stretch. I recommend swaddling very tightly. That helps them feel secure. Then after the first waking I'd hold them again. Slowly the time till the first waking will space out and for me I try the crib about 3-4 months of age. Thankfully this has worked for my 3 already and it's what I will try for Sara as well. I just def. say swaddle tight. They even make a blanket now that is supposed to not come off.. not sure of the name though. I don't think there is a right or wrong on this one it's just want you are comfy with. Some are okay with co sleeping and some aren't.. it's all okay just find what works for you and your family!..
 
First of all, I think 6 weeks is too young to worry about "spoiling". Your baby is still a newborn and is adjusting to life outside the womb and needs the security of knowing you are there for him. It is tough if you can't sleep with him, though. I was like that with my last child for some reason. She would sleep soundly, but I was so uncomfortable and worried about rolling over on her.

When he's older, I highly recommend the Baby Whisperer's pick-up/put down method. I'm pretty sure there is a Baby Whisperer book and there is a website - babywhisperer.com that addresses sleep issues. It worked beautifully for my youngest and it just seemed like a compassionate way for everyone to get sleep for us.

Good luck! Sleep issues are so frustrating!

Erica
 
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