wine and addiction

L

lwseymour

Cathlete
Okay it's a long story so I will try to be brief. I have MAJOR problems with anxiety. I am on Celexa but it barely helps any. My physician will not give me Xanax or anything similar. In fact I can't find a doctor willing to prescribe a benzodiazepine (sp?).

So, a well-intentioned neighbor a year ago suggested that I try a glass of wine each night to relax. I did. I don't like the taste of any wine. HOWEVER, now I am up to 4 glasses per night. I make special trips to the store (in the morning many hours before drinking) to make sure that I always have enough on hand. Every day I tell myself I have to stop this but every night around 6:00 I go for the first glass. Help, do I have an addiction? Or am I just heading in that direction? I don't even like the taste and I know I'm just self-medicating myself.

I know there are several here probably that managed to give up alcohol. Do you have any suggestions for me on how you stopped? I quit smoking years ago and never went back to it so I know I can be a strong person. But this addiction is SO MUCH more intense.
Thanks anyone for suggestions and I can't believe that I announced this over the internet. It's easier to talk here for me than to personal friends and I couldn't dare talk to family about this.
Lisa
 
I would say you do have an alcohol problem. Get another doctor & talk to him/her about a different type of anti-depressent. Xanax is a tranquilizer, you sound like you need an anti-depressant & a good therapist.

Good luck to you,

Karen
 
You sound like you're well aware of the problem and are looking for others to agree and reassure you of it. Good for you. My only issue is I don't understand why your doctor won't prescribe another medication for you or recommend a good therapist or even work with you a little more. My first advice is to GET A NEW DOCTOR. I have been on Paxil for years and it has worked wonders. I have had nothing but 100% success with it and I can't say enough good things about it. You need to speak with a therapist who can work with you on this and possibly get you going with a proper medication.

My main concern with your wine habit is that you say you don't even like the taste of it. I love, love, love the taste of wine and look forward to my glass or two a night. But I do NOT use it to help me relax or put me to sleep. Call a doctor or therapist TODAY. Don't wait any longer to start feeling better and take control over this. You're already on the right track just by recognizing your problem.

Allison
 
You're also mixing prescription drugs with the wine which is NEVER a good thing. Ditto to what Allison said about calling a doctor or therapist today.
 
Hi Lisa! I agree with above posters that you need to seek help but just wanted to say that I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I'm glad you recognize that you are struggling with this but most of all that you have decided to take some action. Keep us posted! Nice to "see" you here!


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Your-Friend-In-Fitness, DebbieH (AKA "Den Mother Debbie") http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/aktion/action-smiley-066.gif[/img] If You Get The Choice To Sit It Out Or Dance, I Hope You DANCE!
 
Glad to see you're beginning to understand the start of an addiction. The benzodiazapiens have addictive properties also. If you are struggling with anxiety issues, the best thing to do is work with a counselor/therapist on non-pharmaceutical methods to address the anxiety issues. You may need to continue with Rx for awhile if your anxiety is severe, however, by learning some other techniques, you may be able to get rid of the Rx also. You're right, the nightly wine habit needs to stop -- but see a counselor. HTH, Deb
 
Hi Lisa. Is your "physician" a psychiatrist? If not, I think you need to see a psychiatrist immediately and tell him exactly what you told us. I'm no doctor, but from what you've told us, I'm almost sure the doctor will agree that you are self-medicating for a problem that can be better dealt with in other ways. If your current "physician" is a psychiatrist, I would try someone else for sure.
 
I agree that you need to find a new doctor. A psychatrist would be best because they are more familiar with that type of meds. Also, mixing alcohol with meds is not a good idea. I have also read that some antidepressants can cause a craving for alcohol. You really should speak to another doctor. HTH
LD
 
First, either stop taking the meds or stop the alcohol. You can have a seizure if you continue (it happened to my mother a few years ago).

Second, if you see the drinking as a problem, then it is a problem. What's good is that you have recognized it and are willing to speak out about it and fix it. You don't see that very often.

It sounds like this has now become a habit, which, like any other habit, will be hard to break. Before you even have another urge to drink, brainstorm on ways to keep yourself occupied during your normal drinking hours.

Good luck!
 
I forgot to mention this...

You should definitely tell your family about this. Odds are, they probably already know and are just wondering whats going on. I am the daughter of a drinker and she kept it from us for years (we thought she was bipolar, had a chemical imbalance, you name it). I was so pissed when I found out that she could have ended it the whole time. And the constant lying was so unbelievable and unacceptable to me. This has severely damaged the relationship between her and I and completely prevented one from forming between her and my younger brother.

I doubt that your situation is as serious as this, simply because you are trying to fix things. However, a little family support could be just what you need.
 
I started with wine in the evenings to help me relax and get to sleep, 10 years ago!! I eventually got to the stage of severe depression, and the inability to stop drinking. I would promise myself in the morning I would not drink, but that evening there I would sit with my glass of wine, which would usually become a bottle before the night was through. Social situations became difficult because I would have too much to drink and become uncontrollable. My husband worried when I went out with friends and drove alone. I was so humiliated and hopeless. I prayed for God to help me not to drink so much, but never to quit completely. I finally hit my bottom point!! I felt like I was having a complete nervous breakdown, and could not even find any solace or relaxation in alcohol anymore.

I went to AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) about 3 months ago and have not had to drink since then. I read the AA book to see if I was an alcoholic, and what I read was like looking in a mirror. I never lost my job, I ran marathons 2 years in a row, I still had friends, but I could not control my drinking!!

I am on an antidepressant, seeing a counselor, and attending AA regularly. My life is totally different today!! It's hard to even explain. It's not perfect, but I have the tools now to deal with the issues, and not have to use alcohol to relax, numb myself, or to get to sleep. I do drink "Sleepy time" tea in the evenings, and it really helps. I find that my workouts are so much better now, too, without the dehydration and tiredness that comes with drinking so much. I've lost weight without really trying, because alcohol is empty calories you usually tend not to count. Also lowers your inhibitions, so you usually eat things, or more than you normally would.

My heart goes out to you, as I know the feelings you are experiencing. There is hope, and you are so fortunate to discover this now, and not ten years down the road. No one can tell you if you are an alcoholic, or not. Only you can decide that. And you may not be. If you read the AA book, you will discover yes you are, or no you are not. I will be thinking of you and praying for you, also!! Just don't give up! There is help.

Prayers,
Lynn
 
Lisa, as a sober alcoholic whose drink of choice was wine, I can totally relate. I had to hit a pretty hard bottom to quit; no crimes committed by me or against me, no lost job or relationship, no major injury, just . . . no life except alcohol. When I quit, it was on a hot July morning when I woke up, cracked by the ravages of the night before that had been like so many nights before that, and I looked at what my day would be (morning hangover, afternoon withdrawal/craving, nighttime drunk) that had been like so many days before that, and something broke in me and said, "I can't do this today." So . . . I didn't drink that day. The next day I told myself, "I COULDN'T drink yesterday and made it through; today I WON'T drink, and see how it goes."

That was 20 year ago, 07/20/87. One day at a time. With and without AA, but always with the rock-bottom reality that alcohol would always be a dangerous, in fact deadly, substance for me no matter how close or far away I was from my most recent drink.

I agree with the others that you should change doctors, and go to #1 a psychiatrist who has more and better training in pharmaceuticals for mood and behavioral disorders. I also believe you should go to a chemical dependency clinician for a chem dep analysis, because your story sounds achingly familiar to me. Although wine was my drink of choice, I drank plenty of other alcoholic beverages (ranging from scotch to, get this, Listerine mouth wash) where I couldn't stand the taste but needed the effect.

Mixing alcohol with antidepressants is profoundly dangerous. Please get sound medical help for this. You're too precious to become consumed by this, and there is effective help for you out there.

A-Jock
 
Thank you all so much for your heartfelt responses. I won't lie, I still haven't come up with a "date" to stop. I don't want to stop and start, and stop and start. That will upset me and cause me to drink even more. When I quit smoking 12 years ago, I quit cold turkey. I set a date and was successful and never went back. This addiction however, is much worse. I need to educate myself on how to be successful. I need tips to help me succeed. Not sure if they exists however. I imagine that it's going to just take plain hard work.
What is crazy is that I'm still exercising 5 times per week while I am destroying my liver. Completely insane.
Another crazy thing is that this has happened so fast. A few months ago, I just needed help relaxing and a few months later, I am a totally different person. I don't know how this happened. It seemed like it happened overnight. Oh well.
Thanks again for the support. My cathe friends never fail to give me a helping hand and I can't thank you enough.
Lisa
 
Dear Lisa,

I know you have already received some wonderful advice.

I have suffered from an anxiety disorder for my whole life and didn't know what was wrong with me. I used food instead of alcohol to calm down.

AA, ACOA, & Alanon and all the 12 Step programs are wonderful support groups. As they say,"take what you need and leave the rest".

I was on prozac for 18 years and that helped me but the prozac numbed me out. I have been working with a psychiatrist that I trust to help me fine tune my needs for meds. It has been a journey. I have had to try quite a few to find out what I really needed. You may need to be patient before you find what works best for your brain and body. You may not even need meds. Some people can do meditation, exercise and congnitive therapy to manage their anxiety.

So far I have needed some extra brain help. My Cathe workouts and running are a big part of my self care kit.

A wonderful resource for information is Dr. Daniel Amen. He has books about the brain. He covers it all. Addictions, anxiety, depression, AD/HD, etc. I finally discovered that I am AD/HD along with having anxiety. Dr. Amen talks about meds, nutrition, etc.
I believe his web site is www.danielamen.com.

Another "fun" web site is crazyboards. I know the name can be off putting but the folks there have a wicked sense of humor and tons of information from people who have been there.
www.crazyboards.org.

You are on the right track in taking a risk and reaching out for help.

Good Luck,
Colleen
 
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