nancy324
Cathlete
Something about the posts recently got me to thinking today about inspiring, admirable women, and it suddenly dawned on me that my mother is, in her own quiet way, the most amazing woman I know.
My mother celebrated her 70th birthday this month.
She had dropped out of college at the age of 19 to marry my father and start a family. When she was about 36 years old, she saw that many of the people she knew were getting divorced, and she thought it might be a good idea if she got a job so that she could start her own "little bank account". She took a job as a clerk working for the state government processing unemployment claims. She worked her way up the ranks until, by the time she retired, she had been an Appeals Tribunal judge of unemployment cases for many years, writing well-reasoned opinions that were almost always upheld (and occasionally even admired) by the highest courts of the State. My mother's steady salary and excellent benefits allowed my father to take a chance and start his own business, which had always been his dream.
She and my Dad were health advocates, who ate clean and exercised frequently, and enjoyed excellent health. My Dad loved his work, and kept promising that he was going to retire soon so they could start enjoying more leisure time together. My mother was particularly looking forward to having the time to travel for periods of longer than a week or two once my Dad finally gave up his job.
My Dad was still working 4 days a week at the age of 71 and loving it when the diagnosis of cancer of the pancreas came in 2004. My Mom spent six months tending to his every need, and then, in October, he was gone. Suddenly, she was on her own after 49 years of marriage, and she was completely devestated.
My Mom had been part of a book club. A group of about 10 women who were all in their 60s and 70s and who loved literature, and met to discuss books. The group met regularly, but never socialized together. About a year or two before my Dad died, my Mom decided to invite all the women and their husbands over for a New Year's party. Everyone had such a great time together, and the party was such a resounding success, that the couples started to socialize together more and more. When my Dad died, the women from the group, out of concern for my Mom, started planning more events for just the women, without their husbands, so my Mom would feel comfortable. My Mom also joined a support group of women who had recently lost loved ones, where she made several new friends.
It has now been about 15 months since my Dad died, and my Mom is doing fine. It has been difficult, but slowly but surely, she has gone back to most of the things she used to do. She drives to Pennsylvania to visit with her grandkids now, has taken trips to Florida and California to visit family and friends. She has come on family vacations with us. She has gone back to going to the theater, to museums and restaurants and doing all the things she loves to do. She is living again.
And then some. If I want to see my Mom now, I have to make an appointment with her several weeks in advance. Her date book is constantly filled with activities with her friends from the book club and her friends from the support group. I have met most of them, and they are the loveliest people you would ever want to meet.
When my Mom turned 70 this month, she called it her "Polish wedding birthday". The celebrations went on for days. The family took her out on the weekend, and her girlfriends had a party for her during the week. The lunches and gifts still have not stopped. She thought she would be upset on her birthday, but, to her surprise, she was fine.
To me, she is absolutely amazing.
Who is the most amazing woman in your life?
-Nancy
My mother celebrated her 70th birthday this month.
She had dropped out of college at the age of 19 to marry my father and start a family. When she was about 36 years old, she saw that many of the people she knew were getting divorced, and she thought it might be a good idea if she got a job so that she could start her own "little bank account". She took a job as a clerk working for the state government processing unemployment claims. She worked her way up the ranks until, by the time she retired, she had been an Appeals Tribunal judge of unemployment cases for many years, writing well-reasoned opinions that were almost always upheld (and occasionally even admired) by the highest courts of the State. My mother's steady salary and excellent benefits allowed my father to take a chance and start his own business, which had always been his dream.
She and my Dad were health advocates, who ate clean and exercised frequently, and enjoyed excellent health. My Dad loved his work, and kept promising that he was going to retire soon so they could start enjoying more leisure time together. My mother was particularly looking forward to having the time to travel for periods of longer than a week or two once my Dad finally gave up his job.
My Dad was still working 4 days a week at the age of 71 and loving it when the diagnosis of cancer of the pancreas came in 2004. My Mom spent six months tending to his every need, and then, in October, he was gone. Suddenly, she was on her own after 49 years of marriage, and she was completely devestated.
My Mom had been part of a book club. A group of about 10 women who were all in their 60s and 70s and who loved literature, and met to discuss books. The group met regularly, but never socialized together. About a year or two before my Dad died, my Mom decided to invite all the women and their husbands over for a New Year's party. Everyone had such a great time together, and the party was such a resounding success, that the couples started to socialize together more and more. When my Dad died, the women from the group, out of concern for my Mom, started planning more events for just the women, without their husbands, so my Mom would feel comfortable. My Mom also joined a support group of women who had recently lost loved ones, where she made several new friends.
It has now been about 15 months since my Dad died, and my Mom is doing fine. It has been difficult, but slowly but surely, she has gone back to most of the things she used to do. She drives to Pennsylvania to visit with her grandkids now, has taken trips to Florida and California to visit family and friends. She has come on family vacations with us. She has gone back to going to the theater, to museums and restaurants and doing all the things she loves to do. She is living again.
And then some. If I want to see my Mom now, I have to make an appointment with her several weeks in advance. Her date book is constantly filled with activities with her friends from the book club and her friends from the support group. I have met most of them, and they are the loveliest people you would ever want to meet.
When my Mom turned 70 this month, she called it her "Polish wedding birthday". The celebrations went on for days. The family took her out on the weekend, and her girlfriends had a party for her during the week. The lunches and gifts still have not stopped. She thought she would be upset on her birthday, but, to her surprise, she was fine.
To me, she is absolutely amazing.
Who is the most amazing woman in your life?
-Nancy
