The frustration of being overweight and unfit

[gonnabthin06]

This past year (this will account for the discrepancy in my user name) I lost about 35lbs. Still, I am FAR from where I want to be, but of course I feel better. The reason I have come here is because I feel the need to re-evaluate my course of action and my goals. I run into a problem here because the people who surround me everyday seem to carry the same opinion: because I've been overweight since childhood and have still never gotten to my "goal" weight, I'd better settle for just being overweight--in that overweight is better than obese. I remember my discussion with a family member saying how I couldn't wait for the day when I would buy a size 6 like my sister, and this family member replied "oh honey, size 12 would be good for you." Not that I think that a size 12 is bad (just a bit more work!), but I begin to wonder if "they" are right. I am only 20 and yet my legs are jello-like, my arms are less-than toned, my stomach is mushy and protrudes: is there no hope for me? I haven't thought so, and that is why you find me posting to the very smart and fit people on Cathe's board. I don't want my body to be doomed so young. Granted, there are some things that I cannot change, but I think most things can be helped.

As soon as I begin to have hope again, I want to go out and climb Everest and then I realize that I am lacking a plan. So, come Christmas I would like to have at least some proof that "they" are wrong. Surely something can be accomplished in 6 months. I have kept up with the Cathe videos pretty well (maybe that's a testament to my age..surely not my health), but my muscle tone is lacking. Losing weight is definitely still a top goal of mine. Can anyone please help me with an exercise routine or direction to a rotation? I have found the beginner to be a bit dull, so where shall I go from there? I have the stability and medicine balls, the cable-things, a step, free weights, a home treadmill, a home gym (Weider), and a University gym facility all at my disposal. I know, there are NO excuses. I just want to use everything in the best combination.

I am sure I'm not the first, and unfortunately not the last, to have received "Debbie Downer" comments from her family.

 

[GreenEyedLefty]

My gosh. You are so young, of COURSE there's hope! Well, there's hope at any age, but at 20 the world is your oyster.

I went to a really interesting seminar last night and one of the things I learned is to visualize myself in 20 years, if I keep going on the same path. What will I look like, where will I live, what will I do, etc. The point of the exercise is to realize that we truly are the masters of our destiny. Not our friends, not our family members, but ourselves alone.

To answer your questions about rotation - I did Cathe's beginner rotation, then moved right into Power Hour and Cathe's other weight training videos. If you stick to lifting with less cardio, you will notice a big difference in your physique.

But for me, the X factor for weight loss is always diet. Clean eating along with your exercise plan will transform you.

Ultimately, though, do this for YOU. Don't make a big point of sending people messages - your results alone will speak volumes.

 

[janiejoey]

gonnabthin06,

You need to be a little easier on yourself. Congratulations for losing 35 pounds! That is a huge accomplishment! You have been overweight all your life, and it will take some time to get to your goals. Make goals along the way and enjoy the process with little strides as you conquer your goals during that time. It's fun to see how you grow fitter and healthier as the days, weeks, and months go by. Of course the first step is to live a completely different way than you are use to and the people that surround you.

You need someone that can support you in times when it is difficult and after you reached your little goals to share it with, or even when you didn't reach a goal (it happens sometimes). But don't be afraid of difficulty. It's hard work as you already know. Also, you already have support here on this forum.

Eat clean, meaning when you do eat, eat as fresh as you possibly can. If you have a choice of an orange or orange juice, pick the orange. If you have a choice of an apple or apple juice, pick an apple. For each meal try to eat fruit, vegie and some kind of protein, (like beans and rice, or broil or boiled or microwave lean meat) and when using fats, eat either a few nuts or 1/8 avocado's one or the other instead of oils in all of your meals. Check out "Burn the Fat Feed the Muscle" on the internet. To me it is a valuable way of learning about nutrition, exercising, gaining muscle and losing weight. All in one package.

If you decide to do both, Cathe and other exercises, then you check out Cathe's rotation forum. There are so many rotations out there, that I'm sure you'll find a gang of them that will fit your level.

Welcome to Cathe's place. You'll meet a lot of terrific and knowledgeable people here.

See you sometime at the top of Mount Everest,

Janie

The idea is to die young as late as possible

www.picturetrail.com/janiejoey

 

[ldy_solana]

>This past year (this will account for the discrepancy in my
>user name) I lost about 35lbs. Still, I am FAR from where I
>want to be, but of course I feel better. The reason I have
>come here is because I feel the need to re-evaluate my course
>of action and my goals. I run into a problem here because the
>people who surround me everyday seem to carry the same
>opinion: because I've been overweight since childhood and
>have still never gotten to my "goal" weight, I'd better settle
>for just being overweight--in that overweight is better than
>obese. I remember my discussion with a family member saying
>how I couldn't wait for the day when I would buy a size 6 like
>my sister, and this family member replied "oh honey, size 12
>would be good for you." Not that I think that a size 12 is
>bad (just a bit more work!), but I begin to wonder if "they"
>are right. I am only 20 and yet my legs are jello-like, my
>arms are less-than toned, my stomach is mushy and protrudes:
>is there no hope for me? I haven't thought so, and that is
>why you find me posting to the very smart and fit people on
>Cathe's board. I don't want my body to be doomed so young.
>Granted, there are some things that I cannot change, but I
>think most things can be helped.
>
first of all any who tries to tell you to "just settle" must have some issues have their own. yeah i sound like a witch on this i know. you have to settle for what makes you happy. a size 6 or size 12 is jsut a number and might not make you happy.fit,strong,and healthy probably will. try not to let them bring you down, whether they mean it or not. as somebody said YOU need somebody that supports you in every positive step no matter how small.

next to your rotation and exercise question. i am no good at writing up rotations but all i can suggest is a balance of resistance training,cardio, and stretch on top of plenty of rest for the body to recover from vigorous exercise. next,as many ppl have said here over and over, HEALTHLY lifestyle changes in your eating are 85% if not more in your overall fitness program.

i believe charlotte has the sig that says" you can exercise until the cows come home, but without clean eating you are just a cow coming home". its a bit harsh for some but i refer back to this when i fall off my wagon(like now). i have to remember for results is to eat well. lots of fresh veggies,fiborous foods, and lean cuts of protien and i have been eating more fish for protien as of late. try to avoid processed junk from a box,sugar and empty calories and carb foods. i still treat myself but i have to write down everything to see where i am falling weak and try to correct that. somebody recommended http://sparkpeople.com which i am thinking of signing up for so i can easier keep track of my food intake and calorie and fat count so i can lean out some more. i am obviously strong and healthy but my body fat is on the rise. for me its not about the number on the scale its about my body fat(which i have to get measured at some point),b/c that to me determines exactly how healthy range i am in.

HTH
kassia

http://www.picturetrail.com/ldy_solana

"And do what thee wilt as long as ye harm none"

http://images.meez.com/user03/06/01/04/060104_10010099873.gif

 

[lkl]

My brother was overweight his entire childhood, so I really feel for you. He was able to lose weight and get in great shape, so don't let anyone discourage you. He followed WW, which I find good because they do not forbid any foods. My advice is to throw away the scale if you have one. For years, I was obsessed with what I weighed and it only made me more miserable if I didn't lose alot every week. Additionally, sometimes your body body will be building muscle and it won't show up on the scale. This can be very discouraging and can hurt your motivation. If you are able to do one of Cathe's weight training DVDs 3X wk and get 3X wk. of cardio, you will lose inches and go down in clothes size. This will be your best indicator.

 

[LadyUnix]

hello gonnabethin06,

already you've read some good advice and perceptive comments, and others will post more. I'll just add that, 1) as far as rotations go...I'm sure someone who as the link will post it soon. and 2)it's not true that you are doomed to alwa being overweight. Since hs, I fought the odd 10-20 lbs, and then ballooned up to over 213 at 5'4". I lost 90 lbs and have kept it off for four years.

Go have a look in the Success Stories Forum, and be inspired by them. Go look around more on the net and be inspired. You CAN change the weight, with hard work and proper motivation, and good on you for realizing from the beginning what is the correct way to do it. And, think how wonderful it will be....your entire life ahead of you as a healthy and fit woman!

You're off to a great start, keep it up and don't forget to have lots of fun while you're at it!

 

[kariev]

hey there! don't be so hard on yourself. you can do anything you put your mind to and cathe will definately help you get there. i was chunky my whole childhood. then in 10th grade i got fed up with feeling ashamed of my body and being tired all the time and i decided to change things. I have since kept off those pesky 35lbs i lost almost 8 yrs ago. for me i focused on health and not the scale. i worked out 6 days a week alternating cardio with weight training days and at first i wasn't that strict with diet. you know what is bad for you (fast food, deserts, mayo, fried foods, etc.) that is what i cut out. over the years i have perfected my diet and workout and i'm always increasing my health knowledge. you have to do a little at a time and try and stay positive. its also not about anyone else but you. do it b/c you want to. on these message boards we believe in being strong and healthy. not skinny and sickly. you can do it!!!

 

[MSJ]

35 lbs is fantastic--way to go! You must be doing something right. Hang in there. I think the other ladies gave you lots of good suggestions, so I won't repeat stuff, except that maybe your body has adjusted to your new better fitness level and you need to challenge yourself more physically--with both weights and cardio--just do it gradually, so that you don't injure yourself.

You are so young that I wouldn't worry about a rigid goal like being a size 6 in six months. Think of this as a life long project of health and fitness.

Throw away the scale and don't compare yourself to other people.

Check out the rotations forum and see what you can find.

You are doing great--keep it up.

Maggie

 

[mrsmel]

I just want to add my congratulations on your 35# weight loss! That is fantastic! And, have you seen Cathe's intermediate rotation? That might be the next logical step for you. It's here:

http://69.0.137.118/dc/dcboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=7&topic_id=6852&mesg_id=6852&page=2

As hard as it is, try to stay positive and remember all you've accomplished already. It's so easy to focus on the negative, but if you can try to match every negative thought with a positive one, it changes your mindset. That can do a world of good. One of the things I'm working on is not saying anything to myself that I wouldn't say to another person. I try very hard not to hurt other people's feelings, so why should I hurt my own? It's an ongoing struggle, but it's helping me be kinder to myself.

Just some thoughts. Good luck on your journey, you're doing great!

anne

 

[lioness]

Congratulations on your weight loss!! I have nothing to add really as you have received some great advice. Just know that weight loss is a journey and it takes time to change your lifestyle. It can be done as I and many others can attest to. I started my journey 8 years ago and it has led me to many incredible insights and joys. It truly has been a remarkable ride. Focus on you and only you. Do not listen to others that tell you that it can't be done or settle for less than what you strive for. Standing strong and being true to yourself is the greatest gift that you can give yourself. Surround yourself with people that care about YOU and support YOU. Be gentle with yourself for there will be days that you will struggle but in those times think of all that you have already accomplished. At the end, it will be the times of struggle that will give you your greatest joys and satisfaction.

Please come back here often for support. Best of luck to you and stay strong!! You are doing a fantastic job!!

 

[fit@home1]

Congrats on your weight loss thus far!!! What a wonderful accomplishment.

I was wondering about weight lifting. Do you lift really heavy a couple of times a week? That might be the real key to tightening up your body.

 

[Jess_jugs]

I can just *hear* the frustration in your post. Believe me, I've been there, done that. I was *always* the chubby one in my family. My Dad flat out told me (when I was around 12, I think?) that I was going to be big like his sisters. Great, thanks. I guess people just expected that I was going to be heavy. I was about 185 lbs in high school & when I got married. Then when I got pg w/ my 1st dd I got up to my highest weight of 225 lbs!! I could hear the comments from family about how I'd never lose the weight, etc. All it did was make me even more determined to lose weight. I managed to lose the baby weight plus some, then got pg w/ my 2nd, again gained too much weight, and then after my 3rd child was about 8 mos old I decided enough was enough. I was going to be the fittest I could be. I have lost about 75 lbs since she was born (4 yrs ago!), but the best part is that I have KEPT IT OFF!!! It takes everything though- cardio, weights, and eating CLEAN! I gave up white flours & sugars and started w/ the South Beach Diet.

Anyway, don't let ANYONE tell you that you are doomed to be fat or that you can't lose weight. You CAN do it. There are some awesome ladies here that will give you some great advice.

Oh yeah, and my Dad, the one that told me I was doomed to be fat? Well, he's the one bragging about how thin I am now and coming to ME for advice. Now I'm the *health nut* in my family.

Take care.