Talking to a friend

[Timber99]

How do you tell a friend that they are holding on *way* too tight to their man? My friend has a wonderful man in her life but she is very controlling and doesn't agree with him doing almost anything without her. If they are both home, they are together. She won't leave if he is there with friends or family. She won't let him leave either. It isn't a demand but she makes it very difficult if he wants to go and do something without her. He isn't going to bars or doing anything wrong either. It probably isn't worth it for him to deal with the grief. She's a dear friend but I worry that some day she may drive him away.

 

[candi]

It would probably be best to let things play out. Your friend obviously has abandonment issues which are usually very, very deep rooted. Giving your opinion probably won't change how she treats her BF but suffering the consequences of her behavior may.

 

[Carol_is_fit]

I agree. It might be best to lay low. Be there for your friend and support her, but she may not see this issue in the same way you do. Hopefully they will work this out on their own. If he feels the way you believe he does, it's his place to talk to her and tell her that. Sounds like she's afraid of something, and you might try to approach it that way if you're determined to talk to her about it, but I would tread carefully. Most people find it painful and insulting to have what others perceive as their "faults" pointed out to them, and their first reaction is defensiveness. Sending good thoughts your way that it works out for your friend.

Carol

 

[clareMc]

It's a conversation for her man to have with her. If he loves her, they'll work something out.

Clare

 

[lorihart]

Yeah, you may just want to let things ride.She make take offense to this and feel as if is none of your business, even though you have her best interest at heart.Im suse he sees if and if he doesn't enjoy it, he will talk to her about it. This is one thing that a man doesn't like and he will probably start pulling away from her is she doesn't back off. Everyone needs their space.
I have a friend whose boyfriend is like that and I think she is getting sick of him. They have probably been dating for 2 yrs and he is very clingy.I don't think he is overly jealous but if she says that she is going to go for a walk with a friend, he whines and does the "what am I gonna do while you are out for a walk". She is very independent and I really think this is getting to her. She called the other day and talked to me about it.She said that they were going to a movie that night and then he said "well, what are we going to do tomorrow night?" I often wonder what will happen to them.
Lori

 

[Timber99]

Thanks guys...I will step back & not say a word about this, given your opinions! Time and again, I get pulled into it (b/c she is complaining or whatever) so I will have to politely say that it is not my BEESWAX!