Hello everyone! I'm just having these guilty feelings of having the need to have my two children(2 and 4 years) stay in school for an extra two hours two days a week so that I can get stuff done. The stuff to which I refer is laundry, mopping, dishes, cleaning bathrooms, etc. I also have a big medical board exam to take at the end of May. It's only for my NCLE, which is an exam for opticians and it's said to be very hard. I am also working 32 hours plus each week. Is it bad to also want one hour each day to do something I like for myself? My marriage is definitely suffering because I am so stressed out when I do see my husband(which isn't very often as he works 50 some hours each week). Do you think I made a wise decision? I just feel as though if I feel less stressed, the kids will feel happier. Also my marriage will be better. Thanks for listening, I mean reading. Alicia
stressed and feeling guilty
- Thread starter tinytaebo
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ldy_solana
Cathlete
alicia,
as dr.phil would say "how's your way working for you". if you are overworked and stressed then NO its not a problem to take time for yourself. i wish i could keep viola in school for an extra two hours a day not only to get things done, but to also interact. that is something alot of kids have forgotten how to do without cell phones and emails these days. to interact face to face with other kids for more then an hour a day.
also, i understand hubby works alot so does mine, but they have to help too. you have young kids and its too much for one person to handle alone and even harder with all that you have on your plate.
you are right if you are less stressed,everybody will be happier.
kassia
When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be
disappointed to discover they are not it -- Bernard Bailey
as dr.phil would say "how's your way working for you". if you are overworked and stressed then NO its not a problem to take time for yourself. i wish i could keep viola in school for an extra two hours a day not only to get things done, but to also interact. that is something alot of kids have forgotten how to do without cell phones and emails these days. to interact face to face with other kids for more then an hour a day.
also, i understand hubby works alot so does mine, but they have to help too. you have young kids and its too much for one person to handle alone and even harder with all that you have on your plate.
you are right if you are less stressed,everybody will be happier.
kassia
When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be
disappointed to discover they are not it -- Bernard Bailey
buffettgirl
Cathlete
I doubt your kids will even notice the extra hour or two. If it makes you a better mom, it's a good thing. Good luck with your exam. Is your job related to the exam? Would they be willing to give you some time at work to study?
SRP
Cathlete
Any kind of medical school is TOUGH and incredibly demanding. You're working nearly full time, raising two kids and maintaining a household. If this helps you to be more efficient... and most likely will help you have a little more family time... then DO IT. Everyone needs a time to relax. I'm glad you have a way to do it.
Robin- My exam is related to my job, so I am sure if it were possible, they would be able to give me time to study. However, we're incredibly understaffed at work, so I would feel bad asking for time off to study. My department at work is in such disarray when I come in that it seems as though everything would fall apart if I weren't there. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to my woes. You made me feel much more validated in my decision. Alicia
Does your husband feel guilty working 50 hours + a week? Hmmm.... think about that. I find it is a woman thing.
Alicia I am right there with you/ F/T work, two kids, too much to do. Take the extra time. If you spend it with your kids it will not be quality time anyway if you are stressed and preoccupied right? First Mommy has to be happy then thr family will follow. It works for me and I feel somewhat less guilty. I will also admit I have a very involved, hands on husband. He works like crazy but does find time for himself. We are just getting abck to "us" now that the baby years and no money/major hustle years are past.
Let me also advise til May: paper plates, dirty house, spring for a cleaning service at least once per month if you can - or even cheaper but just as valuable send your laundry out to be done every so often. And when that tub is clean, take a nice long soak.
Julie
Alicia I am right there with you/ F/T work, two kids, too much to do. Take the extra time. If you spend it with your kids it will not be quality time anyway if you are stressed and preoccupied right? First Mommy has to be happy then thr family will follow. It works for me and I feel somewhat less guilty. I will also admit I have a very involved, hands on husband. He works like crazy but does find time for himself. We are just getting abck to "us" now that the baby years and no money/major hustle years are past.
Let me also advise til May: paper plates, dirty house, spring for a cleaning service at least once per month if you can - or even cheaper but just as valuable send your laundry out to be done every so often. And when that tub is clean, take a nice long soak.
Julie