overweight question
- Thread starter jdoll
- Start date
FiddleFit
Cathlete
I believe the argument is that the additional weight from surplus body fat acts on your body the same way strapping an xx pound sack of flour around your middle would. Your muscles have to work harder to move the body, and this makes your heart pump harder, too. And if your fitness level is low, your muscles will not be very efficient at their job, and the whole movement will just feel harder to you, than to someone thinner and conditioned.
The good news is that this means you don't have to do advanced cardio moves or lift really heavy weights in order to gain fitness benefits for your body and to burn a large amount of calories! When I began working out with Cathe two years ago, in an effort to lose 72 extra pounds, I started on the 4" step, and did ZERO impact. If she hopped even a little, I kept my foot on the floor. If she ran on the step to "keep the heart rate up", I informed her that my heart rate was up as high as it needed to be, without all that running. I told her (and yes, I speak to her when I exercise!) that she was not doing the workout with a 72 pound coat on, so she could jump all over the place if she cared to. I was sticking with the lo-impact version! I always ended the workouts just as sweaty as she did. I also found that every time I lost 20 pounds, I felt ready to add another riser under the step. It had become that much easier to throw my own body weight around.
Reaching my goal weight was a mixed blessing because I now have to do all the really advanced moves just to maintain my fitness level, and to burn enough calories to prevent weight gain. Some days it's hard to face airborn jacks and tuck jumps at 5:30am. But I'm looking cut these days!! Love it! I've never looked so conditioned in my life. And I love being able to do cartwheels.
Short answer: work only as hard as you need to, to work up a good sweat and get your heart rate in an aerobic zone. THAT is the appropriate level for you, and it is the indication that you are burning plenty of calories. Do not do an advanced move just because Cathe does it; don't risk an injury.
Have fun!
Sandra
The good news is that this means you don't have to do advanced cardio moves or lift really heavy weights in order to gain fitness benefits for your body and to burn a large amount of calories! When I began working out with Cathe two years ago, in an effort to lose 72 extra pounds, I started on the 4" step, and did ZERO impact. If she hopped even a little, I kept my foot on the floor. If she ran on the step to "keep the heart rate up", I informed her that my heart rate was up as high as it needed to be, without all that running. I told her (and yes, I speak to her when I exercise!) that she was not doing the workout with a 72 pound coat on, so she could jump all over the place if she cared to. I was sticking with the lo-impact version! I always ended the workouts just as sweaty as she did. I also found that every time I lost 20 pounds, I felt ready to add another riser under the step. It had become that much easier to throw my own body weight around.
Reaching my goal weight was a mixed blessing because I now have to do all the really advanced moves just to maintain my fitness level, and to burn enough calories to prevent weight gain. Some days it's hard to face airborn jacks and tuck jumps at 5:30am. But I'm looking cut these days!! Love it! I've never looked so conditioned in my life. And I love being able to do cartwheels.
Short answer: work only as hard as you need to, to work up a good sweat and get your heart rate in an aerobic zone. THAT is the appropriate level for you, and it is the indication that you are burning plenty of calories. Do not do an advanced move just because Cathe does it; don't risk an injury.
Have fun!
Sandra
mogambo
Cathlete
What a perfect answer, Sandra. Yes, that is all very true. My overweight friend Brenda doesn't have to jump high or strap on any ankle weights. Her own leg is pretty darn heavy.
I've noticed that even 5 lbs of blubber lost on my body makes a difference to my knees on a 5 mile run, the effort required. And with ten pounds it is all very obvious.
I've noticed that even 5 lbs of blubber lost on my body makes a difference to my knees on a 5 mile run, the effort required. And with ten pounds it is all very obvious.
Sandra,
I bet you get asked this question a million times but what was your plan to lose 72 lbs.? That is quite an accomplishment. If I remember correctly weren't you on WW? If you were on WW are you a lifetime member?
I remember you answered a question of mine on emotional eating. I have a problem with binge eating and am thinking about getting a book on the subject. I have about 20 lbs. to lose to be at a healthy BMI. I would ideally like to lose 35.
Any helpful things that you learned along the way would be greatly appreciated. I will go back and re-read your response to the emotional eating thread that I created.
What do you think caused you to be 70 lbs. overweight? Were you always heavy? Did you have any compulsive eating issues? I am sorry I am drilling you like this but I rarely get to hear how people deal with changing their behavior to keep weight off for the long term. It is a constant battle for me and sometimes I think I am going crazy.
Jdoll-thank you for letting me post this on your thread. I hope you don't mind.
Lori
I bet you get asked this question a million times but what was your plan to lose 72 lbs.? That is quite an accomplishment. If I remember correctly weren't you on WW? If you were on WW are you a lifetime member?
I remember you answered a question of mine on emotional eating. I have a problem with binge eating and am thinking about getting a book on the subject. I have about 20 lbs. to lose to be at a healthy BMI. I would ideally like to lose 35.
Any helpful things that you learned along the way would be greatly appreciated. I will go back and re-read your response to the emotional eating thread that I created.
What do you think caused you to be 70 lbs. overweight? Were you always heavy? Did you have any compulsive eating issues? I am sorry I am drilling you like this but I rarely get to hear how people deal with changing their behavior to keep weight off for the long term. It is a constant battle for me and sometimes I think I am going crazy.
Jdoll-thank you for letting me post this on your thread. I hope you don't mind.
Lori
I found the post, thank you Sandra. Below is her reply to emotional eating. I hope you don't mind that I posted this Jdoll. I will stop changing the subject of your thread.
>>>>>Yes, I've had problems in the past with eating for reasons other than hunger, and for not being able to have "just a little". A few years ago I finally realized that eating in response to anything but hunger not only left the original problem unsolved, but also gave me a new problem: guilt and extra weight. Since then I have worked to address my problems head on, and actually let myself feel the emotions I was trying to avoid. Sad about something? Then feel sad. Angry? Then feel angry. Stressed out about something? Make a realistic plan of action to resolve the situation causing the stress. Feeling tired? Go to sleep. The gist of it is: eating for any reason other than hunger will not change the situation, except to make you feel even worse.
To help out while you learn how to do this, it is a very good idea to have all the junk food out of the house, and lots of healthy food within it. I keep a bowl of chopped fresh pineapple or cantaloupe in my fridge at all times, as well as baby carrots and chopped celery. If I'm feeling the need to *really* eat, I am permitted to "pig out" on all the fruit and vegetables I want. I figure an entire pineapple probably doesn't add up as much as an entire brick of ice cream.
It takes time to unlearn patterns of behaviour. You need to be really tuned in to yourself; there is lots of trial and error, but you need to keep searching. And look at every setback as an opportunity to learn more about yourself, not as "failure". Also, it might help you to remember that the only person who should decide what and how much you eat is YOU, because ONLY YOU have to live with the consequences of that decision. Don't eat crap because some greedy corporation splashes a fancy ad across your television, telling you to - unless they're willing to pay your medical bills and for the extra seat you will eventually need on the airplane.
Be kind to yourself; treat yourself the same way you treat your best friend. When in doubt about something, ask yourself what you would say to your best friend, if s/he were in the same situation.
Good luck!
Sandra<<<<<
>>>>>Yes, I've had problems in the past with eating for reasons other than hunger, and for not being able to have "just a little". A few years ago I finally realized that eating in response to anything but hunger not only left the original problem unsolved, but also gave me a new problem: guilt and extra weight. Since then I have worked to address my problems head on, and actually let myself feel the emotions I was trying to avoid. Sad about something? Then feel sad. Angry? Then feel angry. Stressed out about something? Make a realistic plan of action to resolve the situation causing the stress. Feeling tired? Go to sleep. The gist of it is: eating for any reason other than hunger will not change the situation, except to make you feel even worse.
To help out while you learn how to do this, it is a very good idea to have all the junk food out of the house, and lots of healthy food within it. I keep a bowl of chopped fresh pineapple or cantaloupe in my fridge at all times, as well as baby carrots and chopped celery. If I'm feeling the need to *really* eat, I am permitted to "pig out" on all the fruit and vegetables I want. I figure an entire pineapple probably doesn't add up as much as an entire brick of ice cream.
It takes time to unlearn patterns of behaviour. You need to be really tuned in to yourself; there is lots of trial and error, but you need to keep searching. And look at every setback as an opportunity to learn more about yourself, not as "failure". Also, it might help you to remember that the only person who should decide what and how much you eat is YOU, because ONLY YOU have to live with the consequences of that decision. Don't eat crap because some greedy corporation splashes a fancy ad across your television, telling you to - unless they're willing to pay your medical bills and for the extra seat you will eventually need on the airplane.
Be kind to yourself; treat yourself the same way you treat your best friend. When in doubt about something, ask yourself what you would say to your best friend, if s/he were in the same situation.
Good luck!
Sandra<<<<<
sandra...great answer. thanks for taking the time to type all that! your experience is inspiring for me, and i need all the inspiration i can get right now. Maybe that's why i am always on this forum!!! i have done SEVERAL posts now and you have given splendid answers to alot of them. thank you for your attentiveness! i really appreciate it.
i am definately sweating with cathe's dvds and my heart rate is up there, so i must be burning some calories. haven't lost any weight yet and it has been 4 weeks. but i have read all these posts here and done some research and have a feeling i have cut too many calories (1200-1300/day)and my body is holding all it can get. i will have to experiment with that....who knows. i am trying to just be patient and let it all happen in good time. i have gotten some good rotation ideas from several members here and i will try them all.
jes
i am definately sweating with cathe's dvds and my heart rate is up there, so i must be burning some calories. haven't lost any weight yet and it has been 4 weeks. but i have read all these posts here and done some research and have a feeling i have cut too many calories (1200-1300/day)and my body is holding all it can get. i will have to experiment with that....who knows. i am trying to just be patient and let it all happen in good time. i have gotten some good rotation ideas from several members here and i will try them all.
jes
FiddleFit
Cathlete
Jes and Lori, thank you so much for the inspiring compliments! It is really gratifying to know that my own experience can provide motivation for others. And thanks for pasting my 'emotional eating' comments here, Lori. It's very relevant.
And Mogambo, thanks for the "perfect answer" remark! I feel like I just aced a test LOL!!
Gosh, I have so much to say about the subject of weight loss, I'm not sure where to start, nor when to stop! I'll try to be succinct.
Yes, I joined WW on July 3, 2002, the day after returning from a 4 day conference where I had the most miserable time of my life, because I was so embarrassed by how much weight I'd gained since the last time I saw all those people (my professional peers!). And yes, I am now a lifetime member, but I stopped attending meetings. I am grateful to WW for being one of the few organizations that endorse and actively support a common-sensical and healthy way to lose weight.
I've been at least slightly overweight ever since puberty. In this regard, I take after my father's family. Ergo, I'm not, nor have ever been, the kind of person who can eat as much as she wants, and doesn't gain a pound. It has taken me 22 years to figure that out, and to fully accept it. Ever since I was 14 I've gained, lost, gained, lost....rinse and repeat.....That largest weight gain came *after* I had my daughter, 4 years ago.
I got pregnant immediately in the fall of 1999, followed immediately be feeling so sick and tired that I stopped exercising, and any pretense of eating healthy went out the window. I ate only what I could choke down, and stopped all my fitness. I slept (it seemed) from Dec 1 to Jan 31. My lovely daughter was born in July, 2000, and I had a bit of baby weight to lose, but not a whole lot. But I was just very, very tired from being a new mom, and recovering from a very difficult birth. At one point I just accepted that I would be large for the rest of my life, and donated away 3 garbage bags full of clothes. So, that brings me back to the conference in June, 2002. I was 70 pounds overweight, and instead of proudly talking to people about my research, and about the book I'd co-authored, I just wanted to hide in my hotel room. The last time they'd all seen me was when I was 8 months pregnant; some people didn't even recognize me.
I began WW, and gradually started back into exercise. You've already read the rest of that story. It took me about 10 months to lose the weight. Along the way, I discovered a lot of things about myself that surprised me. For starters, I learned to look at my body as my dearest friend, rather than my most dreaded enemy ("Why can't look like I want you to look?! Why do you have to get fat? Why won't you let me eat everything I want, the way my mother can?!"). This was probably the change that did the most good to my weight loss, and to my life in general. I have put my poor body through soooo much over the years; it's done its very best to preserve itself from my repetitive onslaughts of junk food and inactivity. When you start a weightloss program from a position of loving, or at least respecting, your body, it's amazing what a difference it can make. I choose not to eat french fries because my poor body doesn't deserve such abuse. I choose to keep my weight in check (and pass up on a lot of dessert along the way) because my body does not deserve to have to work extra hard, carrying around excess baggage. I choose to eat food that tastes good to me, and that offers my body the nutrition it needs to keep working well.
My emotional eating came about through anger. I was angry at a lot of things. Anger is a masking emotion. When you begin to dissect it closely, you'll find that it is a reaction to something else altogether: pain, frustration, sadness, impatience, fear, boredom. If you eat something every time you experience a situation that creates one of these emotions, you will be eating a lot!! Emotional eating for other people might have a different dynamic, but this was mine. I think all the sugars and fats helped temporarily lift my mood and made me feel better. But then reality always came crashing back, but now I was a pound or two heavier. So, my problems multiplied. Have you ever heard that expression: "If you keep doing what you've always been doing, you'll keep getting what you've always been getting?" Well, that finally rang true to me. Life was moving along at a rapid pace, and I wasn't making any progress on this issue. What I'd been doing was definitely not working!! I had to break this cycle.
Once I made this realization, combined with the realization that eating all these high-cal, high-fat, high-sugar foods was actually self-abuse and disrespect, I devised a little trick for discerning true hunger from a craving. As I gaze at the cookie calling my name, I ask myself "If this cookie was a carrot, would I still want to eat it?" If the answer is "no", I know that I'm truly not hungry. If the answer is "yes", then I go eat the carrot I have no patience for starvation, but I'm not going to assault my body, either.
The amazing thing is that once you start to see rewards from your lifestyle change, they become their own motivation for continuing. I don't know the reasons behind your compulsive/emotional eating, but I do know that you are not going to make much permanent progress without sensitive (sympathetic) introspection.
This is key: DO NOT feel that you have to have all of your problems, (past, present, and future) resolved before you will be successful at losing weight and overcoming your compulsive eating!
What you have to internalize is this: Everyone has problems, always and forever. "Successful" people (at whatever) are people who know how to LIVE WITH PROBLEMS. In other words, problems remain contained, and do not consume their entire being. A bad day at work does not become a reason to sabotage personal health and fitness, for example. Instead, after a stressful day at work, you come home, growl at the houseplant, drink a smoothie and do IMAX2. By then, the endorphins will have kicked in. If you're still feeling distraught about it, take a few minutes to think about your emotional reaction to the problem (not the problem itself). Ask yourself why you are reacting the way you are. Tune in to the emotions, explore them. Learn something about yourself. The problem won't magically disappear by doing this, but you might be able to ward off a binge.
Jeepers, this has gone on much longer than I anticipated. I truly apologize if it comes across sounding preachy. I am very passionate about wanting to help people become healthier, and am happy to pass on any tidbits of advice I might have gleaned over the years. As you can tell, I can go on and on about this. But, I'll stop for today.
Take care,
Sandra
And Mogambo, thanks for the "perfect answer" remark! I feel like I just aced a test LOL!!
Gosh, I have so much to say about the subject of weight loss, I'm not sure where to start, nor when to stop! I'll try to be succinct.
Yes, I joined WW on July 3, 2002, the day after returning from a 4 day conference where I had the most miserable time of my life, because I was so embarrassed by how much weight I'd gained since the last time I saw all those people (my professional peers!). And yes, I am now a lifetime member, but I stopped attending meetings. I am grateful to WW for being one of the few organizations that endorse and actively support a common-sensical and healthy way to lose weight.
I've been at least slightly overweight ever since puberty. In this regard, I take after my father's family. Ergo, I'm not, nor have ever been, the kind of person who can eat as much as she wants, and doesn't gain a pound. It has taken me 22 years to figure that out, and to fully accept it. Ever since I was 14 I've gained, lost, gained, lost....rinse and repeat.....That largest weight gain came *after* I had my daughter, 4 years ago.
I got pregnant immediately in the fall of 1999, followed immediately be feeling so sick and tired that I stopped exercising, and any pretense of eating healthy went out the window. I ate only what I could choke down, and stopped all my fitness. I slept (it seemed) from Dec 1 to Jan 31. My lovely daughter was born in July, 2000, and I had a bit of baby weight to lose, but not a whole lot. But I was just very, very tired from being a new mom, and recovering from a very difficult birth. At one point I just accepted that I would be large for the rest of my life, and donated away 3 garbage bags full of clothes. So, that brings me back to the conference in June, 2002. I was 70 pounds overweight, and instead of proudly talking to people about my research, and about the book I'd co-authored, I just wanted to hide in my hotel room. The last time they'd all seen me was when I was 8 months pregnant; some people didn't even recognize me.
I began WW, and gradually started back into exercise. You've already read the rest of that story. It took me about 10 months to lose the weight. Along the way, I discovered a lot of things about myself that surprised me. For starters, I learned to look at my body as my dearest friend, rather than my most dreaded enemy ("Why can't look like I want you to look?! Why do you have to get fat? Why won't you let me eat everything I want, the way my mother can?!"). This was probably the change that did the most good to my weight loss, and to my life in general. I have put my poor body through soooo much over the years; it's done its very best to preserve itself from my repetitive onslaughts of junk food and inactivity. When you start a weightloss program from a position of loving, or at least respecting, your body, it's amazing what a difference it can make. I choose not to eat french fries because my poor body doesn't deserve such abuse. I choose to keep my weight in check (and pass up on a lot of dessert along the way) because my body does not deserve to have to work extra hard, carrying around excess baggage. I choose to eat food that tastes good to me, and that offers my body the nutrition it needs to keep working well.
My emotional eating came about through anger. I was angry at a lot of things. Anger is a masking emotion. When you begin to dissect it closely, you'll find that it is a reaction to something else altogether: pain, frustration, sadness, impatience, fear, boredom. If you eat something every time you experience a situation that creates one of these emotions, you will be eating a lot!! Emotional eating for other people might have a different dynamic, but this was mine. I think all the sugars and fats helped temporarily lift my mood and made me feel better. But then reality always came crashing back, but now I was a pound or two heavier. So, my problems multiplied. Have you ever heard that expression: "If you keep doing what you've always been doing, you'll keep getting what you've always been getting?" Well, that finally rang true to me. Life was moving along at a rapid pace, and I wasn't making any progress on this issue. What I'd been doing was definitely not working!! I had to break this cycle.
Once I made this realization, combined with the realization that eating all these high-cal, high-fat, high-sugar foods was actually self-abuse and disrespect, I devised a little trick for discerning true hunger from a craving. As I gaze at the cookie calling my name, I ask myself "If this cookie was a carrot, would I still want to eat it?" If the answer is "no", I know that I'm truly not hungry. If the answer is "yes", then I go eat the carrot
I have no patience for starvation, but I'm not going to assault my body, either. The amazing thing is that once you start to see rewards from your lifestyle change, they become their own motivation for continuing. I don't know the reasons behind your compulsive/emotional eating, but I do know that you are not going to make much permanent progress without sensitive (sympathetic) introspection.
This is key: DO NOT feel that you have to have all of your problems, (past, present, and future) resolved before you will be successful at losing weight and overcoming your compulsive eating!
What you have to internalize is this: Everyone has problems, always and forever. "Successful" people (at whatever) are people who know how to LIVE WITH PROBLEMS. In other words, problems remain contained, and do not consume their entire being. A bad day at work does not become a reason to sabotage personal health and fitness, for example. Instead, after a stressful day at work, you come home, growl at the houseplant, drink a smoothie and do IMAX2. By then, the endorphins will have kicked in. If you're still feeling distraught about it, take a few minutes to think about your emotional reaction to the problem (not the problem itself). Ask yourself why you are reacting the way you are. Tune in to the emotions, explore them. Learn something about yourself. The problem won't magically disappear by doing this, but you might be able to ward off a binge.
Jeepers, this has gone on much longer than I anticipated. I truly apologize if it comes across sounding preachy. I am very passionate about wanting to help people become healthier, and am happy to pass on any tidbits of advice I might have gleaned over the years. As you can tell, I can go on and on about this. But, I'll stop for today.
Take care,
Sandra
dss62467
Cathlete
I noticed today while doing IMAX2 that I was able to get quite a bit higher on the tuck jumps now that I'm 14 lbs. lighter than I was when I started working out in August. I'm not sure if it's the difference in the weight, or because I've gotten more practiced and have more energy. But I did feel almost like my name could be Jai.
Sandra-What a motivating person you are. You truly are a success story. Thank you for the great reply, it wasn't preachy at all. I think I do need to start looking inward instead of trying to mask my emotions with food. I feel that I am never really angry. I just feel overwhelmed. Don't get me wrong I have a wonderful life and I have a lot of gratitude. I think I fall in the trap of doing the same thing over and over again and wishing that my life is going to change. You know my biggest problem is I need to get off my fanny and do something about it instead of dreaming or wishing about it. As far as the binge eating goes, I need to begin some constructive self talk, I like your carrot tip. Sometimes I feel like a drug addict when it comes to food. If my mind is set on some cheeseburgers, I forget that I am on WW, I forget that I am trying to stop eating out of emotion until I am done with the meal. And like you said, now I have 2 problems instead of one. I think I have some pain from my childhood and just general insecurities and I comfort myself with food. Tomorrow is another day and I am going to start making an effort to change the way I deal with my problems. Obviously what I am doing is not constructive. I cannot live the rest of my life like this. Thank you again for the helpful words, you really helped me a lot. I will keep you updated on my progress.
Lori
Lori
FiddleFit
Cathlete
Donna, HIGH FIVE on the tuck jumps! How much do you want to bet that in IMAX3 Cathe actually tells us to hold the jump in the air for five counts LOL!! Yes, losing 14 pounds would make a noticeable difference on doing these! If you're not convinced, next time put 14 pounds of ankle and wrists weights on and see for yourself (my gosh! That feel awful).
Lori, thank you for sharing all these difficult problems with me. Feeling overwhelmed can be paralyzing; like being a deer caught in headlights. It also means that you feel out of control of your own life. And it all adds up to feeling stressed. Maybe that's what the list needs: a forum topic on constructively dealing with stress.
Yes, merely wishing your life will change won't actually change it. Were it so easy, hey? What is your biggest priority? What do you want to change the most?
If you're trying to change deeply ingrained behaviours, you need to address it from three vantages. You need something to *push* you away from the undesired behaviour, and you need something to *pull* you towards a new, desired behaviour. And then you need a safety net underneath you, for making the jump in between. Otherwise, you will end up back where you started. It would not be a prudent idea to simply decide that, starting right now, you are no longer going to eat "junk food", period, end of story. You need to plan ahead of time what you are going to do when a junk food craving hits. Just wishing(or "resolving") away the cravings won't work. They will come back, and the will keep coming back, until you tune into the specific triggers (they can be physical and emotional), and provide a better alternative behaviour, something you can live with and ideally enjoy. Chances are this is going to be an ongoing process, where you will sporadically give in to the cravings. Ideally, you will examine each of these instances in search of what the trigger was, and why you were not able to ward it off. Learn from it; make a specific plan for the next time. Do NOT beat yourself up and feel guilty about it! You are a human being just like the rest of us. We all make regretful decisions, but somehow the Rest of the World continues to let us live. I don't expect perfection from any other human being in the world, so I stopped expecting it from myself (see "Treat yourself like you would your best friend" . And realistically, guilt is a useless emotion, except to continue to paralyze you. Once you've eaten the cheeseburger, you've eaten the cheeseburger. Consider the experience fresh data for your personal research project, add it to the rest, and see if you can learn anything new. Highly ingrained behaviours are not likely to end overnight. More likely you will see a pattern of less frequency over the long term, maybe punctuated with increased frequency during difficult times. Give yourself time to change(it may even take a year or more), expect setbacks, anticipate trouble, and don't expect perfection. Just keep picking yourself up and moving forward. You never fail at something until you quit.
One more thing that came to my mind last night deals with the self-respect issue. Most "Diets" and "dieters" have a tone to them of self-punishment. "I'm going on this diet because I've been bad and therefore do not deserve to eat *** food." It becomes focused around what you are "not allowed" to eat. Nutritious eating, on the other hand, takes the complete opposite approach. People who eat nutritiously say something more along the lines of "What can I give my body today that will make me feel great, and keep my body healthy?" It's about what you "want" to eat, for both taste and health. It might take a while to change your taste buds so that you actually enjoy whole grains and vegetables, and less sugar and saturated fats, but my experience with that has been of the tempo I described above; I made gradual changes, and didn't go straight from A to Z, but stopped at every letter in between. Sometimes went backwards. Two years later, I can't imagine eating what I used to. It makes me shudder. But I sure enjoyed it then!!! You CAN change.
I am not an expert in any capacity on the issues underlying compulsive eating. I would encourage you to read up on the topic, and learn as much as you can about how others have dealt with it, what their challenges were, and how they overcame them. While you're doing all that, you can get started simply by becoming consciously aware of what happens when you find yourself eating that cheeseburger. The next time it happens, once you're back into your normal frame of mind, sit down, and without self-anger, regret or guilt, document the entire situation. It might surprise you where your mind goes, and what kinds of things surface. Then, pat yourself on the back for having made the first step in what might be a long journey. ("A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"; "You can only eat an elephant one bite at a time").
Practical healthy eating tip of the day: always carry a healthy snack in your bag with you, so you won't be forced to use a vending machine or be so starving you head for a fast food joint, if unexpected hunger hits. Eating an extra 2-points bar one afternoon is much better than eating an entire cheeseburger and fries.
Okay! This ends another Long Lecture By Sandra. No, this will not be on the test
Sandra
Lori, thank you for sharing all these difficult problems with me. Feeling overwhelmed can be paralyzing; like being a deer caught in headlights. It also means that you feel out of control of your own life. And it all adds up to feeling stressed. Maybe that's what the list needs: a forum topic on constructively dealing with stress.
Yes, merely wishing your life will change won't actually change it. Were it so easy, hey? What is your biggest priority? What do you want to change the most?
If you're trying to change deeply ingrained behaviours, you need to address it from three vantages. You need something to *push* you away from the undesired behaviour, and you need something to *pull* you towards a new, desired behaviour. And then you need a safety net underneath you, for making the jump in between. Otherwise, you will end up back where you started. It would not be a prudent idea to simply decide that, starting right now, you are no longer going to eat "junk food", period, end of story. You need to plan ahead of time what you are going to do when a junk food craving hits. Just wishing(or "resolving") away the cravings won't work. They will come back, and the will keep coming back, until you tune into the specific triggers (they can be physical and emotional), and provide a better alternative behaviour, something you can live with and ideally enjoy. Chances are this is going to be an ongoing process, where you will sporadically give in to the cravings. Ideally, you will examine each of these instances in search of what the trigger was, and why you were not able to ward it off. Learn from it; make a specific plan for the next time. Do NOT beat yourself up and feel guilty about it! You are a human being just like the rest of us. We all make regretful decisions, but somehow the Rest of the World continues to let us live
. I don't expect perfection from any other human being in the world, so I stopped expecting it from myself (see "Treat yourself like you would your best friend" . And realistically, guilt is a useless emotion, except to continue to paralyze you. Once you've eaten the cheeseburger, you've eaten the cheeseburger. Consider the experience fresh data for your personal research project, add it to the rest, and see if you can learn anything new. Highly ingrained behaviours are not likely to end overnight. More likely you will see a pattern of less frequency over the long term, maybe punctuated with increased frequency during difficult times. Give yourself time to change(it may even take a year or more), expect setbacks, anticipate trouble, and don't expect perfection. Just keep picking yourself up and moving forward. You never fail at something until you quit.One more thing that came to my mind last night deals with the self-respect issue. Most "Diets" and "dieters" have a tone to them of self-punishment. "I'm going on this diet because I've been bad and therefore do not deserve to eat *** food." It becomes focused around what you are "not allowed" to eat. Nutritious eating, on the other hand, takes the complete opposite approach. People who eat nutritiously say something more along the lines of "What can I give my body today that will make me feel great, and keep my body healthy?" It's about what you "want" to eat, for both taste and health. It might take a while to change your taste buds so that you actually enjoy whole grains and vegetables, and less sugar and saturated fats, but my experience with that has been of the tempo I described above; I made gradual changes, and didn't go straight from A to Z, but stopped at every letter in between. Sometimes went backwards. Two years later, I can't imagine eating what I used to. It makes me shudder. But I sure enjoyed it then!!! You CAN change.
I am not an expert in any capacity on the issues underlying compulsive eating. I would encourage you to read up on the topic, and learn as much as you can about how others have dealt with it, what their challenges were, and how they overcame them. While you're doing all that, you can get started simply by becoming consciously aware of what happens when you find yourself eating that cheeseburger. The next time it happens, once you're back into your normal frame of mind, sit down, and without self-anger, regret or guilt, document the entire situation. It might surprise you where your mind goes, and what kinds of things surface. Then, pat yourself on the back for having made the first step in what might be a long journey. ("A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"; "You can only eat an elephant one bite at a time").
Practical healthy eating tip of the day: always carry a healthy snack in your bag with you, so you won't be forced to use a vending machine or be so starving you head for a fast food joint, if unexpected hunger hits. Eating an extra 2-points bar one afternoon is much better than eating an entire cheeseburger and fries.
Okay! This ends another Long Lecture By Sandra. No, this will not be on the test
Sandra
Sandra-Again, thanks for the wisdom! I am looking around for books on the compulsive eating subject. I have found a couple on Barnesandnoble.com that seem really good. You are right, you must have a plan to succeed. Thanks for all of your great advice and tips, they are really appreciated and I will employ some of these tips and wisdom you have given. I had a great day today. There were a couple times when I wanted to break into the peanut butter jar, but I managed to refocus and make a cup of tea instead. I will keep you posted.
Lori
Lori