Overweight kids...need your advice

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Imafitnessfreak

Cathlete
O.k., so my mom calls me today needing my help. She is raising my niece (her granddaughter). She calls and says Hannah is getting heavy...fat around the belly. She will be 9 years old in a few weeks. I know what the problem is so I told my mom "Your kitchen is jam packed with crap". She agreed. I gave her better food choices and she took notes and became so excited to grocery shop.

Here is where I need advice...my mom doesn't want my Hannah to know she is trying to get her to eat healthier. Hannah eats ice cream everyday...sometimes twice! INSANE!! She asks my mom to buy it for her all the time. What should my mom say?

I told her to say "Hannah, grandma and grandpa need to start eating better and we need to keep that stuff out of the house because we cannot be trusted"...partially true! Any other tips? We are trying to avoid turning Hannah off and make her feel self conscious.
 
What about fat free yogurt instead of the ice cream? Maybe she can make her some healthy fruit smoothies in place of the ice cream instead?
 
My bestest friend has an overweight daughter. Her DD is a bit insecure about it, though, I don't know if Hannah is. BF got her a book that it is by Amercian Girl. It is called "The Care and Keeping of You." I have never read it but know that BF is really pleased by it. She also taught her DD, who is 8 now, how to read labels so that she can "nourish her body and give it what it needs to grow and stay healthy" (in those words). She also taught her about fat and sugar content and why too much is bad for you. She started eating the same way her daughter did, and so did her other children and DH, so that they could all be healthy together. They have never eaten any junk in front of her and not let her have any. They take her out every once in a while for a date and she can get whatever she wants, so she still gets her brownies, or ice cream, but she is doing it so seldom that it doesn't hurt her.

I am amazed that your mom is so eager to change! That is so awesome! So many people just sweep this under the rug and pretend there isn't a problem, or know there is a problem but are too lazy to do anything about it.

HIH,
Missy
 
That's so awesome that your mother is eager about getting her to eat healthier. It's so much better to establish good eating patterns early in life rather than try to break bad eating habits later. Aside from the snacks, does your mother also cook meals at home? Maybe you can get your mother a cookbook for healthy balanced meals. If everyone in the household is eating better it would be less likely that Hannah would suspect that the changes are due to her.

By the way, does Hannah do anything for exercise? Maybe your mom can sign her up for something like dance class, gymnastics, or soccer just to help her burn off those extra calories. Don't we know what that's like LOL.
 
I failed to mention that Hannah is a competitive gymnast (not Olympic "crazy" competitive but a healthy level of seriousness LOL). She always "places" during competition.

My mom is a horrible cook and doesn't know much about healthy eating. Her DH eats so much crap it makes me sick! Donuts, cookies, candy, cake, chips...if it's junk, he has a fistful! It's gross! He isn't overweight but my mom said they just bought him bigger clothes because he grew out of his other wardrobe!

I LOVE the healthy eating cookbook! Keep the suggestions coming! I can get her the book for Mothers' Day! What are some good ones?
 
She can always substitute real pasta with low carb pasta. Honestly, my kids or anyone else for that matter can taste the difference. Lasagne is really a good one to make because the ricotta cheese is not gonna hurt anyone as there is alot of protein there and is used alot on the South Beach Diet.
Raw Fruit dipped in yogurt.
Soy Crisps chips which you can find at Costco's. I don't know where else you can get them. They come in a variety of flavors and very tasty.
Can't think of anything else for the moment, but hope that helps.

Charlotte~~
 
That was a good reason. Why not tell her that ice cream isn't healthy and that we need to start eating healthier. Kids won't read much into that. My daughter always ask me how come I run and I tell her its to keep me healthy, which is true but the main reason I started running was b/c I wanted to drop some weight that I had gained.
Lucky for me we don't have this problem.My daugther is 9 as well and there are times when we can't get any food in to her, which is not so good. She is very long and lean.
My running partner as issues with her daugther though.They can't keep her eating under control and she is going to turn out like her fathers side of the family.Very blocky.I haven't heard her say much about it lately.
How do you put a child on a diet? And if you do, does this set them up with years of bad body image and yo-yo dieting? Its really hard to know what to do.
And another thing, if she isn't that much over weight I wouldn't worry about it to much b/c she will probably lean out as she gets taller, alot of kids do.
Good Luck,
Lori
P.S tell your mom to enroll her into some summer activites.Soccer and baseball are some good choices
 
If my kids want ice cream and I'm in the mood to compromise I offer them soy milk with frozen fruit, blitz in the blender, put the (soft) frozen mixture in a bowl, hand them a spoon and voila... If they insist on ice cream and start being obnoxious, they can go to their room till they can behave and get nothing. I'm the adult in the house, and I decide on the (junk) food they get.

Dutchie:)
 
It might also be important to remember that her body is changing right now. My daughter will be 10 in a few weeks and I've noticed it in her. Even though she has always been thin and stays away from junk food (most of the time ~ apple dippers instead of french fries, sugar free popsicles instead of ice cream, etc.) ~ I have noticed her body changing this past year more than any other. She's becoming curvier and is also beginning to have some things poke out here and there :+ . Anyway, those tween years can be awkward. Do you have any idea what size your neice is in or how much she weighs? My daughter has just discovered that size 8's are too small and she began obsessing about it. It was horrible. I had to take her out to buy new 10's, while consoling her that a 10 year old SHOULD be wearing size 10's! Lots of things are happening inside of 9 and 10 year old bodies!

Sarah
 
Good parenting involves setting limits and sticking to them and also teaching via example.

There is no reason on earth to suppose the child will suddenly become excessively body conscious just because certain foods disappear from the house and are brought out only on a treat basis rather than a daily occurence.

I am sure this child is smart. She is old enough to receive explanations of what a healthy diet means and what foods groups it involves. She probably has already touched upon these issues at school. She deserves information, adults taking the time to teach her things, educate her about a healthy life style. It need not be done in a "preachy" way.

The care givers must lead by example, it is the best way for kids to learn, and also the most uncomplicated. The crap leaves the house, simple. Someone has to start home cooking and fruits and vegetables must be main stays at each meal. The child still can have options: she gets to choose which fruit she has with her yoghurt for dessert.

She may throw a paddy to start with when refused ice cream, and the care givers have to stand firm here, but she will get over it soon enough. Kids are nothing if not flexible and it's just tough, that's all. You have to say "no" to kids and they will accept it. Being a good parent means you will make them hate you sometimes, it doesn't last. You have to thwart some of their desires if you want to do good by them. Permissive parenting does nothing good for them at all, regardless of the behaviours in which they are being allowed to indulge. Here it is letting her eat whatever crap she wants.

The book "The care and keeping of you" by the American Girl company is fabulous. My 11 year old has a copy and thumbs it regularly. It will back up and confirm all that her care givers, if they are really taking their parenting duties seriously, will now be telling her.

Clare
 
Clare,

I'm assuming a "paddy" is not a good thing, LOL!

I agree with everything Clare said. Soy has estrogenic properties. Don't you need to be careful of how much soy you give a young girl? I don't know...I'm just asking.

I am experiencing the same thing with my granddaughter. She just turned nine and is getting a bit of a belly. My mother has always used food for affection. DG spends quite a bit of time with her. I've talked to my Mom about all the junk she makes available for DG but to no avail. She buys all kinds of candy, ice cream, sugary juices. It makes me crazy. At least your Mom is attempting to take action so that's a good thing.
 
Candi:

"throw a paddy" = "throw a hissy fit"

Sorry, sometimes my native expressions will out regardless of my audience! Like I can never say "trunk" for the car, it has to be the "boot" and I have no idea what you call the front part. Some phrases and expressions and words that you use just won't come out of my mouth! I can't say "panties", it makes me cringe so much! Funny......

Clare
 
I love how people from the UK talk. I work with a mechanical engineer that is from England. I just asked him what it meant and he said it related to the Irish. Paddy = as to show your Irish temper.

I love it!

What do you say in lieu of panties?
 
In our home, we call clean food "strong food" - my girls are 4 and 5 and seem to get it. If they ask for a treat, I always have them eat some strong food first - cheese, apple, etc. I think it fills them up first and maybe absorbs some of the bad stuff, too! I'm just happy they always ask first.
 
Dayna- I love that "strong food" idea!!! My girls (2,4,6) are always watching and absorbing everything I do and say and I have become very aware of how my actions may affect them. To this end, I hid my scale (I used to weigh myself every morning until I noticed them watching). They ask why I do Cathe, and I tell them to be strong and healthy. They know what foods are healthy, but I think it would be more appealing to call them "strong foods". Thanks for sharing that.
Tracy
 
Two more ideas: Maybe your mom and your niece can learn how to cook a few healthy recipes together. (I've seen this suggestion on a few TV shows about healthy eating.) Certainly a 9-year-old can cut or peel veggies under adult supervision, measure things, stir things. They could pick out the recipe together, learn about better food choices, etc--it gets her to feel that she has some control over this sudden change in eating habits and that it's not something just being done to her. Plus, she and your mother can learn about healthy food choices together, since your mom seems to also need to learn this.

Other thought is maybe your mom can take after-school or before-dinner walks with your niece? Don't know if that's feasible for them or not, but it could be their time together--no pressure to lose weight or really workout hard, but just a way to get more exercise in and be healthier. Maybe they could take an aerobics class together? I did that with my mom for years, and it was really special to me.

Hope this helps! Just a few ideas. :)
 
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