Leaving
- Thread starter Kimenem
- Start date
dreamyjeanie
Cathlete
Unfortunately forums, no matter what site, can get ugly at times. Sometimes meaning and feeling is lost or is taken the wrong way when it is written and not spoken. Sometimes people just don't think before they hit the send button. Cathe's forum are no exception. In my opinion her's are probably one of the least radical. There is a wealth of information on these forums. My recommendation would be to take the good, ignore the bad. If ones feeling get hurt by a response, know that it is not truly personally, because they don't "Know you". It would be nice if everyone could respond with tact and class, but that just not going to happen. Hopefully one receives enough positive responses on here to out weigh the bad. When people do respond with tact and class, I think it spreads and more people respond in a more accepting way. Leaving is not the answer. Trying to keep the forums positive is.
Jean
Jean
Yes, I did think about not posting anymore after I had so many comments about saying plastic surgery was shallow. I live in a northern community of many poor toothless people, so I didn't think it was common for people to be for it.
I am a softie for sure, but I also have a strong will, so I will just stand right back up.
I love this forum for all the great information and friendships I have made.
I am a softie for sure, but I also have a strong will, so I will just stand right back up.
I love this forum for all the great information and friendships I have made.
cataddict
Cathlete
Kim,
I didn't answer when you initially posted since I wanted to think about how I responded. I've been a member of this forum since way way back but my post count shows that I've mostly lurked over the years. This is a forum run by an instructor, and for that reason I at least attempt to be very careful how and what I post about that instructor in particular. There are people here who seem to think it is incumbent upon them to defend Cathe to the death against any comment they perceive as negative or critical. There are also great people here who are Cathe fans and who feel a bond with her and with other members. These two groups are not mutually exclusive. And so, I lurk more than post, and gratefully enjoy the benefit of the experience and wisdom when it is shared and try to avoid the drama.
I didn't answer when you initially posted since I wanted to think about how I responded. I've been a member of this forum since way way back but my post count shows that I've mostly lurked over the years. This is a forum run by an instructor, and for that reason I at least attempt to be very careful how and what I post about that instructor in particular. There are people here who seem to think it is incumbent upon them to defend Cathe to the death against any comment they perceive as negative or critical. There are also great people here who are Cathe fans and who feel a bond with her and with other members. These two groups are not mutually exclusive. And so, I lurk more than post, and gratefully enjoy the benefit of the experience and wisdom when it is shared and try to avoid the drama.
Jonezie
Cathlete
Kim, if 93-97% of communication is nonverbal, it is unfortunate that we're not able to see the other people on this forum...and read their non-verbal cues. I think a lot of misunderstandings would be avoided. I know I've written some things that people took in a way that was completely opposite of the way I intended. They were more a reflection of how I talk with my friends, family and people who really know and love me.
There was an entire Sex and the City episode devoted to this. Where Carrie does a photo shoot for a cover that she thinks is going to read "Single...and FABULOUS!!!," when actually it reads "Single...and fabulous???"
I think we sometimes (I do, at least) feel a false sense of security here...that we are surrounded by people that know exactly what brought us to the present moment. I have to remind myself sometimes that we really are having an Internet relationship. I mean, if I sat next to a fellow Cathlete on the train, I wouldn't know it. And let's face it...some of the people who have the biggest arguments here would probably be friends in "real life."
It's hard not to take things personally, and often harder to stand up for what you believe. But aside from the ridiculous and needless drama that sometimes goes on, I think we really do each other a great service. The people who disagree with us actually help us define who we are, what we will (and will not) stand for. My feelings have been really hurt by some of the remarks posted on The Cathe Nation, and I'm sure some people have felt hurt by my comments. But I'm grateful, even for the comments that seem beastly and bullying. Because they make me think about issues in a much deeper way. And help me define who I am. At the end of the day, all I can do is try to have a sense of humor about it and find ways that we are alike, instead of different. We are a strong, amazing group of women.
PS...For every one person who makes you feel bullied, not listened to, invisible, stupid, or any other miserable feeling...there are 100 of us here to support you. And most of the time, the person who made you feel that way didn't mean to...and will try to repair the mistake.
See you around the forum, friend!
Jonezie
There was an entire Sex and the City episode devoted to this. Where Carrie does a photo shoot for a cover that she thinks is going to read "Single...and FABULOUS!!!," when actually it reads "Single...and fabulous???"
I think we sometimes (I do, at least) feel a false sense of security here...that we are surrounded by people that know exactly what brought us to the present moment. I have to remind myself sometimes that we really are having an Internet relationship. I mean, if I sat next to a fellow Cathlete on the train, I wouldn't know it. And let's face it...some of the people who have the biggest arguments here would probably be friends in "real life."
It's hard not to take things personally, and often harder to stand up for what you believe. But aside from the ridiculous and needless drama that sometimes goes on, I think we really do each other a great service. The people who disagree with us actually help us define who we are, what we will (and will not) stand for. My feelings have been really hurt by some of the remarks posted on The Cathe Nation, and I'm sure some people have felt hurt by my comments. But I'm grateful, even for the comments that seem beastly and bullying. Because they make me think about issues in a much deeper way. And help me define who I am. At the end of the day, all I can do is try to have a sense of humor about it and find ways that we are alike, instead of different. We are a strong, amazing group of women.
PS...For every one person who makes you feel bullied, not listened to, invisible, stupid, or any other miserable feeling...there are 100 of us here to support you. And most of the time, the person who made you feel that way didn't mean to...and will try to repair the mistake.
See you around the forum, friend!
Jonezie
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caseysmomgo
Cathlete
Kim, I've mostly lurked on here for awhile but do post occasionally. I've sometimes thought of leaving because of hurtful things I've read, not anything directed at me, but just directed at others on this forum. However, as Jonezie most eloquently put it, the vast majority of people on here have our backs, and the information I've gotten on this forum is amazing.
Jonezie, you are truly an asset to this forum and I really appreciate your well-worded, tactful posts. (By the way, your blog is hilarious! You need to write a book.)
Peace all,
Jonezie, you are truly an asset to this forum and I really appreciate your well-worded, tactful posts. (By the way, your blog is hilarious! You need to write a book.)
Peace all,
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Jonezie
Cathlete
Kim...I'm filled with glee to know you are staying!
Denise...you are soooooo sweet! I am honored that you think that. I would love to get paid to sit in my jammies and write
. But first I think I should lose the 60 pounds. It would not be hilarious to show up at a book signing weighing my "before" weight. It seems to be going soooooo slow lately. I'm glad Morningstar got us thinking about the mental roadblocks associated with the 3500 calorie idea. You know who has done an amazing job of keeping the weight off? Sandra (Ellesan). Have you been to her blog? She looks AMAZING! She lost (and kept off) 100 pounds.
Hey Denise...this is a stupid question but please keep in mind what a dog lover I am...is Casey a dog? A Golden Retriever? If so, we must talk Golden sometime! If not, so sorry I just called your son a Golden Retriever.
(PS...I'm Willoughby the Shih Tzu's mom. He is a BIG Cathe fan,too. It means he gets to work out at home with me).
RapidBreath
Cathlete
Awww! Its ok, you can stay, we'll be good!
I for one am a frequent poster with perhaps a minor posting problem (ahem.)
I think it would be a pity if you left. I don't think that there is anything wrong with having a difference of opinion and saying so.
I'm probably not popular all the time, I am just too dumb to notice
I for one am a frequent poster with perhaps a minor posting problem (ahem.)
I think it would be a pity if you left. I don't think that there is anything wrong with having a difference of opinion and saying so.
I'm probably not popular all the time, I am just too dumb to notice
ldy_solana
Cathlete
do you have a link? love to take a look and maybe put it on my yahoo feed.
kim
i have thought about leaving but what's that gonna prove. i either leave the post alone b/c sometimes if you try to respond you feed the fire, otherwise sometimes there is a misunderstanding in my posts that i feel i need to clear up. if beyond that the person/s seem to still want to come negatively to me then that is their issue not mine.
thanks
kassia
Jonezie
Cathlete
ldy_solana
Cathlete
thanks jonezie
kassia
kassia
jcm
Cathlete
sometimes the stuff i see posted on the internet is ... wow. not so much here, but youtube and the like. maybe when people can say things anonymously it gives them the freedom to say what they normally never would. but doesn't it go way to ... if you don't have anything nice to say (or write) maybe you just shouldn't.
caseysmomgo
Cathlete
Hey Denise...this is a stupid question but please keep in mind what a dog lover I am...is Casey a dog? A Golden Retriever? If so, we must talk Golden sometime! If not, so sorry I just called your son a Golden Retriever.
LOL... Jonezie, Casey's my Yellow Lab! I have to work out in the basement where he's not around (Casey refuses to go down there for reasons unknown to me!), because when I work out he thinks I'm "in distress" and tries to lick me and stop me from exercising... What a guy....
Jonezie
Cathlete
LOL! Hooray! A fellow dog mom! I was gonna say yellow lab second, but the thumbnail looks a lot like my neighbor's Golden.
Willoughby konks (SP?) out during my workouts. He's like "Peace out...wake me when you're finished."
As for Casey in the basement...smart dog. He's obviously watched enough horror films to know nothing good ever happens in the basement.
Except Cathe workouts! Talk to you soon! Jonezie