Holiday Woes

[Timber99]

I *love* Christmas. I love decorating, shopping, giving presents, cooking, eating ( ) being with family, everything. I don't even mind the 300+ mile commute to be with my family! What I do mind is year after year, hearing my mother complain about how she "hates the holidays" and how I have to "pick one big gift" because she "isn't going crazy and shopping!" We go to relatives' houses, so it isn't like she is still in the cooking and having people over mode (which does make it that much more work) but still, she finds a way to complain constantly.

It is just *so* disheartening to listen to this year after year (it's already started for this year) and I have tried every approach possible. This morning, I very politely told her that she says it every year and that she's a downer. I told her how much I love Christmas and that she might not, but I really can't understand how she is already in complain mode about it. I'd rather not receive anything from her if I have to listen to that!

Any suggestions?

 

[miller2917]

I think you said it all this morning. What more can you do. Maybe tell her how much you love her and that it would make you so happy to see her happy on Christmas. And that your willing to do what she needs to make her happy at Christmastime

 

[darli ann]

My mom does the exact same thing and has for years. And you're right, it does ruin the fun for everyone else when there's a scrooge in the house. You were right to tell her how it makes you feel, wish I had the guts to do that too. I rarely go to her house at Christmas because she's a thousand miles away and I believe she prefers to have as few people there as possible so I guess we're all happier with that arrangement. :-(

 

[janiejoey]

Christine,

You politely said it, and that was big of you. Now lets see what she does with that information at Christmas. Just pretend to yourself (before Christmas arrives) that she will be just fine, and no downers this year. Be positive and have a great time with your lovely family this year.

Merry Christmas,

Janie
The idea is to die young as late as possible.

 

[Mocha]

Is it mostly the shopping she complains about, or is it everything? If it's mostly shopping, maybe suggest some alternative gift-giving strategies that could be a little easier for her to deal with.

I know you said you'd tried every approach already, so maybe you've been there/done that. Hope you find something to help her feel the Holiday Spirit a little more this year!