Does anyone have a living will?

M

Maximus

Cathlete
I did my CPR certification last night & all the talk of DNR got me thinking. I've heard different things about a living will. Some people think if you have one then you could go into the hospital w/the flu & they'll let you die so they can use your eyes for a senator.

But then on the other hand, no one really knows what happens when you're comatose or whatever, & I'd hate to think if I ever went into a coma my brain would still be working while my body wasn't.

Thoughts on this?
 
I did my CPR certification last night & all the talk of DNR got me thinking. I've heard different things about a living will. Some people think if you have one then you could go into the hospital w/the flu & they'll let you die so they can use your eyes for a senator.

But then on the other hand, no one really knows what happens when you're comatose or whatever, & I'd hate to think if I ever went into a coma my brain would still be working while my body wasn't.

Thoughts on this?
 
Uh, Maximus, exactly what birthday are you celebrating today? Your 80th??

Being in Canada, our laws may different here regarding how to interpret a living will, but generally I support them. With current technology allowing life to be artifically prolonged, I think we need to be able to make our own preferences known and respected.

Cheers,
Sandra
 
Uh, Maximus, exactly what birthday are you celebrating today? Your 80th??

Being in Canada, our laws may different here regarding how to interpret a living will, but generally I support them. With current technology allowing life to be artifically prolonged, I think we need to be able to make our own preferences known and respected.

Cheers,
Sandra
 
I live in MA and here, you can have a "Health Care Proxy" and/or a DNR. I have the HCP, which allows BF to make the decisions for me if I am unable to make them myself.

I want to be kept alive if there is one iota of faith that I may survive. Personally, I do not have enough faith in the medical profession to believe that they know "for sure" that I will live or die and I want every opportunity to keep on truckin'!

BF knows that this is how I feel but I really need to sit down and have a more serious discussion with him to make sure that he would make this decisions "my way" and not "his way."

I am a lawyer, so maybe I am tainted about future planning, but I would rather tell you know how I feel while I can think about it and I am able, than put that decision off on someone else later. It's hard enogh to make that decision, even if you are following strict instructions that the person gave you, let alone if you have no guidance from that person. Plus your family may have difference beliefs than you in what to do in a given situation.
 
I live in MA and here, you can have a "Health Care Proxy" and/or a DNR. I have the HCP, which allows BF to make the decisions for me if I am unable to make them myself.

I want to be kept alive if there is one iota of faith that I may survive. Personally, I do not have enough faith in the medical profession to believe that they know "for sure" that I will live or die and I want every opportunity to keep on truckin'!

BF knows that this is how I feel but I really need to sit down and have a more serious discussion with him to make sure that he would make this decisions "my way" and not "his way."

I am a lawyer, so maybe I am tainted about future planning, but I would rather tell you know how I feel while I can think about it and I am able, than put that decision off on someone else later. It's hard enogh to make that decision, even if you are following strict instructions that the person gave you, let alone if you have no guidance from that person. Plus your family may have difference beliefs than you in what to do in a given situation.
 
I don't have one at the moment but I do intend to get a living will at some point.

My grandfather and father had one and it really makes it easier on the family when a loved one is sick. I hate to see families torn apart over what to do with a sick loved one when it is sooo important for the family to stick together in times like that.

My father stated in his that he only wished to be on life support for a period of 3 days...beyond that he wanted to be taken off. If he could survive on his own after that, wonderful, if not, he wished to be allowed to pass...

My grandfather stated that he did not want any means of resuscitation (spelling?) performed on him if he passed away...he just wanted to be allowed to go as well...

In both cases the wills came in to play and relieved my family of the "torture" of deciding what to do and trying to AGREE on a decision....

IMO I think they are an excellent idea.

~Wendy~

I smoked my last cigarette on March 17, 2004 at 10:00 pm!

http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?WENDYMIN

http://lilypie.com/days/050519/1/0/1/-5/.png[/img][/url]
 
I don't have one at the moment but I do intend to get a living will at some point.

My grandfather and father had one and it really makes it easier on the family when a loved one is sick. I hate to see families torn apart over what to do with a sick loved one when it is sooo important for the family to stick together in times like that.

My father stated in his that he only wished to be on life support for a period of 3 days...beyond that he wanted to be taken off. If he could survive on his own after that, wonderful, if not, he wished to be allowed to pass...

My grandfather stated that he did not want any means of resuscitation (spelling?) performed on him if he passed away...he just wanted to be allowed to go as well...

In both cases the wills came in to play and relieved my family of the "torture" of deciding what to do and trying to AGREE on a decision....

IMO I think they are an excellent idea.

~Wendy~

I smoked my last cigarette on March 17, 2004 at 10:00 pm!

http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?WENDYMIN

http://lilypie.com/days/050519/1/0/1/-5/.png[/img][/url]
 
DH and I have a Living Will and we both chose DNR. I believe you can word the Living Will exactly the way you want but I may be wrong. Maybe a lawyer or two will chime in here.

Nancy324, where are you?
 
DH and I have a Living Will and we both chose DNR. I believe you can word the Living Will exactly the way you want but I may be wrong. Maybe a lawyer or two will chime in here.

Nancy324, where are you?
 
Yes, my husband and I both do. Also, we have designated each other as our proxies. I'm also an organ donor, but I don't know if he is.

Your lawyer can take care of setting up a living will for you.
 
Yes, my husband and I both do. Also, we have designated each other as our proxies. I'm also an organ donor, but I don't know if he is.

Your lawyer can take care of setting up a living will for you.
 
Yes I have a living will as well as what to do with my stuff. I'm 25, it is really a good idea at any age, you never know what will happen tomorrow and you really need to protect your love ones. This really isn't a document for you, but to protect them. Why make them pay for million dollar hospital bill, if you get in an accident and end up on life support but you didn't want to be put on that? You can only protect yourself from you, but you can't protect yourself from others. There is always that drunk, the road rage manic, the psycho with a bomb, just look at what happen to all those people in the world trade center, most of them were somewhere between 20 and 50 years of age. And a lot of their love ones got screw from the goverment, because they didn't have a living will. The goverment took taxes on everything they owned and charged their family for it. Just like if you die today, your family doesn't get your stuff free and clear, they have to pay for it. That document isn't to prepare you to die, it's a just in case at least I did my job to protect my love ones and not put them in debt over my death. But seriously if you have kids set up a living will and a trust fund for them, even if you never have to use it, they'll have money when they grow up and really need it, as not only does it grow with what you put in, it grows with interest.

As think about, turn on the news and see how many accidents and deaths you hear about. Do you think those people were preparing to die or wanted to? I'm pretty sure you'll answer NO to that question, but they didn't have the power over it, someone killed them, and now their family is left with out them. This is what the true use of a will is for, you can make sure your kids have enough money and still go in the direction they want to go in. As when your dead it's a bit hard to go to work and bring home money to feed the kids. But if you make arrangments just in case your run into a problem that is deadly, everyone is covered and granted they'll suffer with the loss for ever, they at least will be provided for. As this is why I have one, it isn't my stuff I care about who gets it or not I just want to make sure that the kids can get it and the goverment won't charge them an arm and leg for it, as well as the fact I want to make sure that if I'm gone there is always food on the table, they have a change to go to college, to have everything I can give them being alive, even if I do end up dead, for whatever reason. And depending on your state you may have to have an offical living will not just what you wrote down on some piece of paper that you see done in the movies.

Anyway if you want to do one, go for it. It's not like it's going to hurt you or your family.

Kit
 
As Timber pointed out, there are actually 2 documents: A living will and a health care proxy. The living will sets forth your wishes and instructions. The proxy names the person you designate to carry out such wishes. You can have one without the other. Unless a client specifically wants otherwise, I usually give them a combined document.

Although I push them on everyone who comes in to do a Will, these days if you go to have, say, a colonoscopy, the office where you have it done will usually offer you one to sign before you go in. I have reviewed such documents and think they are generally fine, and tend to be in compliance with legal requirements. I am just mentioning this because, obviously, they are free. There are also some websites that have perfectly decent documents, such as http://www.partnershipforcaring.org/HomePage/

Now how's that for free legal advice?

-Nancy
 
Yes, I have both a Living Will. My family knows about my wishes also. I don't want to be kept alive on life support if my prognosis is bleak. I'd rather die.

As far as comatose patients, I believe Doctors use something called a Glasgow Coma Scale to determine if a patient is officially "brain dead", at least that's the way they used to determine this at the last hospital I worked at.

Good luck with your decision. It looks like there are some good responses here. Your doctor's office should be able to provide you with these forms also. Just ask them for them if you decide you want them. I've had mine filled out for years. You never know when you might need them.
 
Yes. Absolutely. My DH passed away this past September after a long, tough battle with leukemia. I tried several times, while he was still successfully battling this cancer, to get him to write up a will and a living well, as well as singing a DNR, or at least TELL me what he wanted me to do...if it got to that. Needless to say, it got to that point. I had the HORRIBLE decision of deciding what to do. They had to put him on a ventilator one day because he caught pneumonia and couldn't breath on his own anymore. Because he didn't have anything in writing, I was his wife and therefore the deciding factor in what to do. We have 2 young boys (4 and 7) and this was the absolute HARDEST thing I have EVER had to do in my life (I'm 33 and so was DH). DH's parents and sister tried to persuade me in one direction, as well as his oncologist. It was not a unanomous (sp?) decision and I caught a LOT of heat for my decision.

After all this, I went straight to my attorney, drew up a will, assigned legal guardianship of my children, wrote up a living will...the whole nine yards. I NEVER want my children or my parents EVER to have to make that decision. I made my legal decisions FOR my family, to save them the heartache of having to do it for me.

I highly recommend a living will ASAP. You never know what is coming around the corner.

PLEASE (sorry to babble on now that I got started), live every moment as fully as you can. Enjoy every smile and every little thing you can. Protect yourself and protect your family...get a living will.

Gayle

P.S. Sorry, this just struck a chord with me. I don't mean to be pushy. I just wanted you to see what could happen if you DON'T have a living will. Thanks for letting me share my experience.
 
As you have read here, a DNR and a living will are 2 different things, in most places.

A DNR is something you decide or your family decides. Usually after your health as been declining for a while. Or if you are in the hopsital with a catastrophic event. For example, you are in the hospital with the flu, and you get septic, then you have a cardiac arrest. During the cardiac arrest, you have horrible brain damage. Then you are in a coma, septic and have mutli-system organ failure. They run tests, such as MRI's and EEG's, and see the pt (I will stop saying you) has no chance of recovering brain function. Then the family may opt to chose a DNR order for this pt. That does not mean they wll immediatley withdraw support. Only that is another cardiac arrest happens, they will let the pt "go."

Now, say this pt recovers from the organ failure but not the brain damage. The pt is then able to be transferred to a nursing home, with a feeding tube,etc. The DNR usually stays in affect so the pt will not suffer thru another attempt at resuscitation.

A Living Will, in most places, is a record of your wishes.If the above pt, with the brain damage and organ failure, has a living will on record with their family,doctor,lawyer,etc., it makes things easier for the pts family. They may elect not to start treatments such as dialysis, feeding tubes, ventilators. If the doctor has done everything necessary to see if there is any chance of a meaningful recovery.

The only times I have seen a Living Will keep a pt from being resuscitated is when an old, and I mean old, pt comes into the ER, usually from a nursing home. The EMS usually brings the pt in, while doing some type of resuscitation efforts. The nursing home finds the Living Will, the pts doctor and family is contacted and the efforts are stopped. Allowing the pt to "go on peace" as they wished.

I hope all my rambaling makes some sense. I am not a lawyer. only a Respiratory Therapist who has worked in a hospital too long (15 yrs) and has seen too many thigns happen. Make you wishes clear. That will in no way stop you from getting any help you need in an emergency situation. Especially a situation that has a "reversible outcome."

:)
 
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