Did you change your name when you got married?
- Thread starter TeTe
- Start date
LauraMax
Cathlete
I did, & I had SUCH A HARD TIME!!!!!! I had to go to the SS office 3 times before it finally stuck. And you want to hear something really funny? By the time my name was officially changed I was divorced. 
I know a guy in my town who hyphenated his name with his wife's. Boy does he take heat for that. From our PD especially.
I know a guy in my town who hyphenated his name with his wife's. Boy does he take heat for that. From our PD especially.
I didn't change mine...bet that's a big shock to everyone!
I knew a guy who changed to his wife's name because his last name sucked.
I have a friend whose mother-in-law refused to "let" her change her name. She had to have the family name. My friend had a great Irish name. Her married name? Smith.
I knew a guy who changed to his wife's name because his last name sucked.
I have a friend whose mother-in-law refused to "let" her change her name. She had to have the family name. My friend had a great Irish name. Her married name? Smith.
alsrnbsn
Cathlete
I actually didn't change my name "professionally" until almost 9 months after the wedding. I changed my name on my driver's license, on my checking account and stuff like that, but with the military, it's just such a hassle to do that, then you have to change all the names on the uniforms and such that it wasn't worth it for the first few months. I can't remember why, but DH had a bit of a fuss about it, then I finally changed it. He understood about the military hassle, though, but he kept calling me by the wrong name (his), and no one knew who he was talking about!
amyg
Cathlete
LOL, is there an "other" category???? :+ :7
I added his name to mine for two years.
I realized how silly it was to have 2 last names without a hyphen that were both 9 letters and equally difficult to pronounce.
I changed my first last name to my second middle name after three years.
I now have two middle names and (his) last name.
OMG the SSA and DMV *hated* me.}(
I added his name to mine for two years.
I realized how silly it was to have 2 last names without a hyphen that were both 9 letters and equally difficult to pronounce.
I changed my first last name to my second middle name after three years.
I now have two middle names and (his) last name.
OMG the SSA and DMV *hated* me.}(
materialsgirl
Cathlete
I did the same thing that Amy eventually did. I took my maiden name and made it into a 2nd middle name, and took his last name.
bayerngirl
Cathlete
Nope, I married my husband (he is in the military!)24 years ago in Denmark instead of in Germany which is where I am from. It was already hard to get married to an American in Germany (paperwork took over a year back then!)Back then you couldn't change your name when you got married in Germany It was unheard of
Belinda
It was unheard of Belinda
"my SIL pulled me aside to tell me that she thought it was "illegal" for a woman not to take her husband-to-be's last name"
delfin,
That's hysterical!
About a month after we were married, my MIL asked me if I had changed my name (she'd "heard" of women who hadn't), making sure to add, "I certainly hope so." I told her no, that I was keeping my maiden name.
She said, "Oh, well, you know that the Bible says you should." (Like this would matter to a couple who had just had the most non-religious wedding possible.)
My husband quickly replied, "Huh? I don't remember a Mr. & Mrs. Moses." I knew then why I married him.
delfin,
That's hysterical!
About a month after we were married, my MIL asked me if I had changed my name (she'd "heard" of women who hadn't), making sure to add, "I certainly hope so." I told her no, that I was keeping my maiden name.
She said, "Oh, well, you know that the Bible says you should." (Like this would matter to a couple who had just had the most non-religious wedding possible.)
My husband quickly replied, "Huh? I don't remember a Mr. & Mrs. Moses." I knew then why I married him.
nancy324
Cathlete
My cousin and his wife combined their last names into a new last name! I thought that was really sweet, and thought about doing it, but by the time we got married, we were both too established in our careers to consider changing our names.
I would never even consider giving up my name!
I would never even consider giving up my name!
andtckrtoo
Cathlete
I still had my ex's last name when I married because of my DD, and because my original last name was pretty non-flattering. But I liked my name then, so when I got married again, I didn't really think much about changing it. DH wanted me to, and I always said I would eventually. We got married in 2000. In 2006 DH planned a trip to Hawaii for us. By this time, I was using both names, but my legal name was still my previous DH's (and the D there is not for Dear - use any expletive you like). Now my current DH swears he did not do this on purpose, but he put the ticket under my married name. We tried to change it, but could not. So, I had to get everything changed over to my married name in order to go to Hawaii (big carrot - eh?). I've had everything changed over for a while now, and cannot believe I didn't do it sooner. It's just so much easier.
Sounds like several people "know a person whose husband changed his name"---yeah, that's right--my DH is one of those :7
I actually can't think of anything we did that WAS traditional, lol.
His last name would have sounded RIDUNKULOUS with my first name so I just planned on keeping my maiden name, but then DH decided that he didn't want one of use to have a different last name than our kids, so he suggested that he change his last name. It sounded better, it solved any future mix-ups, and he kind of hates his family---everyone's a winner! ;-)
Oh, and he was the "last" potential for carrying on that name}( His family was, well, I won't subject the boards to that kind of language
Mattea
I actually can't think of anything we did that WAS traditional, lol.
His last name would have sounded RIDUNKULOUS with my first name so I just planned on keeping my maiden name, but then DH decided that he didn't want one of use to have a different last name than our kids, so he suggested that he change his last name. It sounded better, it solved any future mix-ups, and he kind of hates his family---everyone's a winner! ;-)
Oh, and he was the "last" potential for carrying on that name}( His family was, well, I won't subject the boards to that kind of language
Mattea
maddiesmum
Cathlete
You need another category.
We don't all choose to change our name or keep the maiden name. I chose, and both of my sisters did the same, to add my husband's surname at the end of mine, so Clare McAlister-Raeburn am I. We three sisters were all proud of the McAlister name. Personally, I cannot stand being addressed as "Mrs" anything, and "Mrs. Raeburn" is his mother. No way could I ever associate myself with that name. And no, my kids never had any difficulty spelling their long surname. We are all three totally comfortable with it.
When people send me letters addressed to "Mrs. Stuart Raeburn" I feel like vomitting, because I'm just not there at all.
Marriage should never be an act of self-effacement and to take his name is just what that would have meant to me. Ask yourself why do men get so uppity at the suggestion that perhaps they could take your name upon marriage? Interesting reactions..... bristlings, splutterings, incredulous looks, etc.
Clare
We don't all choose to change our name or keep the maiden name. I chose, and both of my sisters did the same, to add my husband's surname at the end of mine, so Clare McAlister-Raeburn am I. We three sisters were all proud of the McAlister name. Personally, I cannot stand being addressed as "Mrs" anything, and "Mrs. Raeburn" is his mother. No way could I ever associate myself with that name. And no, my kids never had any difficulty spelling their long surname. We are all three totally comfortable with it.
When people send me letters addressed to "Mrs. Stuart Raeburn" I feel like vomitting, because I'm just not there at all.
Marriage should never be an act of self-effacement and to take his name is just what that would have meant to me. Ask yourself why do men get so uppity at the suggestion that perhaps they could take your name upon marriage? Interesting reactions..... bristlings, splutterings, incredulous looks, etc.
Clare
nancy324
Cathlete
"Marriage should never be an act of self-effacement and to take his name is just what that would have meant to me. Ask yourself why do men get so uppity at the suggestion that perhaps they could take your name upon marriage? Interesting reactions..... bristlings, splutterings, incredulous looks, etc."
Well said, Clare. I agree.
Well said, Clare. I agree.
MCunningham
Cathlete
I changed my name after about 10 months of marriage, because I was really torn about it. Eventually, my husband harangued me enough that I did it.
I had a REALLY hard time with it... I sank into this deep depression over losing my maiden name... it sounds kinda silly, but to this day, I miss my family name, and in hindsight, I wish I hadn't done it.
However... it was such a pain to change it, I don't feel like going through that all over again, so I'm stuck with the name. (I'm still married.)
I had a REALLY hard time with it... I sank into this deep depression over losing my maiden name... it sounds kinda silly, but to this day, I miss my family name, and in hindsight, I wish I hadn't done it.
However... it was such a pain to change it, I don't feel like going through that all over again, so I'm stuck with the name. (I'm still married.)