jillybean
Cathlete
As several of you have speculated as to the nature of Cathe’s ‘Free Gift,’ I thought I’d quell the suspense with a list of the 10 most probable freebies:
1.) (1) Travel-size package of tampons, (1) travel-size deodorant, (1) disposable razor and travel-sized can of shaving cream – each in the same brand Cathe herself uses.
2.) A Friedrich family photo along with a personalized note from Cathe promising that she will somehow incorporate the screen names of each person who kept their preorder into the name of her third child.
3.) Autographed copies of her knee x-rays.
4.) A Cathe keychain that utters one of five sayings when you squeeze it:
a. Work!
b. What you do to one side, you do to the other.
c. You get out of it what you put into it!
d. Let’s grab our balls.
e. I’ll leave out the monkey sound effects!
5.) A mini scrapbook containing photos of her kitchen and its contents, replete with detailed handwritten accounts of what she eats - and how, when, where, and why she eats it.
6.) Money.
7.) An actual item from Cathe’s home, such as a coaster, trivet, candle holder, picture frame, piece of ‘gently used’ workout attire, rocks from her landscaping, a potholder, or one of her kid’s favorite toys.
8.) A list of her weight, BMI, cholesterol, and blood pressure during each of her filming sessions.
9.) A Cathe Club Card granting those of you who kept your pre-orders a free lifetime supply of DVDs, along with a handmade greeting card from Cathe, guaranteeing each of us that she will continue to make high intensity, high impact workouts until she literally dies during a filming.
10.)A hand-carved box (Cathe picked up whittling during her rehabilitation) inside of which each pre-orderer shall find a chip. Upon having this chip surgically implanted (an operation SNM plans on paying for), you will have unlimited access to what goes on inside Cathe's brain. No more timely and unnecessary waiting for posts about upcoming workouts, filming updates, and filming schedules – now you’ll know as soon as she does!
1.) (1) Travel-size package of tampons, (1) travel-size deodorant, (1) disposable razor and travel-sized can of shaving cream – each in the same brand Cathe herself uses.
2.) A Friedrich family photo along with a personalized note from Cathe promising that she will somehow incorporate the screen names of each person who kept their preorder into the name of her third child.
3.) Autographed copies of her knee x-rays.
4.) A Cathe keychain that utters one of five sayings when you squeeze it:
a. Work!
b. What you do to one side, you do to the other.
c. You get out of it what you put into it!
d. Let’s grab our balls.
e. I’ll leave out the monkey sound effects!
5.) A mini scrapbook containing photos of her kitchen and its contents, replete with detailed handwritten accounts of what she eats - and how, when, where, and why she eats it.
6.) Money.
7.) An actual item from Cathe’s home, such as a coaster, trivet, candle holder, picture frame, piece of ‘gently used’ workout attire, rocks from her landscaping, a potholder, or one of her kid’s favorite toys.
8.) A list of her weight, BMI, cholesterol, and blood pressure during each of her filming sessions.
9.) A Cathe Club Card granting those of you who kept your pre-orders a free lifetime supply of DVDs, along with a handmade greeting card from Cathe, guaranteeing each of us that she will continue to make high intensity, high impact workouts until she literally dies during a filming.
10.)A hand-carved box (Cathe picked up whittling during her rehabilitation) inside of which each pre-orderer shall find a chip. Upon having this chip surgically implanted (an operation SNM plans on paying for), you will have unlimited access to what goes on inside Cathe's brain. No more timely and unnecessary waiting for posts about upcoming workouts, filming updates, and filming schedules – now you’ll know as soon as she does!
