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When things just aren't going right - what do you do?

Discussion in 'Open Discussion' started by robyn6002, Nov 29, 2005.

  1. robyn6002 Cathlete

    Dec 31, 1999
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    Just curious... this is a somewhat philosophical question...

    When things just arent going right...

    Do you KEEP on trying harder and harder....

    Do you take action to follow another route?

    Do you sit back - and go with the flow?

    I always feel IN CONTROL more when I take action....
    Just curious how you react?

    For instance.... (in my particular case)

    Work is insane... right now... so I decided to take control - update the resume and send it out. Sounds good right? The only problem is this would be my 7th job since 99! So there is a bit of taking too much action!

    I'm friends with a guy - who is just coming out of a marriage. We have a connection but we BOTH know right now is NOT the time - maybe in a year or so. He has major gaping wounds and needs to heal.

    So I'm thinking I focus on OTHER things..
    - Get a makeover - Thanks Nancy for starting that thread
    - Do stuff on the house. I need major work done
    - Get certification for work?

    and of course.. My cathe work outs and continued prayers and focus on my kids.

    Would love to hear from you
  2. buffettgirl Cathlete

    Apr 23, 2005
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    RE: When things just aren't going right - what do you d...

    Robyn, I know what you mean about being in control. When things seen out of control, in addition to crying, praying, and working out, I love to make lists. I love to make lists and cross things off. The lists are rarely for anything more major than chores to be done, but the list seems to help me feel in charge.
  3. Miss Lee Cathlete

    Jun 30, 2005
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    I know just what you mean. I hate that feeling of being stuck in limbo. Like you, I tend to want to make things happen. I like your idea of trying to focus on other things. You will have the satisfaction of accomplishing something at the same time that you are sitting back and allowing your other issues to settle down.

    ETA sometimes when I can divert my attention to something else, it helps to clear my mind and I can see more clearly the answers to my other puzzles.

  4. Boybert Cathlete

    Mar 2, 2005
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    My vice is throw myself hard and heavy into my workouts. If I still have energy I might clean & organize. After that I usually like to settle myself down with a good book and maybe a cup o' java ;)

    "you miss 100% of the shots you never take"

  5. candi Cathlete

    Jun 27, 2003
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    I keep thinking: THIS TOO SHALL PASS. And you know what, it always does.

    I used to try to control more things in my life but found it just added to my stress.
  6. allwildgirl Cathlete

    Jan 3, 2005
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    " love to make lists. I love to make lists and cross things off. The lists are rarely for anything more major than chores to be done, but the list seems to help me feel in charge."

    I knew I loved you for more than just your good looks;) I also make lists and cross things off.

    I work out hard.

    I clean and purge and throw things out.
  7. ldy_solana Cathlete

    Aug 29, 2005
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    i probably do the wrong thing in most situations and try to reign some control over it. either by trying harder or taking a different route. there are some battles where i just let things go with the flow and try to block it out of my mind. i just keep living and do my best to move those obstacles out of my way.


    When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be
    disappointed to discover they are not it -- Bernard Bailey
  8. pink_fortitude Banned

    Jun 24, 2005
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    Wow. Let's see, I think all of the above apply at one point or another.

    There are times that things are completely out of your control, and like Candi said, you will just have to let it run its course because it will pass. I try to learn from circumstances and situations, because NOTHING happens without a reason. I believe that certain things are put before us for our growth in character and as human beings.

    There are also times when you just have to sit back and be still. If life is going to fast and you have too many plates spinning, there is nothing that will help you more than taking a moment of silence to just be, and then evaluate the situation to see what you can do to make it work. Most of the time we add the stress to our own lives ourselves and have noone to blame.

    If things aren't going the way I planned, I try a different way because the direction that I am heading obviously isn't working. It is fun to be creative. :)

    If this is your seventh job in only six years, I would sit and ask myself "why". I have never believed in running away; it solves nothing, it only guarentees that you will carry problems with you. If you can't make it work where you are now, it won't work if you go somewhere else.

    I think that diverting your focus is great. I go for walks in the woods, pray, connect with friends I haven't see in a long time, or call a relative that I haven't heard from to get myself back on even keel. I also love the idea of making a list and crossing things off; it makes you feel like you are accomplishing something. And of course there is working out hard! :p

    I hope that everything works out for you!

  9. hippahips Cathlete

    Aug 30, 2003
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    I try harder.

    If that doesn't work, I take action -- follow one plan after another to see what works. When all of that are exhausted and things are still crappy...

    I curl up and roll with the punches.

    There will always be areas in our lives that are way out of our control. The more you try to control these things, the more you waste your energy. Put your energy into things that really matter TO YOU. For me, that's my son, his welfare, his future. And yeah, my workouts help pull me together.

  10. dlavie Cathlete

    Oct 12, 2004
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    I try to ride things out.

    If you fall into a swift river and try to swim against the current you'll drown. However if you swim with the current but towards shore you'll make it. You may not have total control but I doubt you have no control.

    You have to choose your battles... you can chose the hill you die on.

  11. cathykazbar Cathlete

    Dec 26, 2004
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    I ride things out too ... actually I talk things out ...

    I have to talk things out ..... talk w/DH, call a friend, or if noone's there, I sometimes write in a journal (although I haven't done that too much lately). If I don't, then I've noticed the stress bottles up inside and I get grouchy, upset etc... etc...

    I know that I tend to be a worrier ... worry-er ..?! ... ahem .. anyway ... I tend to worry a lot and talking things out helps me to get my problems into perspective.

    And of course, working out is big..huge.. for me. If it is a realllly bad day, I tend to go for a good round of kickboxing. For some reason, it really seems to help me work out the ol' stress :)!

    Cath :)

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