kathryn
Cathlete
Í've been out of town for a couple of days, to give a workshop in Colorado. The workshop didn't go as well as I would have liked, because 1/3 of the attendees kept coming in late (and it started at 1:45) and this, along with their being unprepared to take any notes, not bringing a poem with them as every single description of the workshop clearly stated, someone suggesting that there should be more work on actual analisis of poems--which is clearly NOT what I intended to do and which was clear in the description of the workshop, and some of them trying to sit waaaay in the back, at tables that I had purposely separated from the others, and various and sundry other little annoying things, made me feel like, as doctors make the worst patients, teachers can make the worst 'students' (I wasn't alone...I talked to other workshop presenters at the "VIP dinner" and they had many of the same complaints). I've never had this much problem with audiences at other presentations (though I know I shouldn't focus on 'bad,' but on the majority of participants who did participate, and the good evaluations (even from those who had comments about wanting more X or Y or whatever). On the positive side, along with the good attendees (which really were in the majority), I met several colleagues, got treated to VIP treatment (including a complimentary robe to use while at the hotel, and a VIP dinner where I ended up sitting between two vegetarians!)
When I got home yesterday, I got back to a sick cat: Mandy, whose chronic renal problems took a very quick turn for the worse. And a month and a day after Scooter died, after seeing the vet this morning, and getting back her test results, I made the decision to have her euthanized (a much harder parting than with Scooter, because I have the guilt of not taking her in earlier, when I knew something wasn't quite right,and of not caring about her as much as Scooter...)
I was hoping that seeing some half-century birthday greetings here or at VF might cheer me up. And they would have, if more than one person had remembered/noticed. Just makes me realize that the illusion of friendships here is just that.
I probably shouldn't even be writing this, and will no doubt regret it later, because I hate when people feel sorry for themselves and pi$$ and moan about how bad they have it, and I know that there are some here who might even find some pleasure in seeing me feel bad--the ones who like to try to get some dig in against me whenever they see an opportunity to (but again, that's not the majority...but I guess I'm in 'glass completely empty' mood for now.)
What more can I say...probably rambled on too much already.
When I got home yesterday, I got back to a sick cat: Mandy, whose chronic renal problems took a very quick turn for the worse. And a month and a day after Scooter died, after seeing the vet this morning, and getting back her test results, I made the decision to have her euthanized (a much harder parting than with Scooter, because I have the guilt of not taking her in earlier, when I knew something wasn't quite right,and of not caring about her as much as Scooter...)
I was hoping that seeing some half-century birthday greetings here or at VF might cheer me up. And they would have, if more than one person had remembered/noticed. Just makes me realize that the illusion of friendships here is just that.
I probably shouldn't even be writing this, and will no doubt regret it later, because I hate when people feel sorry for themselves and pi$$ and moan about how bad they have it, and I know that there are some here who might even find some pleasure in seeing me feel bad--the ones who like to try to get some dig in against me whenever they see an opportunity to (but again, that's not the majority...but I guess I'm in 'glass completely empty' mood for now.)
What more can I say...probably rambled on too much already.
