Withering Away...

[pebblesus]

My boyfriend is skinny as hell. He workouts (he's the one that motivated me to do it myself). He's in amazing shape and probably must have the lowest bodyfat on record!

However, he's too skinny! His stems are like beanstalks! I pick on him for it so he hit the gym and focused hard on legs.

* He has pins and bolts in one of his ankles so he cant bend his foot, so doing a lot of the leg exercises is impossible.
* He doesn't do cardio at the gym, but he's a golfer and walks 18 holes (or more) almost everyday.
* He quit drinking a few months ago and since then, he's having a hard time maintaining his weight and keeps losing more.
* His other problem is that he doesn't like to eat! He won't eat anything fried or even cooked in too much oil or butter. No red meats, very little cheese and no pig.

I tried upping his protein but it's not easy to increase calories in the CLEANEST EATER IN THE WORLD haha.

Anyone have suggestions on how I can help him maintain his weight better-- or even GAIN a few more pounds? Im not sure what to do (wish I had the problem myself lol).. Even a different leg routine considering he has limited exercises he can actually do for legs. He's been having a hardtime bulking up his stems and his attention span at the gym is only about 30-45 mins

Any advice would begreatly appreciated!

 

[Aquajock]

My advice is to put yourself in his position, and ask yourself how you would feel if he picked on you for the shape of your legs, tried to change your diet, tried to mastermind your workout schedule, all in the wake of having pins and bolts in one of your ankles and having recently quit drinking.

A-Jock

 

[pebblesus]

Oh no! You misinterpreted me He's the one that has been complaining to me that he's losing weight. I tell him he needs more fat and protein, but he won't eat anything with too much fat in it. He's not self-conscious I just threw in all those facts about him to state the facts of the situaion, so I could get advice that is appropriate to the situation. That's all. We've been together for 5 years and I don't pick on him in any malicious way (certainly not in any way he doesn't pick on me
I didn't try to change his diet or tell him how to workout.. just tried giving imput when he brought it up. Only I don't know what to tell him I have not the problem. I have enough trouble keeping my weight where it's at and I like to eat.
He tells me what he does to put on mass, maybe it's just not enough? I was just looking for advice on how to put on mass when in the above situation: he doesn't drink anymore (he said that's where he got a good 1200 clories a day), he can't do certain exercises and he doesn't like to eat much
I don't know what else there, but Ive always gotten some great advice in the past on this board so I thought Id bring it up for discussion.

 

[6Swans4me]

Glad to know that I wasn't the only one who misinterpreted what you meant.

My dh is very thin. When we were first married, I tried putting weight on him to no avail. He has an uncle with the same build. I asked his uncle what I could do to help dh bulk up his mass. He told me that he didn't put on mass until he was much older. He's still tall and lanky in his seventies. Now, I accept that he's built differently. I love him so much regardless!!! I am so happy our twin daughters have his build instead of mine!!!

I'm surprised your guy doesn't crave sugar since he gave up drinking. My dh never ate junk food or craved sweets until he cut back drinking. Granted, he doesn't eat a lot of sweets as it is, but at least he eats desserts now.

Whenever your boyfriend mentions wanting to put on weight, just reassure him that you still love him for his mind and soul. I think I would fall over if my dh encouraged me to clean up my diet and add three more cardios a week whenever I complained about my body!!!! :7 Nope, my dh tells me that I'm still sexy to him. And, that's really all that matters.

Wendy

 

[Aquajock]

Apologies for misinterpreting your original post, Pebblesus. Just a couple of thoughts:

I quit drinking myself back in the summer of 1987, and I dropped a tremendous amount of weight (pure lard; I'd estimate about 30-35 pounds) in about two months' time, while eating like a horse and doing nothing more meaningful physically that walking around the lakes. (That oughtta tell ya how much I was drinking, and pigging out during my drunken binges, yes?) And I've heard from many former alcohol drinkers that they had the same experience. Drinking alcohol to excess alters your metabolism, and when one quits drinking, both the metabolism and one's appetite are affected, sometimes unpredictably.

After about 18 months of sobriety, my metabolism started to normalize. (Much to my chagrin; I loved being ultra-skinny without having to work out or watch my food intake.) Thus, I would suggest that your boyfriend's sudden weight loss is more of a long-term temporary thing than a permanent, as is his appetite (or lack of appetite) for certain foods or macronutrients.

With regard to his appetite, if I were in your position I would simply encourage him to keep eating more of those healthier foods (chicken, fish, low-fat dairy and eggs) which he DOES prefer; IMHO it's even harder to add foods in to one's diet than it is to subtract foods out. It's also possible that his body has a certain intelligence about it; those foods he doesn't crave might be NOT what he needs nutritionally right now. Check back in about a year and see how he's doing in the variety of foods area.

With regard to the leg exercises, in all honesty, given his orthopedic issues, I would suggest he get a referral to a sports therapist or physical therapist for appropriate leg strengthening training. It's very, very easy for an amateur to do things really wrong and totally screw up even more joints (knee, pelvis, low back) by not getting proper guidance.

JMHO -

A-Jock

 

[Sunshine 1528]

If he is worried about his weight loss, though AJock mentioned a very good reason, maybe he should get a physical just to be sure there isn't something else causing the weight loss.

Otherwise, yes, I have very thin boys in their early 20's and believe it is just genetic.

Seems he lives a healthy lifestyle, we are what we are . . . but sometimes the guys are just like us women and want to be "perfect" based upon society's vision.

Have a manager at work who asked about our health insurance paying for calf augmentation - had to bite my tongue ! Told him we'd only cover it if it was medically necessary. (Wow - and I thought I had body image problems !)

Hope all goes well for your BF.