What would you do?????

L

lorihart

Cathlete
I have a quick question for everyone,
We (me and DH) were seriuosly chatting about going to Cuba again.He just brought the issue up Friday night.One of my concerns,with it being short notice and all was that one of the other girls at work was thinking about going away.Two of us can't be gone at the sametime.
Here is the catch with her.SHe is waiting for a "wonderful" seat sale to appear.If she can get down there for $600 she is going.It will be short notice,then she will have to get all of her shifts covered at work, which is hard to do on short notice b/c we are already short one girl and some of the other girls have been taking her shifts.I would have to be one of the people who takes her shifts.
(Do you guys understand?)
I had heard her talking about going away but it was going to be a last minute thing. For my trip,I have all areas covered.I have my shifts covered,the money,I have made a trip to the travel agency.But I didn't want to feel like I was stabing her in the back.She doesn't even know when and if she is going.
Last night I called her and she told me that she will find some details out tomorrow.I personally think I am being to nice.This is one of those situations where nice isn't going to get you anywhere.If the rolls were reversed here,I would have been nice enough to tell her to go,you know,nothing is written in stone so why should I full up someones trip just b/c I "MIGHT" be going somewhere.
Whats gonna happen is that I am not gonna go anywhere and she isn;t go'in anywere.Her DH just got fired so I don't know how she can afford to go anywhere.
One of the girls told me to go book my trip and don't worry about it.
What do you guys think? She is finding out more today, and if she doesn't know anything else or the info isn't good enough I am booking it tomorrow. I am half tempted to book it today.I can't beleive I let her have full dibs on something that may never be.
Thanks,
Lori:)
 
Lori:

go right ahead and book your vacation without a second thought.
You are friends but that does not mean you have to be tied at the hip. You don't have to arrange your life around hers to make sure you don't upset her. She needs to make her own plans and you yours. Sounds as if she won't be going anywhere for awhile from what you say. Why should you not go just because she isn't? Friends who are real friends also understand eachother and let eachother breathe. They also rejoice in the other's good fortune. So if she's a true friend, she'll understand you can't wait around for her forever and will be happy to receive a postcard from you.

I am so jealous you are going to Cuba. Cuba is the source of all my studies and I still haven't gotten there yet!

Enjoy and send ME a postcard!!!

Clare
 
I'm not clear on the timing here. Why can't you just pick another week for your vacation instead of the week she picked? Do you need to go right away? What I'm getting it is if she reported that there was a certain time period that she wanted to be away, and she got there first, you should pick a different time to be away. Am I missing something?

We have the same thing in my office, but whoever "calls" a time period first gets it. I can occasionally plan vacation days with little notice, if only if no one else is going away. It's just a reality of office life.
 
Lori, I was about to post when I saw Nancy's post, and she and I are on the same wavelength entirely (as often happens, Miss Nancy :)).

If we're reading your post correctly and your colleague "called" the week first, I think Nancy's right. In all my years in the office world, things always worked this way: seniority rules (as in, the more senior people got to "pick a week" first), and among people of the same seniority level, it was first come first served. Somebody's got to mind the store, you know? ;-)

I also agree with Nancy that there's a little fairplay issue here. If your colleague has already talked about going away during the week you've targeted, whether or not she's firmed up her plans, then in my view courtesy and fairness would dictate that you tell her what you and DH are thinking of doing and give her the opportunity to either say "Sure, go ahead" or "Oh no, I'm going away that week."

My two cents' worth for the day. :)

http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0903/sport/sport-smiley-003.gif Kathy S. http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0903/spezial/spudniks/spudniklifter.gif
 
She didn't really "call" the week first.She mentioned that she might be going. She doesn't know when she is going.She is pretty much "calling" the whole month of May with a "maybe". She wants to go down south anytime between the 2nd week on....and she isn't going to go unless she gets a really good deal and then she as to ask for the time off,then get her shifts covered.She won't know if she is going until 2-3 days before the flight leaves.
We may not have the same week in mind...like I said, I spoke to her last night and she doesn't know what she is doing.So what about if she decides she isn't going and then it is to late for me to go? Speaking of fairness I think she needs to make up her mind so that other people can make plans.
I have no problem with her going, if she is going.I just want her to make up her mind weather she is going or not.
This is the only week I can go b/c two of the other girls are going to be gone for work off and on (not at the sametime)and then the same girl I am talking about is going to be gone the last two weekends in May. Looks like she won;t be there much the month of may.
I guess our office is a little different.If I hadn't worked with her last Tuesday I wouldn't have known anything about it.I would have called my boss and asked him if anyone had time off that week, he would have said no, b/c she hasn't asked for anytime off and then I would have booked my trip.
She won't say sure go ahead...b/c she MAY be going....and she isn't going to say I am going away b/c she doesn't have a clue when she is going.
Maybe you will still think that she has first dibs..I think she does to to a certain extent but I just want a answer, yes or no..is that to much to ask?
Lori
 
And of course I have something else to add:) So, if she "calls" that week, fools me up, and then she may "call" another week in June and fool someone else up.What about if she keeps "calling" weeks, is that fair?
 
Lori:

I am sorry, I read your post really quickly and early and after very little sleep and did not pick up on the office politics of the situation. I agreed with Kathy on her first post and I agree with both you and Kathy here. I think you have been more than fair. It is unfair of any office worker to keep everyonbe suspended not knowing whether she has booked a certain week or not, whether they can go ahead and book the week they want or not. At this point I would say, she's had her chance, speak to your boss and sort things out for yourself. I actually think it is the boss' responsibility to tell this other woman that she needs to make her mind up and chase her up on it. You certainly shouldn't be expected to keep shuffling your holiday plans around her indecisiveness.

Clare
 
Thanks Girls,
I spoke to my boss earlier and he pretty much said that it was up to me, she hadn't asked for anytime off. I don't think he wanted to take sides but when I said that I was going to book something by tomorrow he agreed with me.
I haven't been talking to her yet today b/c she is gone away.If I don't talk to her today,I have to work with her in the morning.And I am basically going to say,"Im sorry jody, I can;t wait for you to make up your mind" She may not like it (b/c shes like that) but she will get over it.
Lori
 
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