RE: Question To Kim:
I honestly don't know the dose of prozac I was taking, but when they uppped the dose, they just doubled the pills. They made me totally emotionless. I was a zombie. Same thing with Wellbutrin.
If antidepressants make you feel better, please use them, regardless of a small weight gain. Being alive and 5 pounds heavier than you would like to be is a much better scenario than skinny but dead -- after nearly killing myself, this hits home to me.
How did I get better without drugs -- first I'll have to say that faith in God helps more than anything. I've been pastor's wife for 18 years and a pastor's daughter all my life. But I never really worked on my RELATIONSHIP with God, I was always focused more on activities; planning church fellowships, church secretarial work, cooking for pot-lucks, cleaning the church, practicing playing the hymns we would be singing next week, etc. I've kept my prayer life and study time very disciplined and put those ahead of the "tasks"--immense difference.
Then, exercise, exercise, exercise. Because it is January and I'm a trainer, this is easy. The gym is full of people needing assistance. It is no problem for me to exercise 5 hours a day right now. But they are not all very intense. I have maybe 1-2 hours of intense exercising, and the rest I would call "movement" rather than exercise -- light walking on the treadmill, teaching beginner classes (where I don't sweat). You get the picture, I'm sure. But home activities like sweeping and vaccuuming would fall into the same category.
I also find that the tanning bed helps me. But then you have to decide if you want the risk of skin cancer. There is disorder called something like "seasonal light disorder" that folks get especially in winter when they don't get enough daylight. They fix this by having you sit in front of a really strong light for about 1/2 hour every day. The tanning bed is how I've chosen to handle this, plus I look like I've been on vacation.
I force myself to get up at the same time 7 days a week and go to bed the same time every day. I force myself to move my body. The busier I keep my body, the happier my brain is.
My husband and I had this conversation last night, in fact. I don't care that my body is sore and tired right now. My mind is great for the first time in 3-4 years. I would prefer the good mind and the tired body any day.
Please feel free to email me if I didn't answer all your questions.
Kim