DS will be 3 next month and he is a picky eater. His meal of choice is either chicken nuggets or hot dogs and french fries or macaroni & cheese. He does like fruit, but hates all vegetables even if covered with cheese. How do you get your kids to try different foods? He refuses to try anything else I make. Any suggestions to try to get some nutritious stuff in him? It makes it hard for me to eat well when I have to make him a separate meal that is less nutritious but is a temptation to me & DH. TIA!
Kids Who are Picky Eaters
- Thread starter kristi
- Start date
dss62467
Cathlete
I've tried every "expert" opinion on this and I can't get my dd to eat. It irritates me to no end! She'll eat PB&J on whole wheat, scrambled eggs and fish sticks. Sometimes she'll eat Tyson chicken breast tenders. Sometimes grilled cheese. She's starting to eat hamburgers too. I don't even bother trying to get her to eat what we're having for dinner. I know that's a bad habit, but I hate the stress of making her eat. It never works and then she just goes hungry.
What really irks me is that she eats well at preschool. Well, I'm glad she eats well there, or else she'd probably be malnourished. But I just wish she'd eat well at home. It's not like I'm THAT bad of a cook!
What really irks me is that she eats well at preschool. Well, I'm glad she eats well there, or else she'd probably be malnourished. But I just wish she'd eat well at home. It's not like I'm THAT bad of a cook!
materialsgirl
Cathlete
Ok, I don't have kids. So you don't have to listen to anything I say, because I'm not speaking from experience. 
However, I have seen this dilemma on tv shows over and over again (20/20, Oprah, you name it), and here is what the solution always is:
Stop making him separate special meals. He only begs for that junk food because he knows you will make it special for him. Tell him he has to eat what everyone else is eating, or he can go hungry. It will not hurt him to go without dinner for a night (or two). Sure, he'll be whiny and angry at you. But he will eventually get the point that you mean business and become hungry enough that he will eat what you serve. The "experts" say, you should never give in to your child's begging for a special meal that is different from everyone else's. All it does is encourage him to eat the junk.
Like I said, I don't have kids, I don't know if this works. But when they do it on tv talk shows, it does work. (Like that means anything!)
However, I have seen this dilemma on tv shows over and over again (20/20, Oprah, you name it), and here is what the solution always is:Stop making him separate special meals. He only begs for that junk food because he knows you will make it special for him. Tell him he has to eat what everyone else is eating, or he can go hungry. It will not hurt him to go without dinner for a night (or two). Sure, he'll be whiny and angry at you. But he will eventually get the point that you mean business and become hungry enough that he will eat what you serve. The "experts" say, you should never give in to your child's begging for a special meal that is different from everyone else's. All it does is encourage him to eat the junk.
Like I said, I don't have kids, I don't know if this works. But when they do it on tv talk shows, it does work.
(Like that means anything!)toastythemosty
Cathlete
My son is 14 and doesn't like to eat salads so I have to make him sit there and eat it anyways until most of it is gone. My son loves the same foods you mentioned, and I tried switching over to breaded fish instead of nuggets. Seems to work as he likes those too. I don't make macaroni and cheese so they don't get to eat that anymore. Sometimes they just have to learn to eat what we eat at the table or they go hungry.
Charlotte~~
Charlotte~~
It is reassuring to know that I am not the only one going through this. DS eats well at daycare too! I think I will try to only make one meal and tell him he needs to eat it or go hungry. Boy that sounds harsh. Maybe he will at least begin to eat a little bit of the other food. I think that is what my parents did and there were 4 of us kids and we never had any special meals. Also, no after dinner treats until he eats at least a few bits of his food. The only after meal snack will be a piece of fruit or something like that, but no cookies. I hope this approach works. Sometimes it is hard being a parent. I keep hearing in my head "Who is the parent and who is the child?" when DS trys to get his way all the time.
I wouldn't say, eat it or go hungry. I read a great book, called " Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense", by Ellyn Satter. My 2 boys, ages 2 and 4 are not picky. They love veggies, tomatoes, fruit, etc.
The author does suggest that you eat together as a family most of the time for dinner. Make your regular meal, not a special one each night. Serve your dinner family style, and bring the dishes to the table so they can help themselves. Say you are having chicken breasts, green beans, and red potatoes, salad, and bread. The author says most kids will eat bread, so they won't go hungry. Always offer something the entire family enjoys. You can even put a bowl of fresh fruit on the table. The author often does this, even if it's a bowl of canned peaches. So for a couple of weeks, they may only eat fruit, bread, and chicken, but if you repeatedly put veggies on the table every night, eventually they will try them and like them. I always put veggies on my kids plates, whether they eat them that night, or just have a couple bites does not bother me. I never force, I never talk about it.
I never fed my kids the "baby" way. I rarely make nuggets or mac and cheese. My kids eat their sandwiches and hamburgers with lettuce and tomato. They eat whatever I make, and generally are not picky. I am not saying they are perfect eaters. I just wanted to start them out right nutritionally, and not have eating problems like I have.
The book is great and has an entire section devoted to preschoolers.
Lori
The author does suggest that you eat together as a family most of the time for dinner. Make your regular meal, not a special one each night. Serve your dinner family style, and bring the dishes to the table so they can help themselves. Say you are having chicken breasts, green beans, and red potatoes, salad, and bread. The author says most kids will eat bread, so they won't go hungry. Always offer something the entire family enjoys. You can even put a bowl of fresh fruit on the table. The author often does this, even if it's a bowl of canned peaches. So for a couple of weeks, they may only eat fruit, bread, and chicken, but if you repeatedly put veggies on the table every night, eventually they will try them and like them. I always put veggies on my kids plates, whether they eat them that night, or just have a couple bites does not bother me. I never force, I never talk about it.
I never fed my kids the "baby" way. I rarely make nuggets or mac and cheese. My kids eat their sandwiches and hamburgers with lettuce and tomato. They eat whatever I make, and generally are not picky. I am not saying they are perfect eaters. I just wanted to start them out right nutritionally, and not have eating problems like I have.
The book is great and has an entire section devoted to preschoolers.
Lori
Thank you Lori! I'll check the book out. It sounds really great and I like the ideas you suggested. It is definitely worth a try and hopefully will help him at least start to eat the way we do. I've never liked the phrase, "eat it or go hungry" and I would rather not use that method myself. My parents used to say that.
kathryn
Cathlete
Can you try some healthier substitutions: baked fries (cut them up, spray with olive oil spray, and bake in a pre-heated 400 degree oven), veggie burgers on whole grain buns (probably not the all-whole-grain ones for now, but as healthy as you can find that will still be acceptable to the kids, probably not "brown" ones! I hated dark bread when I was a kid. Now I can't stand the white stuff); soy or turkey hot dogs; home made mac and cheese with healthier noodles and cheese, etc.
Can you sometimes try to put some veggies in with the mac and cheese?
Can you sometimes try to put some veggies in with the mac and cheese?
My son is very picky too - always has been. He likes the wierdest things, like feta cheese, and some junk food, but not too bad. He just has a very limited diet. He'll only eat bananas and apple sauce for fruit (and oj, if you count that) and corn and spinach (of all things!) for veggies. When he was very young he would literally gag and vomit on things he really didn't like, so we never forced the issue with him. But now that he's older, we have a "no thank you" bite rule. If there's a new food for dinner, or something he hasn't tried in a while, we insist he try just one bite. He can then refuse to eat any more (which he usually does) But he has found some things "okay" and I think he's more open to more food options now. Maybe it'll work for your son, too. It helped me to understand that this is one issue I cannot control. Good luck!
Kerrie
Kerrie
Kristi, I see that you are pregnant with baby number 2. Congratulations! I think you are really going to like this book. She talks about infant feeding, what to do and not to do when introducing food. It's a wealth of great information. Very down to earth, and very common sense. I wanted to start my boys off right, and this book helped me in so many ways.
Lori
Lori
Thanks Lori! I'm definitely trying to learn as I go along by trying new recipes, finding healthier alternatives, etc. Overweight issues run on both sides of our family, luckily I'm not. I want to give DS a good nutrition base to hopefully not have to deal with this issue. So far the hardest part has been trying to find easy-to-make variations of foods that we already love so I don't have to omit them and in turn make DH & DS feel deprived.
Kathryn, for a while now I have been using turkey alternatives such as turkey hotdogs and kielbasa and very lean cuts of meats. I'll give homemade fries a shot. I already make seasoned cut-up potatoes with no salt seasoning for grilling so these should not be hard to do at all. Thanks for the suggestion! Right now if I make fries for dinner they come from a bag but I always bake them, but I know the fries are processed. Unfortunately, I have not had any success so far in adding veggies to mac & cheese and to "fried" rice (not really fried), but DS always picks them out and says "What's that? Yucky!"
Thanks everyone for such wonderful advice! I just finished my 2-week menu and added a fruit to every meal and made sure there was some kind of bread, even though DH and I won't be eating it. At least DS will hopefully learn that he needs to eat what is on the table. We shall see how it goes.
Kathryn, for a while now I have been using turkey alternatives such as turkey hotdogs and kielbasa and very lean cuts of meats. I'll give homemade fries a shot. I already make seasoned cut-up potatoes with no salt seasoning for grilling so these should not be hard to do at all. Thanks for the suggestion! Right now if I make fries for dinner they come from a bag but I always bake them, but I know the fries are processed. Unfortunately, I have not had any success so far in adding veggies to mac & cheese and to "fried" rice (not really fried), but DS always picks them out and says "What's that? Yucky!"
Thanks everyone for such wonderful advice! I just finished my 2-week menu and added a fruit to every meal and made sure there was some kind of bread, even though DH and I won't be eating it. At least DS will hopefully learn that he needs to eat what is on the table. We shall see how it goes.
momsenergy
Cathlete
Hi, I have a few suggestions. I have two boys, 4 and 5 years old. They too have gone through picky eater stages and these are a few things I have done to help them. When I am concerned that they are not getting the nutrients they need I make a "Milk Shake" that I feed them with a sippy cup (that has a stopper) in their sleep at about 5 or 6:00 in the morning. In the blender I mix about 1 cup of Whole Milk, 1 banana (some times I add a piece of mango too), a spoonful of peanut butter, and a spoonful of sugar (sugar is optional). I'll puree that in the blender until smooth then pass it through a strainer or sieve and fill their cups. They usually gulp in down in their sleep. I've also noticed that on the mornings that they have a "Milk Shake" they usually have a better appetite during the day. I also give them the option to select the color of "Sprinkles" that they want on their oatmeal or cream of wheat or even yogurt. I'll go and get a variety of sprinkles at the store. Another thing that helps them to eat their pancakes or french toast is that I offer whipped cream on them or cut the pancakes or french toast into shapes with cookie cutters. At one time my son was crazy for trains and I cut his into a train shape with small dot circles for the smoke coming from top of the train. He ate the smoke dots first. For french toast: beat 2 eggs in a wide bowl and place a slice of Wonder Bread (Has more vitamins) into the bowl and let it soak in the egg. Then turn it over and let the other side soak. Place a little oil in a small non-stick skillet and heat on low to medium heat. Cook slowly until cooked through. (the french toast will inflate a little) then you know it is cooking through. Place a few slices of butter on top and syrup and then cut into squares or use a cookie cutter for shapes. Another tip, if you like to give them chicken nuggets make them from scratch. Here's a Great recipe but I cut this recipe in half because the whole make a lot of strips.
6 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cut into 1/2 inch strips
1 egg, beaten
1 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup seasoned bread crumbs
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 quart oil for frying
DIRECTIONS:
Place chicken strips into a large, resealable plastic bag. In a small bowl, mix the egg, buttermilk and garlic powder. Pour mixture into bag with chicken. Seal, and refrigerate 2 to 4 hours.
In another large, resealable plastic bag, mix together the flour, bread crumbs, salt and baking powder. Remove chicken from refrigerator, and drain, discarding buttermilk mixture. Place chicken in flour mixture bag. Seal, and shake to coat.
Heat oil in a large, heavy skillet to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
Carefully place coated chicken in hot oil. Fry until golden brown and juices run clear. Drain on paper towels.
I've been through this before and know it can be very frustrating but if you keep trying soon you will see results...use your imagination and get creative. You'll come up with tons of ideas.
Good Luck
Yolanda
6 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cut into 1/2 inch strips
1 egg, beaten
1 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 cup seasoned bread crumbs
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 quart oil for frying
DIRECTIONS:
Place chicken strips into a large, resealable plastic bag. In a small bowl, mix the egg, buttermilk and garlic powder. Pour mixture into bag with chicken. Seal, and refrigerate 2 to 4 hours.
In another large, resealable plastic bag, mix together the flour, bread crumbs, salt and baking powder. Remove chicken from refrigerator, and drain, discarding buttermilk mixture. Place chicken in flour mixture bag. Seal, and shake to coat.
Heat oil in a large, heavy skillet to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
Carefully place coated chicken in hot oil. Fry until golden brown and juices run clear. Drain on paper towels.
I've been through this before and know it can be very frustrating but if you keep trying soon you will see results...use your imagination and get creative. You'll come up with tons of ideas.
Good Luck
Yolanda
I've created a couple of monsters by giving them choices rather than making them eat what DH and I have for dinner at night. It's my own damn fault! I have to admit that they do love fruits and veggies, whole wheat breads, cheese, peanuts and peanut butter. Their diets aren't bad, but they won't eat meat unless it's in the nugget form, or bacon or meatballs.
Because they lack some protein in their diet (they won't eat eggs either) I fortify some of their favorite foods, like pancakes and waffles, with extra eggs and wheat germ. If I make a pizza I put extra olive oil on it. The pediatrician told me to give my kids high calorie foods with healthy fats because they're underweight and extremely active. I also give them whole milk because they don't eat much animal fat.
Because they lack some protein in their diet (they won't eat eggs either) I fortify some of their favorite foods, like pancakes and waffles, with extra eggs and wheat germ. If I make a pizza I put extra olive oil on it. The pediatrician told me to give my kids high calorie foods with healthy fats because they're underweight and extremely active. I also give them whole milk because they don't eat much animal fat.
Dani53
Cathlete
I must be absolutely evil as a mom, but this is a pet peeve of mine. Maybe we should start a "pet peeve" thread....
Anyway, I have zero tolorance for picky eaters. My feeling is that if you are hungry you will eat what is offered. I don't feed them cow tongue, or whatever that intestine stuff is called (tripe?), I feed them good healthy food. If they didn't like it, I nicely and lovingly told them it was too bad, and that this was was we were eating. If they decided not to eat, then it was wrapped up in the refridgerator and they were given the same plate later. This goes on until the food is gone, and they learn most food is better warm when originally served. No desert/snacks goes without saying during this time. The only food offered is the food rejected until it is gone. They will get hungry and eat it, they will not starve. It is just a battle of the wills.
Eventually, they will get it. My kids all went through minor testing stages at about 2-3 years old. When they got a little older, every once in a while they would try to copy a friend, and say they didn't like something. I warned them that if they said that sort of thing again, that they would eat nothing else BUT whatever that was until they either liked it or could politely eat it without comment. Tomatoes was the one thing with my daughter. She was served a beautiful tomato salad for dinner, with nothing else. She never said she didn't like them again
Now she absolutely LOVES them and laughs when she thinks of not ever liking them.
I now have teenagers who will eat anything offered, by anyone. I never have to worry about them going to someone elses house and turning up their noses at any food being served. They are polite, and will be greatful guests. I can't think of one thing my kids won't eat, and they will try anything, so it is worth it to put your foot down a little bit at this age.
Anyway, I have zero tolorance for picky eaters. My feeling is that if you are hungry you will eat what is offered. I don't feed them cow tongue, or whatever that intestine stuff is called (tripe?), I feed them good healthy food. If they didn't like it, I nicely and lovingly told them it was too bad, and that this was was we were eating. If they decided not to eat, then it was wrapped up in the refridgerator and they were given the same plate later. This goes on until the food is gone, and they learn most food is better warm when originally served. No desert/snacks goes without saying during this time. The only food offered is the food rejected until it is gone. They will get hungry and eat it, they will not starve. It is just a battle of the wills.
Eventually, they will get it. My kids all went through minor testing stages at about 2-3 years old. When they got a little older, every once in a while they would try to copy a friend, and say they didn't like something. I warned them that if they said that sort of thing again, that they would eat nothing else BUT whatever that was until they either liked it or could politely eat it without comment. Tomatoes was the one thing with my daughter. She was served a beautiful tomato salad for dinner, with nothing else. She never said she didn't like them again
Now she absolutely LOVES them and laughs when she thinks of not ever liking them.I now have teenagers who will eat anything offered, by anyone. I never have to worry about them going to someone elses house and turning up their noses at any food being served. They are polite, and will be greatful guests. I can't think of one thing my kids won't eat, and they will try anything, so it is worth it to put your foot down a little bit at this age.
dananmis22
Cathlete
I NEVER make my kids a seperate meal, EVER. They eat what is put in front of them period. We do compromise, though. We take turns eating what we do like during the week (cabbage and corned beef one night and lasanga the next) so that we all get what we like at least once a week. We even did that when they were younger. When they were 2 and 3, I would make salmon and spinach one night, and then mac and cheese with sliced apples the next. But once dinner is on the table, that is it.
We teach our kids in our home what we want them to be at others. It would be rude and we would be mortified if my kids were complaining about the food while they were a guest at someone else's house. Manners are so important to us.
And really when you think about it, if we made a separate meal for each one of our kids, it would teach them to have unreasonable and unrealistic expectations on us and others they have relationships with in life. Life isn't going to go out of it's way just to make you happy if you don't like something. I know that you may think that it is just food, but it isn't for us. It is mealtime, when the family gets together and spends time together in harmony and talks as one unit for the first and sometimes only time during the day. Some of the most important things our children learn are at the table.
Missy
We teach our kids in our home what we want them to be at others. It would be rude and we would be mortified if my kids were complaining about the food while they were a guest at someone else's house. Manners are so important to us.
And really when you think about it, if we made a separate meal for each one of our kids, it would teach them to have unreasonable and unrealistic expectations on us and others they have relationships with in life. Life isn't going to go out of it's way just to make you happy if you don't like something. I know that you may think that it is just food, but it isn't for us. It is mealtime, when the family gets together and spends time together in harmony and talks as one unit for the first and sometimes only time during the day. Some of the most important things our children learn are at the table.
Missy