Jessica Simpson Moment! UGH!!

[endorphin_junkie]

You Guys are AWESOME!!:7 I feel much better now thanks!!! It's so freeing to be able to laugh at ourselves. Great stories everyone, thanks for sharing

Michele, thanks I hope my date thought so too;-)

Take Care
Laurie

 

[Poochy]

ROTF ..

I have ssoooooo many ..

after a long fishing trip and scuba diving .. we went out to eat .. yes I actually went into the mens bathroom .. noticed nothing .. went into the stall and looked down to see feet facing the opposite direction as mine .. I could not bleive I did that .. I went out the door in tears from laughing ... the entire group of friends saw me .. watched me enter and was rolling when I emerged in horror and laughter ...

.. my first date w/my now hubby .. I had just lost sight in my right eye .. and was "getting used to" no depth perception .. in that one night .. I knocked over my tea into his lap .. dropped pizza onto my lap .. and on the kiss goodnight went to sweep the hair from his forehead and poked him in the eye!!

Bless his heart .. and he actually still wanted to go out with me .. and now happily married .. w/a few bruises along the way .. LOL

 

[andtckrtoo]

Laurie - I have one...

I was 16 and out on a date with a guy a friend of mine set me up with. I was really trying to impress him. He took me back to his place and wanted to show me something in the basement. So he told me to stand "right where you are" as it was pitch black. He seemed to need more room, so I took a step to the left and CRASH! BAM!! BOOM!! Ended up falling down the entire flight of stairs - took out the banister while I was at it, too! I had nasty nasty bruises pretty much all over (yeah, pretty typical of me with my current bruises from single legged wall squats - eh?). He did end up dating me again - why I don't know - but he did. It ended which was just as good as his last name was Schmuck and he was well named. But now when someone tells me to stand "right where you are" I do NOT move.

 

[Muffin Top]

I used to always burn my popcorn at work--for about 3 straight years. Then one day I noticed the "popcorn" preset on the microwave.
I have also run my car out of gas a few times....even though there's nothing wrong with my gas gauge.
DH had one once. I was talking about African History class and how we were studying Egypt. He said, "Why Egypt? That's not in Africa...it's in the middle East."
*snort*
We still laugh at that one.

 

[pasqua8]

I have so many and so does DH. Here are 2 of my favorites.
We went to a woodcarving show. Sitting behind one of the tables with a sign on it that said "Lefty" was a nice gentleman with his left arm in a sling. I smiled and said "Did you hurt your hand carving?" He smiled and said "No, I had a brain tumor." I then noticed the huge indentation in his head as my DH and sons were walking away pretending not to know me. The nice man was laughing at me too.

We were building our house and DH was told to go to the gas company and ask for a guy named Jim. He went in and told the lady behind the counter that he needed to talk to Jim about putting in our gas line. She looked at him and said, "Sir, this is the electric company, the gas company is down the street."

And people wonder how we found each other!!

If your date has a sense of humor, you will be seeing him again, if not find someone else to laugh with!

 

[dlandkk808]

I couldn't remember off the top of my head, but reading through these and LMAO, one of them reminded me of something I did once.

It was my usual daily routine, took the kids to school, grabbed something to eat, and went off to work. The whole time I was walking my kids to their class, waiting in line for my food, I kept feeling a little weird and off, but couldn't figure out why. My lower back started to ache a little and I brushed it off as sleeping funny. I was in the middle of my workday when for whatever reason, I looked down at my feet and realized I had two different sandals on! And not only that, they were heeled sandals with different heights (only like an inch different so not major)! Now it all dawned on me why my back ached and I kept feeling "weird." To make things worst, I couldn't leave the office being that I had prior obligations. The only extra pair of footwear I had were my workout shoes so I spent the rest of the day explaining to whoever noticed, why I was wearing athletic shoes to work.

Lisa

 

[SuriTkd]

i just got home from a very long and sad day. one of my clients passed away thursday and today was the funeral. i have gotten very close to the family, so this one hit hard. this stuff is just what i needed. i havent laughed this much in a long time!

i am right in line with you guys. my friends call up and say,
"i did a suri today..." (this could be trying to get into the wrong car, walking into the wrong room, banging into things, dropping things, etc.) once i went to hang up a pair of pants. my mom asked me a question and i turned to her to answer. of course, since i cant multitask, i ended up in the closet.

ever walk around the house looking for your cell phone, and you not only have it in your hand, but you are talking on it?

thank you guys so much for the laughs! laurie, i cant thank you enough for bringing this topic up.

i am so glad i joined the site.

suri

 

[EricaH]

Suri - I'm sorry about your client.

I'm always looking around for my sunglasses when they're propped up on my head. I've done this a million times and never learn.

I'm very gullible and my DH, kids and in-laws love to take advantage of that. Once, I was called for jury duty and needed to write a letter explaining why I couldn't serve (I was in my 3rd trimester). I asked my DH what the judge's name was and he told me "Judge Fudge". I thought that was a weird name, but assumed it was true and wrote the letter and addressed it to Judge Fudge. My DH and kids think that's the funniest thing ever - I'll never live it down.

Erica

 

[four_boy_mom]

These are great!

Okay-- I'm 16 years old and had been dating this guy in my class I really like for 3 months. We decide one day that we are going to make dinner for his whole family (his four sisters and Mom and Dad). I'm Italian and made this great homemade pasta and gravy (red sauce). So in the middle of this big family dinner I have a huge mouthful of pasta. I tried to wash it down with a glass of milk when his little sister cracks a joke. I tried not to laugh. This forced the big mess in my mouth to try to come out my nose. I stopped that from happening only to have the whole thing start to slide down my throat with a bunch of air I sucked in from my nose. Now everyone is looking at me because I've started choking. At that moment I threw up onto my plate. The room is dead silent and everyone is staring at me. His Mom is a nurse. So she runs up behind me and starts doing the Heimlich manuver. After a few attempts to dislodge what I already puked out she starts grabbing everyones half eaten dinner plates announcing that it was now time for desert. If you could die from embarassment that would have been the moment for me.

How many people can say they threw up at the dinner table in front of their boyfriends whole family. The dinner I made!

We continued to date and got married after collage. Fifteen years and 4 kids later we still just crack up about it.

 

[ashleyann]

On my first date with my now husband (it was on Valentine's Day 3 years ago:7 )we went to dinner and afterwards we went to a married couple's house to play one of those movie or music Trivia games. Anyways, I had gone to the bathroom and was making my way to the den where everyone was (2 couples and my date) and my date (now husband) was introducing me to the other couple as I was walking down the three steps to the den. They were all looking at me as I stepped down when my ankle fell over and I nearly fell (but didn't thank God). So they all saw me trip over my own two feet and nearly fall. I was mortified. They all played it cool like nothing happened but they probably had a hay day after we left. My husband has made a few jokes about it but it really is typical for me! I hope this makes you feel better. Yours really wasn't that bad at all!

Ashley

 

[BakerGirl]

That's so funny. I did a very similar thing. My SO took me to a fancy restaurant to meet his family for the first time. He convinced me that I was supposed to place my order by that number. So when the waiter asked for my order, I of course order #22. I have never been so embarrased.

Kathy

 

[moni_stout]

I have a funny one - although it wasn't me, it was my husband.

We were at an outdoor farmers market that was pretty crowded. We were standing in a long line to get some fresh lemonade. I am much shorter than my husband and was standing next to him. He obviously wasn't paying close attention and started affectionately rubbing and stroking the short woman's hair in front of us in line. I was so shocked I just stood there and watched him do it. She turned around screaming! It was hilarious -- I never let him forget it!

Monica