[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON May-12-02 AT 10:32AM (Est)[/font][p]Ok, I promise this is my last post on this topic. I feel the need to explain my previous post....
Trevor, you were not the only one to say "lol" about this subject. Women said it, too. And women actually felt she should take his obnoxious comments as a compliment. So, if you feel you need to say something, don't hold back. You should re-read the entire paragraph addressed specifically to you. The only part that says I was aiming anything at you was the part where I said I couldn't believe you told Jilly to get a thicker skin. The rest of that paragraph I agreed completely with what you had to say. Women dressing for work in a way you describe is completely out of place & absolutely about trying to draw attention & comments. I wear thong panties (see I'm not as uptight as you probably thought), have my belly button pierced & feel like I could flaunt the hell out of my body (thanks to Cathe!). But the WORKPLACE IS NOT THE PLACE TO DO IT! How can we, as women, expect to be treated with respect if we don't deserve it? In the the gym, however,I say go for it. Dress however you want. We're there to make ourselves feel & look good, right? If it makes a girl feel good to show off her panties, go right ahead. I'm sorry if I offended you. That is not what I was trying to do.
This is a huge soap box issue to me because it is very personal to me. Sexual harassment should be addressed immediately when it occurs because sometimes it only gets worse.
It isn't just about dress or speaking to a person in an inappropriate manner. It can also be about touch (touching others or touching yourself!). I had a director that was constantly rubbing (not just adjusting but actually stroking) his zipper in front of me. A few of us girls laughed about this disgusting gesture. Did he think we were turned on by this? Does he do it at home for his wife? Ha ha ha. It really wasn't funny. After several months of my putting up with this behavior, he decided that it was ok that he put his arm around me & tell me he thought I was very sexy. I blew that off, too. A few days later, he came up behind me, pressed himself into me & put his chin on my shoulder. That was it, I finally felt so violated & demeaned that I couldn't let this continue. I had finally had enough to tell this pig that his behavior was inappropriate. I did it in the privacy of his office. I told him that I felt uncomfortable with his touch, I needed him to stay out of my "personal space." I told him that I was telling him out of respect for him (yeah, right). I told him that if it happened again that I would have to report him to our VP. He was very angry with me & I feared retaliation. So I reported the incident & my putting this pig on notice to another director. He stopped touching me & stayed WAY clear of me, but I saw his behavior continue with others in our office. Fortunately for us, a new VP was hired last April, this pig was fired in July. No one knows for sure what happened, we can only speculate that the zipper got touched one too many times!
Robyn, you are absolutely right in that this isn't about sex. My lecture stands for women as much as men! As women, we have no right to speak to men in this manner either. I do apologize if I made it seem like it was about the sex of the individual--which is were my comments about women's dress in workplace came in. I should have been more specific there. We cannot expect to get ahead in the workplace if we behave in a manner unbecoming a HUMAN BEING (never mind gender!).
So, again, I apologize if I offended anyone. Please just understand this is not something we should laugh about.
