My job (OT)

K

Kathy02

Cathlete
Ok, for the past 6 years I've worked for my parents, helping them run their business. They might as well be retired, they don't have to do anything except to pick up a phone and call up potential clients maybe once a month. I do everything else. They do travel about once a year to visit existing clients or to talk person to person with potential clients.
Here's my thing. I'm thining that I need to get out of this job. I get paid minimally, I mean my brother just started at a job makng what I do now. No vacation, 401K, medical. And to top it off I only got half of my bonus this year and they aren't giving the rest to me because my poor brother is just starting off in the world so they are buisy giving him all their extra money. By the way, He doesn't work for them. Here's the thing, I'm a work at home mom with this job. Is it worth sticking around so I can stay at home? Or am I really worth more money than I think I am and should leave? My friends that are working for larger corporations think that I'm worth 2 times what I am getting paid.
One more complication, if my folks lose me, their company could easily fold. No one else can do my job, at least not them and I'm their only employee. What do I do?
I'm asking you ladies because you are removed from the situation and you might have more insight for me.

Kathy
 
I am a firm believer that money is not everything. It has to do with happiness. Also you are able to stay at home with this job-you need to weigh the good with the bad-and you need to follow you heart. Dont worry about your brother worry about yourself and do what you believe in your heart is best to do. Good luck
Lisa
 
I think you have to decide what's most important. Is being able to be home for your kids the most important? You stated you have no medical. Do you have a SO who has medical insurance? I think that's important for starters. I'm sure you could probably get more money on the outside but how badly do you need the money to work outside the home? Do your children need a babysitter? That might wipe out the extra money you would make working on the outside. I know when my kids needed one, it was like I was paying double rent. Also, have you discussed your thoughts with your parents? Could they hire someone else if you leave? How long before they might retire? I don't know how old you are but I think a 401K is important. The longer you're in it, the more time your money can work for you. I know it may sound selfish, but you do have to think about yourself and your family and what your needs are. I know I may have given you more questions than answers but hopefully if you can answer them all, you'll have what you're looking for. Good luck to you.

Marcy
 
Well, here's the thing. Dh is thining about taking my job here. He hates his job, and there is no real future for him. Plus he thinks that he would love to be a stay at home dad. This could mean more money for us to make ends meet. I'm 30 years old right now. But if Dh take my existing job he losses his 401K, and all of our health insurance. OUr son has diabetes, so we have to have health insurance. Of course, at a new job for me I would be making sure that they had a good health program before I took the job.
 
Hi Kathy,

Have you sat down with you parents and expressed your concerns? I think that might be the place to start. You will have to weigh the pros and cons because, like another poster mentioned, child care expenses can negate any extra earnings you might bring home with another job.

It's hard to assess your circumstances without further information. Do you have an SO/DH? If so, does he carry insurance? Your parents might be willing to increase your pay once they're aware of your needs and how you feel about things. Another thought to consider is if you will stand to inherit this business one day. These leaner times might seem more worthwhile if you stand to gain the whole kit-n-kaboodle.

I know I didn't have any great advice for you, but hopefully one of my questions helped you to think through your situation. Take care and good luck with your decision.

Michele
 
Kathy, I can see you and your DH have much to think about!! Shout out to your son- I'm type 1 too!!! :) Since I was 10 and now I'm 29 and have been on a pump for 11 wonderful years.

Generally, you can get COBRA insurance to cover you for a few months. It will be the same insurance you have through DH's work, but you pay all of it plus a small percentage administrative fee on top. It isn't cheap, but it will mean continuous coverage.

Can you send out some resumes and see what happens without making any actual changes with your current job or DH's current job? I love keeping options open while exploring...

GOOD LUCK!!!
 
Yeah, I do have my resume on Monster.com. Just to see if there is anything out there that would be worth my while. I've had a couple of people call me and offer me a few things, but nothing that I'm interested in just yet.
When I've mentioned to my folks that I'm worth more money than they are paying me they basically say good bye then. They will more than likely never retire completely. They have no money to do so with. This job is their only hope to continue living the life that they like to lead.
My dad thinks that when he passes on that his partner may just let me go and then I'm up a creek, with no paddle. My dad is 73, with 2 heart attacks and now has a pace maker, and is 100 pounds over weight. So that day may be coming sooner than I'd like it to. My mom has no idea what to do with this company if my dad passes on.
this is a complicated situation, huh?

Kathy
 
This is my experience with a stay at home husband...the pressure is enormous. You are the main breadwinner of the family. You carry the insurance so quitting without something lined up is out of the question. I also ended up doing all the housework in addition to working outside the home. Of course, this was just MY experience. hopefully, your husband is much more considerate than mine was. I actually ended up working two jobs so I could save up enough for maternity leave!
That's not to say you shouldn't try to find something else. I'm just not sure I would swap places with your husband. You truly do have a tough decision to make.
 
In all honesty, Kathy, I think you should get out of this situation and find a real job with real benefits, and your DH should keep the job he has replete with its benefits. It sounds like your parents have taken advantage of you for a long time, and your financial situation for your own family (which has to take priority over your parents' business situation) is precarious because of it.

Yours is indeed a complicated and tough situation, but it's not your fault that your parents are on such thin commons with their business and retirement prospects. And I think it's nibbling away at your emotional relationship with your parents.

The drawbacks of your situation, from what I can see, far outweigh the benefits of being able to work from home.

A-Jock
 
Kathy, forgive me if I'm being too blunt. I've had experience with family issues like this and am seeing things that ring a bell for me.

I see two issues here. First is that you are in a job that has no benefits, doesn't pay you what you are worth, and seems to have very limited growth potential. The upside to that is that you have the flexibility to work at home. The second is that you are working for family. This can be a real minefield, and it sounds like you have seen that your parents don't plan to leave you the business and they plan to funnel money to your brother rather than pay you your bonus. That doesn't make me feel that you are on solid ground financially.

So, if I'm reading this correctly, the only upside to the situation is that you have the flexibility to work at home. If that is the case, there are a lot of other ways to make money that would allow you to have flexibility without being dependent upon your parents' decision whether to pay you or not, and how much. You could start your own home business with no benefits, but at least you would control how much money you make. You could take part-time work with the goal of moving to full-time as your children get older. That way, you might also build some good contacts and references for the future.

The other half of this is what happens to your parents if you leave, and whether you would have to help support them if the business folded. That is, are you be subsidizing your parents retirement either way -- whether you stay at the job with low pay OR whether you leave and the business folds? It sounds like YOUR future is better, in terms of providing for yourself and your family, if you leave the business and take a job with growth potential. Otherwise, when they die, you are out of a job AND have no money, retirement benefits, severence, etc.

Again, I apologize if this sounds too harsh. Parents don't always see things as they ought to, and it would be a shame for you to lose out on building your own family's financial future due to that. They may be thinking that you work only for "pin money" and your husband will always be the one supporting the family. That may not always be the case, for any number of reasons, voluntary or involuntary.

Good luck with your decision!
 
Kathy, working in the family business is all well and good, but, forgive me for saying this, it sounds like your parents are undervaluing you. I don't think you should buy into the message they are sending. I think you need to get out there and find out what you are really worth, just for your own sense of self. To be harsh, I just don't approve of how they are treating you, and I'm sure that you deserve better. Do some interviewing and see what you can come up with. If you find something good, with decent benefits, then your husband can leave his job and take care of the kids once you've been hired.

-Nancy
 
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