Hi girls!!
Thanks for asking about me, and Robin, I'm so glad your DD is happy!
I survived the drop-off as did DH, DS #2 and our dear freshman. The drive home was long and I felt terribly sad, and then I had a fresh wave of sadness when I got home and saw his room, which he'd cleaned up and which felt -- VERY weirdly -- like his personal energy was simply missing from it; the room felt like a vacuum -- like an unoccupied hotel room. Very strange, and very sad.
But honestly, we're all doing fine. I haven't cried since the day we got home, although I've certainly had plenty of small moments when I am WAY too aware that he's really and truly grown up and gone away. Mostly, though, I'm okay -- life is going on for the rest of the family, and I'm staying busy. I miss him dreadfully but I know he's in a terrific place. He's been there a week today, and on the whole he's doing really well. He loves his dorm, likes his roommate and loves his classes. We've had lots of contact with him -- he calls home two or three times a day -- and most of our conversations have been happy ones. He's eager to report all the successes he's feeling and the fun he's having (e.g., "Well, I got all my books and found all my classrooms." or "Hey Mom, I'm just sitting at the bus stop waiting for the campus bus to take me back up to North Campus -- yeah, I figured it out, no problem" or "Mom, I won't be calling til late tonight because some dudes invited me to a party at the ATO house").
What's been hard for him, and tough for DH and me, is that he is an out of state kid who arrived knowing absolutely no one, and even though he's an outgoing kid who's making every effort, it's just hard work to get to know people. And he's always had a close-knit circle of buddies; he misses having "his people." So he's had some moments of what he calls being "disconnected" and he is a little lonely for family and friends. :-( These sad spells seem to be hitting him when he finds himself suddenly having a few hours to kill, but having no one he knows well enough yet to call up for company. It's then that he calls Mom and Dad. When we've gotten those "down moment" phone calls, we just keep reminding him that his feelings are completely normal, that he's only been there a week, that he's already met quite a few people and done lots of fun social things, that ALL of this adjustment simply takes time and that we have complete and total confidence that he'll be fine and it will all work out in the normal course of things. The good news in these conversations is that he is remarkably self-aware and knows what he's feeling, why he's feeling it and what might help. And, of course, it's great that he wants to talk about it with us.
We'll see him at Family Weekend which is the end of this month, and I expect that by that time he won't be having so much of that disconnected feeling.
http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0304/sport/sport-smiley-003.gif Kathy S.
http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0304/sport/sport-smiley-001.gif
