I know exactly what you're going through. Last June, I had just started WW, I'd lost about 10 lbs, but my nephew's graduation (out of state) was coming up and my SIL was coming to visit from across country. I knew that I'd have trouble controlling myself with all those tempting foods. I went to the graduation and, even though I ate well (it was REALLY HARD to do, too), I felt deprived all weekend. When my SIL came to town the following week, I ended up skipped a couple of dinners out because I couldn't face that deprived feeling again. Nowadays and 45 lbs lighter, it's easier. I just wasn't ready at the time.
So my advice is go with your gut. If you're strong enough to show up, drop off the gift and run out before the food is served - great (I love this idea, Robin!). If not, then skip the parties. In time you'll be able to face these things. You may just not be ready yet. And as for your friends, tell them honestly, "The tempting food is too much for me to handle right now. I know it sucks, but I can't make it to your party. In time, these things will get easier, I just can't do it now." If they really are your friends, they'll get over it.
So my advice is go with your gut. If you're strong enough to show up, drop off the gift and run out before the food is served - great (I love this idea, Robin!). If not, then skip the parties. In time you'll be able to face these things. You may just not be ready yet. And as for your friends, tell them honestly, "The tempting food is too much for me to handle right now. I know it sucks, but I can't make it to your party. In time, these things will get easier, I just can't do it now." If they really are your friends, they'll get over it.