Eating right and making healthy choices isn't something people just do. It takes training and practice like everything else.
Making small incremental changes will be easier and less overwhelming then making a lot of huge changes all at once.
Ellie Kreiger has a pretty good book called "Small Changes, Big Results" which has some wonderful suggestions for slowly adding in better habits over a 12 week period.
There are a couple of things that will really help.
1) Keep an honest food diary. (Seriously, if you don't record the cookie, the only person your fibbing to is yourself, and then what's the point) A food diary is a very important and useful tool. It is NEVER EVER to be used as a weapon to punish yourself and think poorly of yourself or your choices. It is a tool to help you learn and grow. It will help you identify patterns, and when used properly it will be a record of your journey to a better you.
2) Take time to plan out your food choices. Waiting until your hungry to figure out what you’re going to eat is setting yourself up for making poor choices. My judgment is terribly impaired when I am starving. I get super cranky and emotional, and am able to convince myself that McDonald’s is super yummy food that won’t make me sick this time.
It is really hard to go from not planning any meals (or only planning 2 or 3 a week) to planning 3 meals and 3 snacks a day. I don’t know why people think this is easy if you’re not used to doing it. It’s like asking a couch potato to get up and do IMAX3 from beginning to end in one day.
Pick one meal and start planning out the day before what you are going to do for that meal, go to the store, buy supplies, do some prep work, whatever. If you’re struggling with late afternoon hunger, plan out several days’ worth of snacks for that specific time. Buy Ziploc snack size bags and portion out some dried fruit, nuts, what ever. Tell yourself that when you get hungry at that time, you will enjoy your prepared snack. Finish that snack and don’t go back for seconds, even if you are still hungry. Wait at least 20 minutes. If you are still hungry after 20 minutes, consider whether or not you want to have another small snack or perhaps a glass of milk. Write it all down in your diary, not only what you ate, but how satisfying it was, whether you wanted more or something different. Try this for at least three days. Look at your notes and make adjustments. Maybe instead of dried fruit and nuts, what you really want is hummus, vegetables and a small whole wheat pita. Maybe instead of a 120 calorie snack you really need a 200 calorie snack to make yourself feel full and satisfied. Maybe instead of eating it at 4:00 you should try eating it at 3:30.
Once you master one meal, add another meal. Starts with your afternoon snack, then add breakfast or lunch. Maybe snacks are easier to handle at first then regular meals, so after you get comfortable with planning your afternoon snack, start planning out how you’ll handle dessert. (I can’t help it I really think everyone should have dessert every day.) Then add a mid morning snack. Breakfast is easier for some people to master then dinner, other find lunch the easiest of the main meals to master. Don’t be afraid to use leftovers as part of your planning process. There isn’t any reason why your extra salmon from dinner can’t also be used in some way for breakfast or lunch the next day.
Being strong in the grocery store is excellent advice, because then you don’t have to deal with saying no in your home. I have a huge problem saying no to regular Coke, so I never buy it. Instead I make Sun tea with various herbal teas and good old Tetley.
Just remember, you will never be able to just wander into the world and just happen across healthy food when you’re hungry. You don’t need to drag a cooler with you, but you do need to keep in mind what restaurants will be near where you’ll be. A lot of the chains have website and you can do some research before you go out. Figure out what are reasonable choices for your favorite restaurant when you are at home and not starving. It’s good to know that you can order 2 or 3 items from some restaurant’s menu and not blow your diet. And figuring that out when you aren’t starving will keep you from ordering the onion blossom of death at the outback.
I don’t know, maybe this isn’t the sort of thing you were looking for. I hope it helps.