Self Sabatoge


So, here I am again, finding myself beginning yet another new fitness / healthy living lifestyle. I jump in all excited, guns ablazin' and BAM, the weekend comes and I throw it all away!!! I'm looking for ideas / suggestions to staying on track during the weekends. I used to work a 2nd job so before my weekends were somewhat structured but now I find my "idle hands" make me eat and eat and eat!!

I had a fabulous week last week. I worked out 4 times. I drank lots of water. I ate incredibly well. Then we went to the exhibition on Saturday and even though I know in my head I shouldn't have indulged, that was all I could think about....carnival food - what a way to ruin a great week!!! Cripes, I was like a dog that had been starved - I couldn't get enough!! Then of course, came Sunday where I felt tired and lazy and spent the day in my PJ's brooding over my Saturday!! I don't want to be like this anymore!!! I need to somehow remember that feeling and perhaps use that as motivation???

I don't want to dwell on the negative feelings and I'm ready today to jump right back in. I'm just trying to find a way NOT to have every Monday as a new beginning! Does that make sense to anyone???



I often go away on the weekends, which makes following a good eating plan difficult, especially since I associate being in a hotel as a junk food free for all, so I have had to learn to get over that, but what has helped me is to choose a way of eating that allows me to indulge in the types and amounts of foods that are "legal" for me. I am following an eating style coined "primal", it's similar to Paleo eating, with a few less restrictions. Essentially I eat all meats, fats (healthy oils, coconut oil, avocado, butter, cream), vegetables (no potatoes), fruits, nuts (except peanuts), seeds, and limited dairy like cream, butter and cheese (I reserve cheese for only when I'm eating out, I don't keep it in the house), and I really don't eat anything packaged unless the ingredients are real food. Obviously to lose weight there must be some calorie restriction, but even if I overeat a few meals a week, but stick with my legal food groups, I don't gain weight, and it does not set me back too much.

By eating this way, and allowing myself free reign (within allowable food groups) during meals out, I just don't feel deprived and don't feel any guilt for eating a great meal.

I can't say I have lost much weight, but that is very typical for me, but my body composition is clearly changing, and my clothes are getting bigger. It's been about 7 weeks and down 5 pounds on the scale.

As far as blowing it, you didn't really, it was just one weekend, just get back to normal eating and keep up the workouts. :D


yes i know exactly what you mean. and many cathletes understand too.
first stop the neg. self talk. that is your critic talking, and when you examine what it says for facts they arent true!
ok you had a bad day. thats ok. it happens to us all even the thin people that seem to not even try. think about the situation. how did you feel?
now think how do you want to feel in that situation? what would you do differently? come up with a plan. then play that movie in your head. you ate a snack before you left, and drank water at the carnival for example. however you handle it. play the new positive movie in your head. play it a few times. write it down if that helps.
try each day to just do a little better.
thanks to another cathlete, i was pointed in the right direction. i think, Rapid Breath. IOWL-inside out weight loss pod casts. try to listen to those and do the mental hw. i'm only 10 sessions in, but i'm in the right direction.
you dont have to feel guilty when you over eat. redo the situation in your head. and think, what can i do to balance it out? a few more minsnof exercise next few days? eat a lighter meal next time you are hungry?
try to work on listening to your body. be aware of your sense of physical hunger. are you really hungry? lonely? bored? stressed?
you may still over eat, but the more you are aware of it the sooner you can stop yourself or at least learn from it for next time.
is there something you enjoy doing on the weekend? painting, gardening, knitting, declutter your house, clean with rubber gloves on, even cook wearing them so you dont lick your fingers. join a running club? or bowling league what ever you enjoy and helps you live life!
because thats the real goal isnt it? i want that too. i stopped counting cal. we just have to learn how to listen to our body. using food as fuel. exercise and eating heathy is important, but if we have inner conflict and issues to work out, we will eventually gain it all back.
during the mental work you may find its better to maintain until issues are resolved. then its off to the races!
you may also want to join some type of check in and use other ways to stay accountable.
and if the FREE podcast didnt work, what have you lost? nothing. but what if it does? where will you be in 6 mo? 5 years? lets hope we're both doing better.
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Thanks to you both. The sad part is I know what I have / need to do - it's just doing it that bogs me down!! I know 99% of us have all been there. And, you are right, it was just one day / weekend. Nothing to throw the towel in for. So, I've decided that the best plan of action for me this week is to stick to my healthly eating plan (which includes a food journal) and 5 workouts (last week I did 4 workouts). And when the weekend rolls around, I will have a menu planned and stick to it. It's really that simple. I just have to remember my favourite motto...
"Don't trade what you want most, for what you want at the moment"

My inspiration right now is my upcoming wedding (July 2011) but I'm beginning to think that my goal of looking fab for my wedding is too far in the future making it easy for me to slip up. I'm going to give myself weekly mini goals / challenges to help me get there.


Are you a member of one of the check-ins? Sometimes it helps when you have to be accountable to someone other than yourself....



I have clients that struggle with this same thing.....Here's some suggestions that seem to work for them....
1. If you have a "free meal" or "cheat meal" have it Friday night so that by Saturday morning you are actually reminded why you like to eat clean. Most of us know that after we eat crap after a week of clean eating, our bodies rebel and remind us why it feels so good to eat clean.
2. If you do foresee an event where you feel you might overindulge, hit the gym and work extra hard to earn those calories. Many of us work out hard all week and eat next to nothing, and then on the weekend we don't workout and we eat everything!! That needs to be switched around to see results.
3. Perhaps you are eating too little through the week and your body is telling you by Friday that you are too low in calories causing you to crave everything in sight on the weekends. Perhaps bumping up your breakfasts through the week, would be one way to ensure that you starting each day with an adequate amount of calories to keep your body satisfied.
4. If freedom from work on the weekends seems to trigger some sort of freedom in your meals, then don't beat yourself up. If you are going to eat foods you don't normally eat, just stick to only the recommended portion size, nothing more than the size of your open palm. And if you don't have the willpower to do that just yet, then try to avoid those trigger foods altogether.
5. Say you want a certain "unclean" food, and tell yourself you can have it just as soon as you eat 1 portion of lean protein, 1 portion of carbs, and 1-3 servings of veggies. After you eat all that, if you are still craving the junk, then have it. But I bet you'll be so full you won't be able to!
6. Stick to just 3 meals and one snack, and keep the meals around 400 calories a piece, and the snack around 200, putting you at 1400, which is about average needs for most women. Tell yourself you can indulge in whatever you want so long as you stay within your calorie range.
7. Check out on your phone or online. This is an app that helps you track your calories EASILY and reminds you of where you are during your day, so that you don't go over. It will figure your needs and then you enter all your food to see how you progress through the day. This will keep you honest!!!!

Hope that helps!


Jodelle, I think you made a typo with the daily calorie requirement. 1400 calories is too low, and I think anyone would have a difficult time sticking to this number, particulary if they are even moderately active.

I have used the TDEE from the workout manager and my calorie requirement to maintain at 147lbs is 2170 calories. I have been conservative by setting my activity level at "moderate" although I do usually exercise for at least an hour 4 to 6 days a week.

I was curious, so I entered my goal weight of 120lbs and my TDEE only dropped to 2023 calories, so it would seem that 1400 would not support the requirements of a person who is moderately active.

As I am trying to lose, I do eat below my TDEE, but I find that if I drop below 1600, I am grouchy and tired which leads to mindless eating to medicate myself.

Ruthie, perhaps you could sign up for an activity that is both fun and takes you away from tempation on the weekends? Also, although it sounds hokey, writing out your goals on cards and putting them around the house and in your purse will remind you of what is important to you - that funnel cake or doing up your favourite pair of jeans?
Write down your feelings when you are beating yourself up about eating something that made you feel regretful. You need to remember that you have no power over the past and the only way to change the future is in the present moment. Dwelling on yestereday's indulgence just takes away the positive energy you need TODAY to make changes.

Now I'm off to update some positive affirmation cards and stick them on my bathroom mirror :D

Keep up the good habits!


You guys really are great!! What wonderful advise / motivation tips!!! I've jumped back on the wagon full force with good eats and a workout schedule planned for the week.

Jodelle, I'm curious where you find out your information on how many calories you need per day. I did mine based on my BMR which came out to 1846 calories per day to maintain (at 174lbs), so I'm trying to eat about 1500 calories per day (I normally allow about 100 calories for mistakes, extras that I don't always count, so, let's say 1600)

Am I doing this wrong???


you can find your estimated bmr and tdee on workout manager on this site. remember its only a guideline, and sometimes we count our w/o or eating cals wrong. labels can be wrong too.



I completely hear you! What I am seeing here is a lot of 'all or nothing' thinking. I don't think you are actually blowing it as badly as you think. Keep in mind, those kinds of foods that we 'can't stop eating' aren't real food, they are designed to stroke the brain in the same centers as cocaine, fruit loops have been found to be more addictive than drugs. I'm not kidding. So if you find it hard to walk away, understand it is the core structure of your brain that the food pushers are counting on. For me there are foods which I just can't walk away from once I get started, its weird but that includes donuts (was I a police detective in a former life? idk, maybe.) The way you can tell real food from fake is that real food satisfies, you reach satiety (fullness) and feel content, I never felt content with a donut. Never. I do feel content with a stir fry or salad with a piece of fruit for dessert.

1. Do not beat yourself up. Every time you indulge in self recrimination (talking down to yourself) you raise your stress level, this releases cortisol, insulin and testosterone, all of which means that what you just ate went straight to your hips. If you want to enjoy something, truly enjoy it. Smile the whole time.

2. Eat more fats. Drizzle olive oil on stir frys, add more coconut oil, eat full fat plain yogurt (if you do dairy).

3. Be sure to get a good multivitamin.

4. Get all of your salts, potassium is critical to preventing weird cravings.

5. Definitely head over to IOWL (as mentioned above) also the Reasonable Diet Podcast addresses these issues as well, both are free on the internet.

6. Understand that you do need to have at least one higher calorie day/week. This will keep you out of a metabolic plateau. Food is not just for calories, there are a myriad of other micro nutrients that your body needs and you can't get in a vitamin.

What helps me is to budget some extra calories for something I really want (say a brownie, but thats just me or natural cheetos.) Then I work backwards, knowing that I can get a great deal of nutrition from lo calorie options like a green salad with a vinegar dressing.


The suggestion for 1400 was based on a generalization for most women who want to lose weight, and intended for workout days, but not for non-workout days. (Excuse me for not clarifying). That being said, I should indicate that taller, overwieght, or more active persons will require more calories . But in my line of work, I find that with most women with busy schedules with little time for exercise who are looking to lose wieght tend do well at this calorie range on non-workout days and more on workout days.
Ruthie, I think that you are correct to eat around the 1500 you are speaking of (with allowances). Without knowing your height and wieight and activity level, I'm not able to tell you exactly, but I find success with the majority of my female clients who create a structured eating pattern where they eat a bit more on their workout days, and a bit less on their non-workout days. I think you are on the right track with your calories, just so long as you keep them in check on the weekends too!

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