I'm experiencing emotional eating and can't stop

B

BAM

Cathlete
I'm going through a rough period of emotional eating right now and am feeling the affects of it but can't seem to stop. What's not making it easier for me is that I'm working at a pasty booth at a local fair for the next 2 weeks so the temptation is constantly in front of me. Yesterday I promised myself I wouldn't have anything but that idea quickly got squelched. The reason I'm eating is due to my mother living with me and how I'm just tired of this arrangement. Without making this really long by going into all the details, this situation probably can't change for at least a year (if at all) so somehow I have to come to some peaceful terms with myself so that I don't use food as an outlet. On top of that, I have hypothyroidism so I don't lose weight easily plus I have a digestive disorder in which my body swells out when I eat food, especially junk food. It starts in my thighs and goes to various other parts of my body and is also noticeable in my face. As much as my appearance bothers me when this happens, it's not enough to deter me from the emotional eating. (I'm working on correcting this condition but it's a very long process.) I also feel very lethargic when I eat this stuff. So I just don't know how to help myself stop this eating and unfortunately feeling so crappy afterwards makes no difference to me. I haven't experienced emotional eating for quite a long time and didn't think I'd do it again but here I am. I could choose fruit or other healthy snacks (which I do have available to me) but I just don't want them. If anyone has any suggestions, I'd be most appreciative. Thank you for listening.

Bam
 
BAM,

I don't know how to help you, but I just want to say that I hope that you feel better soon. I am sorry that you are going through such a hard time. Good luck to you and I hope that someone has answeres for you. {{{{HUGS}}}}

Lea
 
Bam, I went through this recently myself. I think I gained 7-8 lbs over the summer. I finally lost it over the last 2 weeks or so, but it took a lot of discipline.

The only advice I can give you is if you're having a tough emotional time, sometimes it's OK to find comfort in food & worry about losing it later. Everyone is different & has different things that help them work through emotional problems. You can't obsess about your diet, just do what makes you feel good & know that you can shed the pounds when you start feeling better.

I hope this helps--it's what happened to me this year & once I came out of my depression I was doubly determined to get back to my "fighting weight" as my ex hubby used to say.......
 
Hi BAM, sorry to hear of your difficult time and trouble with emotional eating. I think the trick will be to deal with the underlying cause of the eating ... the emotions ... in a healthier way. If the situation can't be changed, then learning to accept it, adapt and protect yourself will be important in this next year. You might try journaling, talking with a supportive friend or a counselor, etc. A healthier way to deal with emotions is to vent thru exercise as you already know ... so maybe get a workout buddy and go for a "walk and talk" on a regular basis. There may be other types of support groups you may be able to tap into. For instance, depending on where you live, there may be an EA group you could try nearby ... EA = Emotions Anonymous ... sort of like a support group with principles similiar to the 12 Steps of AA/NA. Depending on the details, there may be other types of groups to use for support. You may also find a support group online if there aren't any meetings nearby. It's important to do a lot of self-care at this time, besides eating healthy and exercising ... make sure you get enough sleep, have an outside social life, and learn some relaxation/stress managment techniques, perhaps something like meditation or yoga. Hope this helps. Deb
 
Thank you Lea, Laura and Deb for your support and suggestions. Since this has been bothering me for a long time, I have been doing some of the things you have suggested, Deb. The past few weeks have just really hit me hard. I will continue trying to find healthier outlets. Thanks again for all of your thoughts. It really helps!

Bam
 
Bam-

First, {{{{HUGS}}}} coming right to you.

Second, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! You need to know that. MANY of us have the same problems with emotional and out-of-control eating as you do.

Third, I think you have already started by coming out and asking for help. It's a sign that you WANT to change things. You already know you NEED to, but this shows now that you want to change. That's a big step.

Today was day 1 for me of putting an end to my most recent 3-week long binge. What ended it for me? I'm not exactly sure, and I can never tell when that switch will turn my eating on or off. I can predict what situations and what emotions help cause me to go on a binge. And that's the secret for me. What helps me is to be open and honest with somebody...first me, but then somebody else. My best friend, fortunately, is very patient with me and knows how important it is for me to stay focussed. As somebody already mentioned, I take some down time during the day and go for a nice long chit-chat walk with my friend. We are each others' sounding board, and IT HELPS!

With this most recent binge, I was a fraction of an inch away from going to an Overeaters' Anonymous meeting. I didn't, but at least I've done my research and know exactly where a weekly meeting is if I decide to go. Perhaps something like that will help as well?

I don't know if I helped you at all or not. What I do know is that I came here several months back with the same type of post and problem that you brought here, and the support and knowledge of these folks IS TREMENDOUS!

Hang in there.

Gayle
 
I went through the big eat a while ago. Couldn't stop. It were as though I were a robot under some remote control and ordered to go the fridge and eat. I ate ice cream, cakes, cookies, salads, chips and soda and still wanted more.

I sound like a commercial but I went and bought some of that Atkins canned drink you find in CVS or grocers. I bought chocolate. So I sat there before the tv and drank a chilled chocolate drink very slowly and felt satisfied...(not that hunger has anything to do with eating) but it satisfied my junk desire with the chocolate.

Eventually this eating phase left me.
 
Gayle, congratulations on ending your eating binge! You must feel great and in more control. How wonderful that you have a friend that can understand what you're going through. I'm glad it helps you!

Kazze, that's great that you found something that satisfied you. It's not everyday that you can replace a chocolate eclair with a chocolate drink when you get that craving but I'm glad it worked for you. I'll look for that at the store tomorrow.

Thanks again!

Bam
 
Bam,

You've got great suggestions above. I'd like to add things get better. Keep reaching out to caring people -- Like I said: Things get better.

What's helped me to rise above the diet/body/exercise wars is to take really good care of myself. Breathe, REST, pray, take time for hot showers and pampering yourself with soft music in the background, schedule in "play" time of your choice, just "be", read something that ignites your creativity or passions. And, brainstorm a plan of action to create your own paradise, which leads to...

Taking care of yourself also calls for major boundaries. Put yourself first, and don't feel guilty about that. I truly believe that respecting your own time and space will help others to respect it.

I still see a therapist who specializes in movement therapy and eating disorders. While I'm so much more peaceful feeling than the past, I still see her b/c opening myself up to underlying issues REALLY opened my life up to many other opportunities and blessings for which I like to have guidance. I look at my crazy eating spells as a sign that something was wayyyyy off track. Just lightbulbs to my real path.

One of my favorite books: "Eating in the Light of the Moon" by Anita Johnston.

From that book, try Geneen Roth books, and I love "Sensing the Self" by Sheila Reindl (Sensing the Self deals with women in recovery from bulimia -- describes their journeys, which helps to explain some behaviors, and it's inspiring to see how they sought health and hope and "Self" over destructive and smothering behaviors.)

Most importantly, don't beat yourself up! Take gentle care. I like what someone said above that sometimes you eat when you're upset, and that's okay. It's a coping mechanism. That's all. It's not dirty, it's not dreadful. It's okay -- you are taking care of yourself in the best way you know.

Be easy, be gentle, seek kind help.

Best,
Caroline

http://www.amazon.com/Sensing-Self-Sheila-M-Reindl/dp/0674004876
http://www.geneenroth.com/
http://www.amazon.com/Eating-Light-Moon-Relationship-Storytelling/dp/0936077360
 
Bam, You've gotten a lot of good advice. I don't have a lot to add, except there doesn't seem to be a magic formula to solve this problem. Try to keep busy, or talk to someone, even if it's just us on-line. You will always find great support here. Don't beat yourself up when you fall back into the abyss. Speaking for myself, the problem never entirely goes away, no matter how long you eat well. I hope you can find a solution to all your problems.
 
You have gotten some great advice here, and I have nothing to add but some {{{HUGS}}}. I am also an emotional eater, and I understand the frustration and almost powerlessness experienced when on a binge. I hope you find the strength to get through it!

Marie
 
I was thinking about this post when I got home from work last night, & you know what? I realized that binging really IS OK (as long as you're not purging too). What made me realize it was thinking about options when you're depressed (other than therapy, which I think is a great thing for some people). Here are the options I came up with:

--exercise (great but doesn't always do the trick)
--food
--cigarettes
--alcohol
--drugs

I'm glad I chose exercise & food. You should be too. Look at it this way--it makes you stronger than like 90% of the population. You should be proud of yourself, not down on yourself. :)
 
Lots of great advice here Bam .. stress can really take it's toll on your body and sanity .. (been there numerous times)

.. let me add .. try some relaxation therapy .. like yoga or meditation ...

.. any good bookstore usually will have some guided meditation audio books .. meditation really helped me when my Dad was in a car accident and had brain damage .. and I was NOT one that was "into meditation" .. but the tapes really helped calm me ..

.. and yoga .. you would be amazed at how it centers and calms you .. Byron Baptiste is my favorite .. his words are so rich and descriptive .. he guides you ever so gently into accepting yourself .. your limitations . .and celebrates the beauty within you ..

hang in there .. this too shall pass!! {{{{ hugs }}}}}:)
 
I thank ALL of you for your kind words and support. They are so heartfelt and it helps me tremendously. I had started a thread not too long ago asking "Why can't I find people like all of you in my daily life?" Well, we meet people in different ways and develop different types of relationships with them. You have given me the support that doesn't always come from the people you'd hope it would. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kindness!

Many, many (((((( HUGS )))))) to all of you! :* :* :*

Bam
 
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