Baby shower?

L

LizC7

Cathlete
Hello
Has anyone had a baby shower for baby #2 or 3? I had one for my first that my Mom threw me. My very close friend is my husband's cousin and wants to throw us one now for our third. She said we're going to need new stuff especially if it's a girl (our first two our boys) and she wanted to do a diaper theme or something. A few people have said you never have a shower after the first but I have read that every baby deserves a party.
Thanks for your thoughts.
 
I, personally, agree that there should only be a shower for the first one.

If she wants to do something, maybe have a clothing party, or something like that? But does she want you to re-register for everything? Like swings and boppy's etc?
To me, if it still works, it doesn't matter if it's pink or blue. Especially since most people are trying to squeeze every dollar they can out of their paychecks these days.

That's just what I was raised with in our family.
 
I agree with Melimcn.

Unless there is some serious extenuating circumstance(ie., you haven't had a baby for 10+ years, etc.) I don't see the need for another baby shower.

The idea behind giving a baby shower for the first baby is to help the new mother who has nothing(similar to what bridal showers used to be...you had a young couple who, usually, had never lived on their own and now needed everything to set up house.) It was never intended to be a *party for the baby.*

If your children are relatively close in age what you could really *need*? Aside from clothes(especially if you are having a different gender) everything else is generally gender neutral and if by some chance you have a blue crib would you really want a new one if you had a girl?

That said, if there is specific people who want to throw you a party I don't see any reason to tell them not to...I, personally, would just draw the line at inviting anyone who hasn't openly expressed an interest in doing this. I would hate for people to feel like they were being asked to subsidize my desire to have more children.

I guess what I'm thinking is: why can't your friend just give you gifts without the *party*? Does your friend/DH's cousin know that others want to be involved in a party? To a lot of people, especially nowadays, a baby shower is just a financial burden. If your friend wants to buy stuff I don't see why she can't do that without throwing some party and making other people(who may not want or be able to afford to) feel obligated, especially when your *needs* are probably fairly small(assuming your children are all relatively close in age.)

Just my 2 cents and Congratulations!:)
 
Last edited:
Thank you both and I was on the same page. We have two boys and I think my friend is just excited thinking this might be a girl. I told her we're covered as far as crib, swing, bouncer, even clothes because my cousin has two girls and we swap hand me downs. She said she really wasn't expecting a registry of any kind but wanted to plan it as a diaper party if anything where people could bring diapers and then just have a party. Someone else said that it would be better to do after the baby was born to welcome him/her to the family.
I didn't want to hurt her feelings, it was really a sweet idea but I didn't want to make anyone feel obligated to get us anything.
 
liz, perhaps you could have a small party. ????

i, for one, love showers. the games are always a blast, and who can say no to chatting and cake?
maybe just do a "shower" without the presents as just a way to get together with a bunch of girl friends who you'll shortly have no time to get together with?:p

congrats on your pg!
 
I totally can relate...

I am going thru the same thing right now. I am expecting baby 3 and I have previously a boy then a girl. So, I did already have 2 showers (mostly clothes the 2nd time) What happened is that I thought I would not have more children and I gave away EVERYTHING 2 years ago (I do mean EVERYTHING). So my sisters felt "obligated" to have one for me but I know secretly that they didn't want to. And I don't blame them. Planning is stressful. I finally just last week said to them, please I can't take the guilt...let's not do this again... It is my own fault that I got rid of everything.
So, over this past weekend, I bought out my entire registry at Target.com for myself. Sure it cost about $800 dollars (!!!!) and I am not quite done yet (!!!), but hey, it is better than the guilt of having people buy me things for the THIRD time! :) :)

Clarissa :)
 
well.. I'm on my third also. With my first I was a single mom and had nothing. thankfully I had a small shower. That stuff was long gone before I got married and had my second son. I had a shower then too but it was a different state/different people. We since got rid of everything. I wanted to keep stuff just in case but it was DH who said to just get rid of it all. We both thought we were done. Now this one is coming. My youngest will be almost 6 when hes born. I have NOTHING left. not a thing. Even if I had with the 4 or so moves we've had since my youngest was little the stuff would be all tore up from storage/moving. So I'm slowly collecting what I can. We don't have alot of money to spend.
But that said I'm not "expecting" a shower. but if I had friend who wanted to give me one to be nice then I wouldn't have been against it.. except now having read this thread I'd feel very uncomfortable knowing this is the typical attitude about it.
 
jess, i'm all for a multiple showrs! i love to throw em and i love to have them thrown for me! :D

i buy a baby gift for preggos even if there is no shower. so id rather that there was a shower - lets play games and eat!:D

my sil had a shower for my 2nd girl, 2 yrs after my 1st girl.
my 3rd girl is 4.5 yrs after my 2nd. we thought we were done. had to buy quite a bit too. a shower woulda been great!:eek:

think of it this way, jess. if someome wants to throw a shower for you, let them. if someones offended and doesnt want to come they dont have to!:) party on!!:D:cool:
 
Here's a link to another kind of celebration people choose for second, third, etc. children. Within my circle of friends this is what they generally do, however, like the article states they prefer not to use the term Blessingway. The last one I attended, my friend had an almost 3 year old and everyone brought a healthy, convenience food item to help make it easy for her to get food for her family while caring for a new baby. Sometimes there are no gifts at all, it usually depends on the family's situation.

http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/blessingway/a/aa102202a.htm
 
Here's a link to another kind of celebration people choose for second, third, etc. children. Within my circle of friends this is what they generally do, however, like the article states they prefer not to use the term Blessingway. The last one I attended, my friend had an almost 3 year old and everyone brought a healthy, convenience food item to help make it easy for her to get food for her family while caring for a new baby. Sometimes there are no gifts at all, it usually depends on the family's situation.

http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/blessingway/a/aa102202a.htm

Another thing we do is set up a food train and people sign up for certain dates and provide a meal for the family. One of my friends who had twins (now 5) had people bring meals for two months and it meant the world to her as she also had a toddler to take care of.
 
I was surprised over the weekend with a baby shower. I wasn't expecting one because I am expecting my 3rd (a girl). My two older kids are both boys. I last had a baby 14 years ago and everything seemed brand new to me. At first, I was a little uncomfortable, but was told that I should have a shower because it was fun for my co-workers to plan the surprise, that this is my 1st girl; that I had been trying for 4 years to have another child; and it was a way for everyone to show me that they care about me. It was nice. I did notice though, that I received mostly baby clothes. Which was fine with me because I wanted to pick out my own big items.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Our Newsletter

Get awesome content delivered straight to your inbox.

Top