She has alot of nerve....

A

ALIO0026

Cathlete
O.K. so you know how I posted about my MIL cutting my daughters hair right. She has the nerve to get pi$$ed off at me today. Well we started off going to a couple stores shopping. Then her husband invites us to dinner.After when we're in the car I pat his shoulder and say "thank you" a couple seconds later she says "next time I'll pay so you can tell me thank you". And I'm like "oh, thank you too". Then she drops me and my daughter off at home and leaves with her husband in MY car, that I've been letting her use while shes here.
I'm just so upset right now, I'm ready for her to leave TODAY!

Just needed to vent.

http://www.picturetrail.com/alio0026
 
The only way I can relate to this is to remember that there were several times that my DH and I paid 50/50 for a gift for my stepson and my stepson said "thank you, Dad". My DH has started having me sign the check or fill out the card, or hand my stepson the gift just so that I get some credit, and it has worked out very well. But I would never dream of saying anything like that. Your MIL sure sounds like she could use some social skills!

Hope she leaves soon.

-Nancy
 
Sounds like you can't win with her no matter what you do. The hair thing was pretty bad; when it comes to things like her little digs on you, try to keep them from getting to you. I think venting online is a great way to blow off steam. She'll be gone soon I hope!
 
She sounds petty, self-centered and immature. She definitely has control and insecurity issues.

I can hardly wait for her to leave for your sake!! Hang in there, girlfriend!

P.S. I've asked my husband to slap me if I ever start behaving like his mom!

~ Kim

"Welcome the challenge...embrace it...don't fear it." - Cathe Friedrich
 
The woman is evil, nasty, and self-centered. In many cases of evil MIL's, the DIL is told she's overreacting. In case anyone has said this, you're NOT.

I'm sorry this is ruining your holiday. Take care of yourself. E-mail me any time if you want to vent.

Trust me, I've been there!
 
You poor girl! You MIL has some real issues...insecurity, controlling, thinking she's the middle of the universe...she's making my late MIL sound really nice (she wasn't totally evil, but she sure drove DH and me and even her poor DH nuts at times...now I miss the old girl...I can say that...she was MY MIL! and I did love her).

The only thing I can say is keep coming here and venting...we'll listen and try to help you keep your sanity and survive. And hopefully she'll go back home SOON!
 
thejster- I agree. That "overreacting" argument is particularly annoying. It seems that's what people say whenever they are wrong; that the other person is overreacting. My father used to say that I was "too sensitive", when in fact he was too insensitive.
 
>thejster- I agree. That "overreacting" argument is
>particularly annoying. It seems that's what people say
>whenever they are wrong; that the other person is
>overreacting.

I agree. Typical tactic of the offenders.

I'm thinking next time this woman (I don't even know her, and I don't like her!) comes to visit, make sure your daughter is weariing pink-dyed cornrows or something. A couple of tattoos for good measure. Then see how MIL reacts.

Do you do KPC? Maybe invite MIL to workout with you...Bam! ooops! sorry, I didn't know you were so close to me! }(

She seems both insecure and controlling. But I guess those often go together: people who feel they have to be in control because of their insecurity.
 
At the next Cathe road trip, we can all pose in a big picture holding a sign up that says "Thank you" to your MIL.
I hope a magic carpet appears momentarily and takes her back to her people and leaves you to enjoy your beautiful kids.

Sending you vibes of support and good cheer...from someone who has struggled with her MIL's baffling digs for years...You're not too sensitive.


:) :)
Barb
 
>At the next Cathe road trip, we can all pose in a big picture
>holding a sign up that says "Thank you" to your MIL.

Did you know it's possible for about 9 people (my guesstimate) to spell out "Thank You" using only their middle fingers? (Where's the "sweet little old me" smilie batting its eyes innocently? }( )
 
ALI:

Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop venting and start doing something about this exceptionally ungrateful woman's behavior. You are letting her walk all over you. I wouldn't have dignified her money remark with a "thank you." I would have simply smiled a kiss-my-arse grin at her (accompanied by an irritatingly-raised eyebrow and a cock of my head to the side - body language speaks volumes). I would never have even let her use my car...unless, of course, she paid me what she would have paid a rental car company. And, had she cut my daughter's hair without my permission, I would have firmly let her know that it would NEVER happen again without repercussions. And, finally, if I were in your shoes and she was driving me as crazy as she's driving you, I'd have told her to leave, and then next year, the only way she'd visit is if she stayed at a hotel and rented her own d@mn car...and agreed to not touch my daughter's hair. You do not need to be exposed to such a "toxic" person. You have a right to say, "If you can't respect me, my belongings, and my family, then you do not need to visit, and you do not need to stay in my home."

I know it's hard to stand up to the in-laws, but it sounds like you've had it with this one...and you need to draw the line and demand (by words or actions - preferably a combination of both) her respect.
 
Too funny Kathryn!

Sorry to hear about her - sounds like a no win situation. If you call her on it I'm sure it will get even worse.

Has she always been this way?
 
It's good to vent...you certainly need to!!! IMO you are still upset with your MIL for cutting your daughter's hair without your approval...and I don't blame you. I'm sure everything that happens now will just insult to injury. I think that's kind of a normal reaction when you feel wronged and there is no resolution or apology.

I think I would ask her is she has a "problem" with me or with something that I've done or said because she certainly seems to be displaying some type of passive aggressive behaviors towards you. (Just my opinion, as I'm not a therapist).

I too hope she goes home very soon!!! Did you say she visits three times a year???? I hope things can get resolved before the next visit.

P.S. Saw the pic of your MIL...oh my goodness gracious..haha.

It'll get better...hang in...keep venting and have a Happy New Year!!!
 
Ali-
What a funny picture! Look at the expression on her face! She looks like everything you describe and then some. Too funny. Thanks for sharing.

-Nancy
 
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