The past two days have been interesting in a way - things popping up to test my resolve and what I choose to do moving forward.

Have I had a few regrets...absolutely! I actually have a lot and it's time to let them go. Most of them are things I can't change but many of them are things I can start changing. For example, I regret not having the confidence when I was younger to try things and not care what other people think. I missed out on a lot. But I don't have to continue the pattern. I also regret not taking care of myself and gaining all this weight (AGAIN) but again, the pattern can stop here.

Yesterday I was subject to some unexpected criticism. Criticism likes me or rather people like sharing their criticisms of me with me. It bothered me at first but then I remembered that I can't take in other people's opinions of me anymore. I'm reminded of this quote: 'their opinion of me is NONE of my business'. It's so true - even if they choose to make something personal - it isn't. Because their opinion is just that - THEIRS. And most of the time, it says a lot more about them as a person than about me. And I realized I don't have to react to it anymore - because you can't convince people if they have made up their mind and have to be 'right'. But criticism is just them sharing THEIR opinion. I don't have to accept it - I can just thank them for their opinion and leave it at that. I decide MY TRUTH not them.

And I'm reminded a lot today of how much criticism (I think most people feel the same way) that has been directed at me over the years. I don't know the reasoning behind some of them (some I can guess but you never really know what goes on with people or why they do the things they do). But like I mentioned above, just because they think something and say something doesn't make it true. I've had a lot of people say I couldn't do stuff and I proved them wrong. I have a lot of people thinking I can't ever lose weight and I'm proving them wrong! People say I will regain it again...NOT HAPPENING!

I know who I am. I know what I'm capable of. I know what I've done in the past and mistakes I have made. It doesn't mean I can't accomplish something now and it doesn't mean I can't become the person I want to be. I choose these things. And I finally understand that. I choose. And the good thing is that I'm choosing to keep going. I haven't let these things derail me. I spent a good part of last year allowing it to derail me...NO MORE. And I know it will get easier and easier. I'm getting more confident in myself and while there are good things and bad things (and I know what they are so no one needs to inform me of them), I'm OK with who I am. So bring on the criticism because it's not changing anything....